Welcome to the forum. It is great to have you as a member. This is a wonderful place to get advice and support from people going through similar situations. The members here are very helpful. It is nice to know we are not alone.
I am sorry you are struggling so hard with depression. I think you are right about happiness and contentment coming from within. We can't be truly happy unless we are happy with ourselves. Do you do to therapy to deal with your issues? It might be a good idea to learn some tools to cope with the anxiety and the depression. I hope you can find some help and support here.
Feel free to explore the forum. There are lots of useful topics to read. Feel free to post and ask questions. If you have specific concerns or questions start a topic in the appropriate section to get the best feedback. There is also a chat room for members 18 years and older that you can access once you have made three meaningful posts in the forum.
Again welcome to our community.