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Author Topic: Scared. Biggest mistake.  (Read 250 times)

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Offline Kmj023

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Scared. Biggest mistake.
« on: August 18, 2014, 06:48:49 PM »
Feb I got bad sinus infection which threw my equilibrium off and what set off my anxiety in a horrible way. And since I had to wait a long time to see an ent to get treated it put my anxiety Into a spiral cause I was worried sick something was seriously wrong with me. I had a fear of walking cause the floor moving feeling was giving me terrible panic attacks. And I was worried and stayed in bed all day but I did get up to use bathroom and shower. and brain tumor fear was the main thing. But I am getting over that fear but now I am even more worried cause in beginning of June I was working on getting my strength back in my legs. But I was feeling dizzy again and made the mistake of letting anxiety push me back in the bed. Since the middle of June I've been in the bed, flat on my back or on my side. I've not moved from my bed. I potty in a bed pan. I take sponge baths. My legs are skinny. I have days where I can't eat cause I'm worried about my health. I had a tooth infection but I'm on meds for it. Now I'm having tmj problems, I have muscle contraction headaches every night that are extremely painful. I get dizzy laying in bed. I have tried sitting up on my bed but when I do, my head is so dizzy and i can't sit up for very long.

It's not that I don't want to be out of this bed, it's the fact I do but since my body is not used to gravity, it's hard to sit up without feeling terrible. I've talked to a doctor online who says this is normal cause my body needs to adjust and suggested compression stockings to possibly help with the dizziness and for me to not sit up long at a time cause I could pass out which scares me. I think once I can get passed being so dizzy sitting up I will be feeling better and can try walking with a Walker.

I'm just worried what this has done to my health. I don't feel healthy at all. I have morningss where I wake up anxious and feel sick. I hope it's just stress from being in bed so long.

It's just me and my mom here in this house. I wish that I could be in the hospital so they could get me straightened out and get me on my feet. But I don't believe they will admit me. Anxiety has done a number on me. I know I allowed it but all I wanna be able to do is just be able to sit up in bed and walk.  I'm afraid my body will shut down. I'm just so stressed out over this. I bet I'm the first person who has ever had this to happen. :(
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"The only illness that we can't accept is hypochondria."

"Never Google, everyone will catch an invisible tumor!"

"Anxiety is not a doctor. Neither is the internet."

Actual diagnosis : chronic sinusitis.
Google diagnosis : brain cancer.

Symptoms : dizzy head feeling.

Offline Raaawr

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #1 on: August 18, 2014, 07:06:07 PM »
You have a bit of a paradox there. You are afraid of staying in bed because of the damage it could do to your health but you dont want to get out of bed because of the fear of the damage that could do.

Staying in bed all the time is not healthy physically or mentally, I dont know how long you have been in bed but you could well be doing damage to yourself. Please please get out of the bed and start moving around. If you have been in bed for a very long time it might be worth getting some physio work done.
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Since July 23rd 2014 I have had;
Brain Tumor, 5x Heart Attacks, 2x Blood clots in leg, 1 blood clot in Arm, 2x Appendicitis, Pulmonary Embolism, Brain Tumor, Internal Bleeding, Ebola.

Offline sixpack

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #2 on: August 18, 2014, 07:07:43 PM »
kmj

I really don't have adequate words here.  I  just feel so badly that you are going through such a a trial in your life.

However, IF your body is in such a state as you describe to the point that you have to use a bed pan, it does seem that a hospital could help you more than what you can do on your own.

perhaps that is a viable avenue?
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MOST anxiety occurs on a subconscious level.  JUST because you don't feel consciously anxious or had a day or two of calm doesn't mean your mind & body are relaxed.  It can take months of reduced anxiety before a body goes back to a more non-reactive state

Offline wegngis

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #3 on: August 18, 2014, 07:10:50 PM »
I saw a physical therapist that specialized in vestibular therapy.  It worked wonders for me.  Although I can offer little to you in terms of real help, however I would encourage you to look forward to the time in your life that you will look back on this and be able to say, "Look what I've overcome."

We're all pulling for you.
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MOST anxiety happens at the subconscious level.  JUST because you don't feel consciously anxious or had a day or two of calm doesn't mean your mind & body are relaxed.  It can take months of reduced anxiety before a body goes back to a more non-reactive state.  - AnxietyZone member Sixpack

Offline Kmj023

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #4 on: August 18, 2014, 07:17:46 PM »
You have a bit of a paradox there. You are afraid of staying in bed because of the damage it could do to your health but you dont want to get out of bed because of the fear of the damage that could do.

Staying in bed all the time is not healthy physically or mentally, I dont know how long you have been in bed but you could well be doing damage to yourself. Please please get out of the bed and start moving around. If you have been in bed for a very long time it might be worth getting some physio work done.


I have been trying to sit up more but doctor said for me to not try to walk until I can sit up without feeling really dizzy. I do leg exercises in bed with ankle weights. Believe me I would be out of this bed in 10 seconds if it wasn't for being so dizzy headed cause I do totally realize what being in bed for a long time can do. Which is why I'm struggling with this. I didn't realize that it would do this to me if I did it would have never let this happen.



I don't know about these hospitals around here. They only admit you if you are in a life or death situation.  My anxiety is actually not as bad as it was, it's only triggered by worrying about how I can get over being dizzy headed so I can sit up and walk again.  I've been in bed for over a month. And believe me, I want out of bed so bad.
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"The only illness that we can't accept is hypochondria."

"Never Google, everyone will catch an invisible tumor!"

"Anxiety is not a doctor. Neither is the internet."

Actual diagnosis : chronic sinusitis.
Google diagnosis : brain cancer.

Symptoms : dizzy head feeling.

Offline Kmj023

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #5 on: August 18, 2014, 07:22:16 PM »
My vestibular system isn't causing the dizzy head. The doctor online said it's coming from blood pressure dropping since my body is used to laying down and not used to gravity. Which is why he suggested compression stockings. I ordered some today so I'm praying they will help. Once I'm able to sit up without feeling so dizzy headed that will be my first step to getting better.
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"The only illness that we can't accept is hypochondria."

"Never Google, everyone will catch an invisible tumor!"

"Anxiety is not a doctor. Neither is the internet."

Actual diagnosis : chronic sinusitis.
Google diagnosis : brain cancer.

Symptoms : dizzy head feeling.

Offline wegngis

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #6 on: August 18, 2014, 07:27:45 PM »
If that's the case, maybe you need to be treated like a returning astronaut.  I have no idea what that would be, but another thought.
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MOST anxiety happens at the subconscious level.  JUST because you don't feel consciously anxious or had a day or two of calm doesn't mean your mind & body are relaxed.  It can take months of reduced anxiety before a body goes back to a more non-reactive state.  - AnxietyZone member Sixpack

Offline Kmj023

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #7 on: August 18, 2014, 07:31:49 PM »
That's what I looked at online. Astronauts do not have gravity in space which is why when they are back on gravity their bodies are all out of whack.  So I keep telling myself if they survived I can too. I don't know how pregnant women can stay in bed for months when some are on bed rest.
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"The only illness that we can't accept is hypochondria."

"Never Google, everyone will catch an invisible tumor!"

"Anxiety is not a doctor. Neither is the internet."

Actual diagnosis : chronic sinusitis.
Google diagnosis : brain cancer.

Symptoms : dizzy head feeling.

Offline PantsyAntsy

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #8 on: August 18, 2014, 08:14:38 PM »
I'm confused. Do you have a legitimate medical issue that has left you flat on your back in bed, or is this all just fear and you climbed into bed on your own?

I will say, the doctor you consulted sounds like a quack. On earth, we are all subject to gravity at all times, whether standing up or lying down. There should be no reason you aren't "used to" gravity. Rather, your muscles have atrophied through lack of use. When you stand, yes, you are going to feel shaky. ThAt's normal. The best thing you can do is get up and walk. Just do it multiple times a day. I imagine getting out of bed and physical activity will make you feel ten thousand times better. I always feel like absolute crap with worse aches and pains when I laze around in bed. I can't imagine how you feel if you've been there since February!!! Please just try to stand up, like right now!
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Offline Kmj023

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #9 on: August 18, 2014, 08:35:12 PM »
 Anxiety and panic attacks did it cause I was still having some issues with my sinus infection. I have not been in the bed since February. I was walking around and moving. It was only in June where I stayed in the bed. So it's not been for very long period which is why I'm not letting it carry out any longer.

No, this doctor isn't a quack. I read on many websites the effects of bed rest and when the body is lying down the blood pressure is effected cause when the body sits up right, blood is being pooled to the lower body and not enough to the heart cause of the body having to adjust to having something not up against it. It's complex to explain but I've read about it which is why I people can pass out if not careful. Which is why I was told not to stand up just yet. And to try sitting up first for at least a few minutes a day but not for long so I won't over do it.  Bed rest is like being in space. I was just looking online at how nasa actually pays people 5,000 a month to stay in bed for 60 days to see how the body is effected. I would be rich if I was getting paid. But you couldn't pay me a million bucks to stay in bed which is why I'm trying to find ways to help myself get thru this.
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"The only illness that we can't accept is hypochondria."

"Never Google, everyone will catch an invisible tumor!"

"Anxiety is not a doctor. Neither is the internet."

Actual diagnosis : chronic sinusitis.
Google diagnosis : brain cancer.

Symptoms : dizzy head feeling.

Offline PantsyAntsy

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #10 on: August 18, 2014, 11:52:29 PM »
Well, I'm sorry you're going through this. Start small and just start sitting up. You will get there!
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Offline Kmj023

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Re: Scared. Biggest mistake.
« Reply #11 on: August 19, 2014, 12:10:52 AM »
Thanks for all the support. I have had days where I feel like I will overcome this and today not one of them. Might be my crazy hormones cause just finished my monthly cycle. When I sat up the other day despite of how bad the dizzy head was, I made myself do it and I felt it inside of me that I can do this. Anxiety from all this is just making me feel run down like my body will shut down on me. I get upset when I can't eat cause I love to eat but my tmj issue is acting up again due to tension I'm sure.
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"The only illness that we can't accept is hypochondria."

"Never Google, everyone will catch an invisible tumor!"

"Anxiety is not a doctor. Neither is the internet."

Actual diagnosis : chronic sinusitis.
Google diagnosis : brain cancer.

Symptoms : dizzy head feeling.

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