Chat Now!   Member Gallery    Member Articles    Games   Member Groups   Member Blogs   Health News    Wire  Bored?

Author Topic: Get caught up in thoughts?  (Read 192 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline 59Ballons

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 95
  • Country: us
  • Rec's: 2
  • Gender: Male
  • Personal text
    • Poke This Member
Get caught up in thoughts?
« on: July 12, 2014, 08:18:13 PM »
Does anybody else get caught up and start obsessing/panicking over their thoughts? For instance, today I was taking a walk around my neighborhood, and all of a sudden I looked at a tree and thought "wow, trees are really weird". Like how they just start growing and their trunk is sticking into the ground, and then they just live without consciousness and their only reason to live is just to re-seed and grow more trees. I started worrying over this instantly and I started to panic... but I managed to calm myself down relatively quickly by telling myself that it was just my anxiety.

Then, later in the day, I sat down outside and I started thinking about my anxiety... and then I just started freaking out because everything in my life has been learned by me... and everything I know is being affected by my anxiety. (Its hard to explain and sounds dumb but I get it). Then the thoughts of "life is pointless" "life is fake" "It's all a dream" started coming, and I felt extreme dread when I thought about the future and how pointless it is to continue living on. I had to drag myself out of this, and I felt pretty weak and lightheaded for the next fifteen minutes along with some mild derealization.

I guess that also I get freaked out and I get anxiety over the fact that I am ALIVE at a given moment. Like I'll be sitting somewhere and all of a sudden I'll realize like WHOA, I'M ALIVE! And the fact that I seem to *just* be realizing this gives me really bad dread because I feel like my whole life has been a lie. But it isn't.


********It's a self-fulfilling prophesy. The anxiety and dread that I feel when I think about living and how I will "continue to feel this anxiety the rest of my life" is self-fulfilling. Why? Because the anxiety that I am feeling is caused by those thoughts. In the future... the anxiety will be caused by the same thoughts. And if I am worried about feeling like this in the future, the only thing to fix this is to simply not over-think anymore.


I also feel trapped... but thats also a symptom of anxiety.


The depersonalization and fear of life itself has gone down significantly in the past few months.... now its just anxiety RESULTING from those thoughts. And it always goes away when I'm distracted.


Take Care
Bookmark and Share
Distraction is life's best remedy.

Offline Mairi

  • Full Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 177
  • Country: 00
  • Rec's: 1
  • Gender: Female
  • Personal text
    • Poke This Member
Re: Get caught up in thoughts?
« Reply #1 on: July 12, 2014, 08:56:38 PM »
This could almost be me talking. I feel like that all the time! I also get really freaked out when actually, truly I realise I'm alive-"I'm alive right now! And it is this moment right now! Why am I alive? This is so weird! Ahhh!" I have racing thoughts like you, too. I might just think "What if my mother dies today?" which turns into "I really hope she doesn't die today! What if she does? I think she will! Or what if she just suddenly disappears of the face of the planet?" and so on and so forth. And, oh, yes. Getting freaked out over normal, everyday objects, such as lamp posts. I suddenly was afraid of lamp posts once. They looked inhuman and strange, like robotic creatures with long necks. I felt like they were watching me... Am I making sense? I know it's weird.
Bookmark and Share

Offline 59Ballons

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 95
  • Country: us
  • Rec's: 2
  • Gender: Male
  • Personal text
    • Poke This Member
Re: Get caught up in thoughts?
« Reply #2 on: July 12, 2014, 09:53:01 PM »
No, you are making sense!! Definitely. Anxiety does some pretty weird stuff to our minds... I often get anxiety because I know I have anxiety. Also, thinking about my anxiety makes me feel anxious.  :spineyes: :spineyes: :spineyes: :question: :question: :question: Like I will be distracted from my obsessive thoughts for 15 minutes, and all of a sudden I will be JOLTED back into my anxiety world by thinking about my anxiety. But while I was distracted, time seemed to just fly by.


For instance: Looking back on a 15 minute car ride feeling distracted without anxiety, I won't seem to remember a thing. I was fully conscious while it happened, obviously, but looking back on it I don't remember specific things that happened.

Looking back on a 15 minute car ride feeling anxious with a heightened sense of alertness and feeling anxious about life itself, I will specifically remember seeing a yellow house, or a group of trees, and I will feel a sense of heavy dread when I think about those objects.

I think my anxiety has something to do with a heightened sense of alertness about my body... this was a big issue earlier a few months ago when I had Depersonalization and Derealization, followed by extreme self-awareness. I felt, and I feel way too aware of my own consciousness. This was all brought about by pondering life's existence and asking myself philosophical questions that sent me into a panic attack, and then depersonalization and derealization with anxiety... and now anxiety (along with some sporadic depersonalization and derealization).

The way anxiety makes me feel is this feeling of dread and dislike. Imagine you won a game of jeopardy on national TV... and you found out that the prize was a can of soup. Or if you just found out that you received an F on your final exam in college and you couldn't graduate.
Its this sinking feeling, and this dread feeling, and I often feel this way when I think about life itself. Its weird.


PHEW. That was a mouthful :laugh3: :laugh3: :laugh3: !!! Anyways, maybe somebody can relate to the above^ I'll continue to observe the similarities between Depersonalization, Derealization, A heightened sense of awareness, and anxiety, along with philosophical thoughts and obsessive questions.

Have a great day/night everybody!
Bookmark and Share
Distraction is life's best remedy.

Offline agonisingsoul

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 13
  • Country: es
  • Rec's: 0
  • Gender: Female
  • In the middle of the crisis
    • Poke This Member
Re: Get caught up in thoughts?
« Reply #3 on: July 13, 2014, 07:35:28 AM »
This is being my thought process the last weeks/months.
Bookmark and Share

Offline 59Ballons

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 95
  • Country: us
  • Rec's: 2
  • Gender: Male
  • Personal text
    • Poke This Member
Re: Get caught up in thoughts?
« Reply #4 on: July 13, 2014, 10:53:28 AM »
It's gotten etched into my mind now.. Like I get up in the morning and if I don't distract myself, I immediately start to feel trapped and anxious when I think about how I felt anxiety yesterday. But I suppose I really have nothing to worry about... I'm not physically sick (thank God), I have good friends and a loving family, I have a roof over my head, lots of stuff, I'm not starving, and I'm not in poverty. So I just need to get out of this unnecessary suffering.
Bookmark and Share
Distraction is life's best remedy.

Offline Hoosier_Student

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 29
  • Rec's: 0
  • Gender: Male
  • Personal text
    • Poke This Member
Re: Get caught up in thoughts?
« Reply #5 on: July 13, 2014, 04:20:21 PM »
Wow!  That type of thinking is exactly what I experienced when I had my first major anxiety episode.  I remember thinking about the concept of time and how it was so weird.  It really freaked me out for several months.  Only when I went back to school months later did the symptoms improve somewhat.  I guess all the focus on school work distracted me somewhat from my obsessive thinking.
Bookmark and Share

Offline 59Ballons

  • Jr. Member
  • **
  • Posts: 95
  • Country: us
  • Rec's: 2
  • Gender: Male
  • Personal text
    • Poke This Member
Re: Get caught up in thoughts?
« Reply #6 on: July 14, 2014, 12:24:29 PM »
Hoosier_Student:

I'm glad that the thoughts improved when you went back to school. I think the thoughts are bad for me because I'm on Summer Break. I also suspect that they will improve when I go back to school in a month and a half. It just sucks that my summer has been gruesome so far.. but its improving.

Bast of luck to you!
Bookmark and Share
Distraction is life's best remedy.

Offline Hoosier_Student

  • Newbie
  • *
  • Posts: 29
  • Rec's: 0
  • Gender: Male
  • Personal text
    • Poke This Member
Re: Get caught up in thoughts?
« Reply #7 on: July 14, 2014, 12:52:33 PM »
59Balloons:

Even though school can be boring at times, I'd rather be in class than doing nothing.  An idle mind is disaster for me.  My current episode of anxiety started in May when I had nothing to do for a month.  All my friends and classmates left town, but I was stuck in town because my wife had to work every day.  As a result, I ended up sitting on my butt for several days surfing the internet when I started to get anxious thoughts.
Bookmark and Share

Tags:
 

Related Topics

  Subject / Started by Replies Last post
6 Replies
764 Views
Last post January 08, 2010, 06:04:20 PM
by Cooler
5 Replies
303 Views
Last post November 30, 2012, 02:57:59 PM
by VeryScary
12 Replies
294 Views
Last post November 13, 2013, 12:50:07 PM
by CheekyMonkey
17 Replies
648 Views
Last post November 23, 2013, 09:13:39 AM
by jaqb
3 Replies
211 Views
Last post December 10, 2013, 05:43:55 AM
by japheree