Hi there! I am a former army wife and had to deal with several deployments before my hubby got out. Here are my coping techniques.
Keep busy! During one deployment I wrote a book in my spare time, during another I worked an extra part time job that was a lot of fun. (It was at a high end wine shop where I got paid to taste and learn about wine...what could be better!)
Friends are wonderful! If you are looking for insta buddies take up a hobby. I am a professional horse trainer so my students are my family. If you are pathetic join an adult soccer team or maybe take up riding ...sorry had to pitch my sport...or something along those lines. If working up a sweat isn't your thing then join a book club, knitting group, or take a ceramics class. All are great ways to meet people with similar interests.
Keep in touch! When my hubby was away ***** was our best friend. Even when he was on the other side of the planet knowing that he was just a phone/computer call away was a major source of comfort.
Now onto the anxiety management part....
Have you considered trying meds or therapy? Seeking help to manage your anxiety does not make you weak or a failure...it means you are a smart woman who is taking charge of her life.
Last but not least, tell your hubby about your feelings but do it the right way. Wait until he is home and you are in a good mental ***** then explain yourself using "I" phrases so he understands that you are not blaming him. Ex. "I feel very nervous when you are away, how do you think we can deal with that together?". Approach the problem as a team and I am sure you will conquer it. I have know my hubby since high school and we were best friends through having him stationed on the other side of the country, Alaska to be specific, and three deployments. Then we became romanticly involved, got married, and had to deal with another deployment. We made it through and I honestly feel that having to go it alone for a while made me a stronger person. You will make it too!
Good luck and hang in there!