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Author Topic: New and need all the support I can get  (Read 65 times)

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Offline KelliMC

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New and need all the support I can get
« on: May 28, 2014, 11:47:14 PM »
Hey everybody. New here I just need some kind of support. I really think I'm losing it. The last two months I've had really really bad anxiety. I'm diagnosed bipolar but have never had any issues with anxiety. I've been in the hospital 5 times in the last 2 months due to panic attacks. I was taking Wellbutrin and my therapist took me off that cause it's known to make anxiety worse. Currently taking lamictal, seroquil, and ativan (as needed). Well as needed has turned into twice a day.  I was on zoloft for years instead of Wellbutrin until the sexual side effects became a problem and I never had anxiety on it. I had my therapist write me a perscription to go back on it but I've been too scared to take it with all i have going on (teeth wise. Read below) because I know it can increase anxiety the first week or so. I'm currently being treated for a dental abscess.  And of course for days I've been worried about it going to my brain and heart and yadda yadda yadda. Went to the oral surgeon today said he didn't see any sign of an abscess but I have to have all 4 of my wisdom teeth out. Plus a 2nd molar. Then Proceeded to tell me because of the medicine I'm on the medicine to knock me out probably won't work all the way. Needless to say I cried through the entire appointment. Well I've been on a 10 day course of clindamycin for 6 days now. It has tore my stomach up and is leaving me with chest pains that my family is telling me it's just from gas. For some reason I can't believe that and every time I get these pains I have another panic attack. So it's turned into me terrified to take this antibiotic. It almost midnight I've only took it once instead of 3 times. Every time I take it I'm terrified my throat is closing up. All this anxiety started out of no where on my way to a vacation in Florida just got really dizzy and my heart started pounding cause I thought I used too much orajel. Then I was fine for a few days and one nights I got like a brain zap and got really dizzy. Almost paralyzing like. Ever since I get dizzy and my hands will tingle. I'll get one sides headaches on my right side. Ive had an MRI and everything was fine. I've been told this is anxiety. But it's still hard to swallow. I always feel like something's wrong with me. I'm convinced. I lost my mom last July from liver disease. I watched her go through 7 years of suffering and I watched her die. I don't know if that could have triggered any of this or what. But I'm just looking for some kind of support. I think my dad and fiancÚ are both tired of me. I get the "it's all In you're head" "you're fine just stop". I feel so alone cause they don't understand. My mom had anxiety really bad and I just wish she was here cause she's the only one who would understand. I'm a 23 female mommy of one who 2 months ago would leave the house to go to the store and not freak out about being alone. I love the outdoors, I'm an avid equestrian.  I live and breathe horses. I haven't ridden or been near a horse in over a month. Which is not me. I'm out with the horses every chance I get. Now I stay in my house. If I go somewhere I have to have someone with me. My fiancÚ does shift work. So when he works nights I sleep on his parents couch. I'm at rock bottom. I just want my life back. I can't keep living this way. I just need some kind of support.  :(
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Offline crikee57

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Re: New and need all the support I can get
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2014, 03:16:55 AM »
Hi Kelli,

Welcome to the forum.  It is great to have you as a member.  This is a wonderful place to get advice and support from people going through similar situations.  The members here are very helpful. It is nice to know we are not alone.

I am sorry to hear you are going through such a rough time.  Anxiety and the fears that go along with it can be very debilitating and limit things so much.  I have found though that facing the fears and pushing myself out of my comfort zone helps so much with the anxiety and let's me still do many of the things I like to and need to do.  As for the antibiotics, if you have already taken them for 6 days you need to finish out the 10 days.  Also if you have taken for 6 days you should be fine taking the rest.  The pain in your chest could be either gas, acid reflux, or just plain anxiety.  Many people here have the chest pains on a regular basis (myself included).  I hope you feel better soon and are able to get those teeth out.  This site has helped me so much in finding people who I can talk to and who understand what I cope with everyday.  I hope you can find that support and help here as well. 

Feel free to explore the forum.  There are lots of useful topics to read.  Feel free to post and ask questions.  If you have specific concerns or questions start a topic in the appropriate section to get the best feedback. There is also a chat room for members 18 years and older that you can access once you have made three meaningful posts in the forum. 

Again welcome to our community.
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It's not what's in front of us that stops us.  It's what's inside that holds us back.

Offline gaucho16

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Re: New and need all the support I can get
« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2014, 01:53:04 AM »
You remind me of myself! I am also 23 and have pretty bad anxiety issues. Also, like you I had a parent get really sick and nearly die and it set off a lot of health anxiety problems in me too. We can get through this!!
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