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Author Topic: People Phobia  (Read 189 times)

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Offline TyeDyedButterfly

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People Phobia
« on: May 19, 2014, 05:13:43 PM »
I am not sure I am posting this in the right spot or not if not I am sorry.

I have a strange phobia or maybe not I am not sure so here goes does anyone else deal with the phobia of making friends or trusting people I am scared of people honestly even online I have a very hard time and I don't even see them or meet them so why am I so scared of people and where I live is a small place but I feel scared to go out that someone will see me and think I look awful or I am dressed wrong or they may talk to me and I don't want to talk to them I am also afraid of germs that people carry it grosses me out when people are sick I am scared I will get what they got or who have they been near. ?

This is so hard to understand and I feel like no matter what I say to people it is never the correct way just like now me typing I am shaking because I just know someone is reading this and thinking she is an idiot and maybe I am I know I am not very smart .

I do know we that have anxiety and depression also being bi polar and more we are judged and misunderstood so I think it is stemming from these and many more things wrong with me but I used to love people and enjoy life now I want to stay hid and away from life .

I take meds yes and no I don't see a therapist but what kind do you get if you have tried many? I don't like to be laughed at or made fun of because I don't know when someone is teasing or being serious I just walk away or say something on the phone like I need to hang up then cry and worry for days or if online it happens I get physically sick.  I am trying very hard to just do the best I can but my best isn't getting me anywhere not sure I know what is the best.

Thanks for reading and replies would be greatly appreciated .
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: People Phobia
« Reply #1 on: May 20, 2014, 05:37:02 AM »
It would seem like you obsess over everything in your daily life. Take things apart. Bit by bit. Maybe play back the whole day over and over. Wondering if you done this right or done that right. People like this can also have a hard time around people. Saying the right things. Feeling they are been judged. Really most people probably don't even notice you. They are simply going about their day as per normal. It is just your mind thinking they have spotted you and might be talking about you. Might be looking at you. In faced with chat outside the house it would be a big struggle. Wanting to say the right things. To act in a certain way. When really you are doing just great. It is just your mind telling you other things. Therapy could help you out. Teaching how to be rational with your thinking and how to trust other people. Think about people on the net. People bug me on the net I can switch my computer off. They are gone. That is what the on off button is for. Bit of practice and you will be perfect.
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Offline TyeDyedButterfly

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Re: People Phobia
« Reply #2 on: May 20, 2014, 06:33:07 AM »
Thank you Cuchculan for replying and what you say does make sense but is it possible I am suffering also from Paranoia is that the same as a phobia?

I do know what you mean about the people online but I feel like if I shut them off does that make me a bad person or what will they think of me and I know people say they don't care what people think but in reality I do believe people do care what people think well I believe most actually do but then again it could my thinking and I also agree many do go by and don't think about others .

I agree on Therapy and I am going to find a Therapist but I am not sure what type to find or if they deal with every issue I have I did try therapy a few times and I am so ocd or phobic maybe paranoid but I feel like they just didn't get me so I stopped trying.

Thanks again and very wise words.
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Offline HalfMoonRun

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Re: People Phobia
« Reply #3 on: May 20, 2014, 05:04:33 PM »
I have many fears similar to what you're going through. I am very scared of people. I do not like to go anywhere alone because I am afraid that I am going to be murdered, raped, kidnapped, etc. I don't want to be a "victim" of a horrible crime and I think if I don't put myself in that situation that I can prevent it from ever happening. While I know that exercising good judgement when it comes to situations is important, I take it to an extreme level where I think everyone has a hidden motive. Even when I am at work I imagine a shooter coming in and opening fire on everyone. I also think of a co-worker snapping and stabbing me from behind with a pair of scissors.

Then when it comes to just normal interactions with people, I hate EVERYTHING I say to strangers. I can never be myself. And since I feel totally like a different person when I talk to someone I don't know well, I assume that they don't like me. What's to like? I'm awkward and quiet. It's very hard for me to get to know co-workers. I assume that girls hate me by default and they don't understand me, so I mostly talk to guys (which is often a problem with my boyfriend). I feel more comfortable with them and like they aren't judging me every second. I can be myself. I can talk about things that interest me without fear. Girls/women just freak me out. I don't trust them, either. I think they will backstab me at the drop of a hat. So I have very few actual friends...it's just me and my boyfriend.

People try to tell me that I need to stop worrying what other people think and I am being too hard on myself. People say that the things I think about myself are WAY worse than what other people think. And people tell me I need to be more outgoing and live my life. It's just really hard.  :(

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Offline TyeDyedButterfly

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Re: People Phobia
« Reply #4 on: May 21, 2014, 08:27:35 AM »
I don't work so I don't have to worry about people I work with but when I did work I was very ocd about my job and made fun of a lot over it but my bosses would pile more onto me because they knew I would get it done but also in the process they were laughing behind my back and also in my face because I was so ocd and other co workers would say things to me about my clothes always matching and my jewelry always matching my clothes and how I always ironed my clothes well I think if you are going to go too work at least look nice for the public don't look like a slob but it eventually wore me down and stressed me out . I didn't think it was funny at all and felt like I was the laughing stalk.

I am scared to leave in early mornings or at night in the dark so I just don't do it and I stay in my house with my doors locked and my phone is always with me and I have several security systems so I feel a little safer but I do think one day someone will break in on me when my husband is away.

I have a few good friends but do I trust anyone no not at all not even myself I just feel to messed up and I don't care to meet new people I would just worry about what to talk about or how I should look or how would I go places with them I used to enjoy going places but I don't anymore and I would rather shop alone when I can go so I can walk fast and get out . I have had a few friends get mad at me over my mental health problems but I can not make them understand.

Hope things get better for us !
Thanks for replying
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