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Author Topic: Afraid that God hates me  (Read 400 times)

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Offline Mairi

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Afraid that God hates me
« on: August 26, 2014, 01:46:00 AM »
I've been with this thought for a while now.
But recently I've been secretly messing with numerology, which I wouldn't have had to do, but something to do with one of my anxiety hadn't forced me to. Now I've been thinking- Is this wrong? What if God hates me? What if He wants to cut me off? What if I'm on the "dark side" now? Am I a bad person?
I've also been afraid of being possessed ever since this started. I am so afraid of becoming possessed! I think I almost have a few times. If I think about it, it gets difficult to breathe and I feel this heat inside me and a sick feeling in my body and mind that I can't control. It feels like I'm helpless towards this feeling and it'll overwhelm me no matter what, but luckily I've forced it off with my mind every time, though just barely.
I also came across a bible verse today that suggested that what I'm doing is wrong. It really struck me and scared me and it prompted me to write this post. I hope so much that it was only a coincidence. Do you think it was? Please say yes!
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Offline CrazyD3an

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #1 on: August 26, 2014, 04:10:14 AM »
i wont go into religious things as most the time ot offends people. but i can tell you how you can know whether you are a bad person or not. Just think of your life till now, and if you dont find anything in which you have hurted any living being, that means you are clean. If you intentionally hutted someone than it might be a thing. and about god cutting you off, dont let these things come in your mind. i have been through this Nd made mistakes. God or say nature has given you everything you need. and he wanted to cut you off, you wouldnt be posting this today. So, donnt worry. CONCLUSION: Realize your sins, make them right and enjoy your life. God will give you whatever you want and also will take everything when he wants. its just about time. se have to wait. Thinking over never helps. but moving on does some.
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Offline ShawnW

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #2 on: August 26, 2014, 07:53:14 AM »
I've been with this thought for a while now.
But recently I've been secretly messing with numerology, which I wouldn't have had to do, but something to do with one of my anxiety hadn't forced me to. Now I've been thinking- Is this wrong? What if God hates me? What if He wants to cut me off? What if I'm on the "dark side" now? Am I a bad person?
I've also been afraid of being possessed ever since this started. I am so afraid of becoming possessed! I think I almost have a few times. If I think about it, it gets difficult to breathe and I feel this heat inside me and a sick feeling in my body and mind that I can't control. It feels like I'm helpless towards this feeling and it'll overwhelm me no matter what, but luckily I've forced it off with my mind every time, though just barely.
I also came across a bible verse today that suggested that what I'm doing is wrong. It really struck me and scared me and it prompted me to write this post. I hope so much that it was only a coincidence. Do you think it was? Please say yes!

God adores you.  We all sin, have sinned, and will sin.  It's part of the human condition.  Our acceptability to God is not dependent upon our goodness, because none of us are good.  I think you engaged in an activity that brought you guilt and shame...now you have anxiety over it.  But, God does not hate you.  I would suggest you go to Biblegateway and look up Romans 7 with the Message translation (I find it easier to read).  Paul himself talks about his own struggles and he wrote much of the New Testament.  So often religion is a chain around the necks of believers...convincing them that if you mess up, don't believe the right thing, say the right thing, go to the right church etc that you are unacceptable, unloveable, going to hell, whatever.  It's nonsense.  Should we run around doing whatever we want?  Of course not, we should respond to the love and grace God is pouring into our lives.  We should love Him and others.

If I may make a suggestion...I think it would help you much.  It was a game changer for me.  The book Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning is one of the finest works of Christ centered literature ever written.  When I see people struggling with what you are struggling with...I recommend it.  I have yet to have anyone not deeply effected by it.
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My insight, thoughts, experiences or advice that may be posted in this forum are not meant as a substitution for the advice of your physician.

Want to know how to address your anxiety?
http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/topic,93402.msg521266.html#msg521266

Online tinam7

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #3 on: August 27, 2014, 08:52:15 AM »
I lean toward Buddhism, having found it to be so very liberating. It accepts life as suffering (First Noble Truth), but tells us we can make it better.

Meditate every day which is calming, soothing, and empowers me independent of anyone or anything else.
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Offline ShawnW

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #4 on: August 27, 2014, 09:42:48 AM »
Tinam, even though I am of a different faith I see much truth in Buddhist principles.  Acceptance is the key.  Not fleeing from pain, but seeing it as a teacher...a guide.  Pain in inevitable.  Do we want to be a neurotic sufferer or a productive sufferer?  Personally, I want to learn and grow instead of needlessly suffering.  Where there is pain...there is a lesson to be learned. 
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My insight, thoughts, experiences or advice that may be posted in this forum are not meant as a substitution for the advice of your physician.

Want to know how to address your anxiety?
http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/topic,93402.msg521266.html#msg521266

Online tinam7

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #5 on: August 27, 2014, 10:42:07 AM »
Actually I am of no faith having abandoned the faith I was born into. And Buddhism, to me, is an outlook, a philosophy, an approach to living with ourself and with others. Buddha was a man, claiming to be nothing else.

Learning and growing are indeed key principles. You said previously, "God adores you." Could be. But why should he adore me and be so indifferent to millions others? We need not go there, but no doubt we can find plenty to agree on and maybe Mairi will be less fearful.
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Offline superapple

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #6 on: August 27, 2014, 12:49:10 PM »
As long as you believe in god and you are sorry, god will be with you and forgive you 
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Offline ShawnW

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #7 on: August 27, 2014, 01:01:55 PM »
Actually I am of no faith having abandoned the faith I was born into. And Buddhism, to me, is an outlook, a philosophy, an approach to living with ourself and with others. Buddha was a man, claiming to be nothing else.

Learning and growing are indeed key principles. You said previously, "God adores you." Could be. But why should he adore me and be so indifferent to millions others? We need not go there, but no doubt we can find plenty to agree on and maybe Mairi will be less fearful.

I see everyone, every person as having faith whether they see that or not.  The atheist has faith from a very disadvantaged and limited view point that there is no God.  They have no proof either way.  There is some solid science that shows much order in our universe...shows that current theories of Creation must break certain laws of science in order to be true.  That is faith.  Same can be said of the Christian, the Muslim, and the Jew.  They have to deal with questions many propose...why do good people suffer, where is God, why doesn't He show himself etc and so on.  What I have found is most people take the stance that most meets their need.  Many atheists were turned off by traditional religion, and IMO rightfully so.  They were told abusive things such as you need to earn love from God.  If you don't love God you will burn in hell for eternity etc and so on.  But, I have found few ask themselves what if God does indeed exist...and religion is a failed attempt at understanding our Creator.

For the record, I have no need for others to see these things as I do.  I am not dogmatic to the point I am unwilling to learn...and grow.  I have no need to "convert" you or anyone else.  I do however try to meet needs.  When I see someone struggling within religious bondage, I try to help because I speak their language. 

As for your questions about why would God love her and not others...this isn't really the format for this kind of discussion.  With that said, I will say this...you, myself and all others have a very limited vantage point.  None of us know for sure what happens after death.  I can think of 100 scenarios where pain and suffering would make sense depending on what happens in the afterlife.  We assume that because we suffer that God is not good, or that he doesn't exist.  It's a failed starting point.  We place no personal responsibility upon ourselves for the mess we are in...and assume that God should clean up after us.  But, what if that is the purpose of this all...to experience love and loss...good and evil along with the consequences within those choices...healing and hatred...and from that gain spiritual understanding and training for another step after this one.  Would suffering make sense in this scenario?  To me it would.  To others it may not.  But, no matter our understanding...it doesn't prove or disprove...it's faith.

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My insight, thoughts, experiences or advice that may be posted in this forum are not meant as a substitution for the advice of your physician.

Want to know how to address your anxiety?
http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/topic,93402.msg521266.html#msg521266

Online tinam7

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #8 on: August 27, 2014, 03:01:08 PM »
So I have a faith? Sure admit I know very little.  Consider our solar system? Our Galaxy? Gazilion Galaxies? Black Holes? A Universe? Vastness beyond comprehension. Jesus said believe in me and you have everlasting life. This is the one problem (for me) with Jesus who was brilliant in his teachings. Does it generally come down to the afterlife? I take full responsibility for myself and my actions, or at least try to. No shifting to God. Purpose is another tough one. Jesus' teaching of Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself is a mighty good start. We are here to love ourself and one another. Instead, what do we do?

Don't know where I came from and don't know where I'm going. Good enough for me.
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #9 on: August 29, 2014, 09:50:06 AM »
 :action-smiley-065:  God doesn't hate you. There is no reason to even imagine that. Numerology is in no way a bad thing. It is not something you could harm anybody with. It is much like a normal horoscope only done out with numbers. From reading a few of your posts, it would seem that you see something, or read something, and this in turn puts a negative thought into your head. Like you saw that add for the game on you tube. You saw these dogs in the game. Then got the idea that such dogs were after you. I think this is the exact same sort of thing. You think numerology is wrong. Something that is punished by God. Then you try to make sense of why you do these things and your mind imagines possession. Over  active imagination. I would suggest you maybe read something more calming. With nicer images. Listen to more of that beautiful music you are in to. Then you will push the bad thoughts out of your head.
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Offline Salus

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Re: Afraid that God hates me
« Reply #10 on: September 18, 2014, 12:03:35 PM »
Jesus doesn't hate you, Jesus means Savior , he came to save you, he loves you soo much he died on the cross for you. Never think that, when you sin tell God your sorry and he immediatedly embraces you. If he was your enemy why would you want to go to Heaven, think about that
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