While I had understood, to some extent, for years (at least on a superficial intellectual level) that anxious thinking was a significant player in my world, it wasn't until 5 years ago did I start gaining a deeper understanding of it not only intellectually, but more importantly, emotionally. You know somewhat recently I was reading some of my first posts I made over 5 years ago. It was rather eye opening. I think I have come a long way. What is interesting is if, in 5 years, I were to look back on my posts now, I will find a different person again. AND that is definitely a good thing. How sad would it be to have not learned from my experiences? It would not only be sad but horrifying. I cannot imagine my life spent just existing in a whirlpool.
You mention I am direct. That is pretty accurate. I have become more so, as I discovered from reading my earlier posts as well.
I think about that a good bit, actually. Imagine me, thinking a lot, haha. I guess I am formulating my conclusions as to why that is. I think it comes down to this: I am a fixer and a teacher. I tend to use my experiences to help others. The way I got better, I figure is a good place to start. So I approach posts to others, initially, the same way. I start with what opened my eyes. Which was fully grasping that anxiety didn't involve just the mind but, also the body. That list I post all of the time was a revelation to me. Until I saw that list I only thought of the usual panic attack symptoms and I never really felt that fit with me, ya know? Of course that list wasn't a magic pill. I had lots of work to do, but it gave my mind permission to accept that my body WILL, absolutely, react physically to stress/anxiety. Once I climbed that hurdle, it freed my thinking. Which is when I began figuring out reactive habits and proactive habits. It helped my understanding of why anxiety develops, specifically with me, and later why, imo, in others. While I know everybody develops anxiety for varied reasons, we ALL have to understand how it affects us physically first to move to get to healing--at least, imo. Over time I found "supporting" people by reassuring over and over only made people worse. It wasn't support but enabling. I do struggle, at times, knowing when I can push though. I, occasionally, feel I've pushed too hard. Overall, though, pushing a bit is the best support.
I also am not an anxiety guru. However, after all of this time, I think, I have gotten fairly good at seeing which people, while frightened, are in a place to be open to information other than their BEASTYS and will, with time, get better and those who are just (as terrible it is) "comfortable" with the status quo. I don't have to like it but I have to respect that to some degree. When I find someone isn't in the right place, I tend to stop offering my opinion. I mean there is no need for me to post to someone who only wants reassurance.
well after all of that,
I agree with you. You and I are in the same boat.
I enjoyed your post/s. It touched on a great many truths. Hopefully your words will make a real difference for even one person here.
Good luck and be well