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Author Topic: confession anxiety and sexual childhood  (Read 170 times)

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Offline nathanjh

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confession anxiety and sexual childhood
« on: April 30, 2014, 04:10:30 PM »
Let me start by saying my anxiety recently spiked due to me starting a relationship 2 weeks ago. As soon it started I developed confession anxiety and a need to constantly tell her everything but have been surpressing it. But now my brain has been focusing on my sexual childhood 10 and under if I remember correctly. I was a very sexual child even doing sexual exploration with girls and at one point thinking and talking about doing some stuff with my cousins thank god all that ever happen there was kissing and no sexual contact. I relise most of this is semi normal and none of the people involved were hurt by it. The problem is my brain is telling me I need to tell her about this and I don't think it nessisary since I was so young and we just started dating. I need help what should I do my anxiety is making things hard 
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Offline Potatoes

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Re: confession anxiety and sexual childhood
« Reply #1 on: April 30, 2014, 04:57:53 PM »
What has been encouraging to tell her this information? as if you feel guilty for your actions? At such a young age it's just part of growing up. I'm sure everyone goes through that in some type of way. I'm sure if you were to bring it up it'd be at an appropriate time to where she can fully understand what and where you're coming from or she might be confused on the message you're trying to pass through.

If you feel an absolute desire to share that information with her then there is nothing wrong with sitting down with her and entering the conversation about growing up. and have those topics pop up as the conversation progresses in my personal opinion.. That way you don't feel any awkwardness throwing things around and her wondering why you're telling her this stuff. I don't see anything wrong with expressing yourself especially if you feel the situation is needed. Nothing worse than bottling up something, it only makes you personally feel deceptive and unworthy of trust. Who knows, you could even benefit from getting that off your chest and she'll feel that you trust her with such sensitive information.

Best wishes.
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Offline nathanjh

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Re: confession anxiety and sexual childhood
« Reply #2 on: April 30, 2014, 05:43:43 PM »
My anxiety is the only reason I feel the need its been fixating on different things for the past 2 weeks some I've shared others I've kept to my self. I really don't wanna bring this up and never thought I'd have to seeing it has nothing to do with my life now. Do you think talking about this is nessasary
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Offline Potatoes

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Re: confession anxiety and sexual childhood
« Reply #3 on: April 30, 2014, 06:04:23 PM »
Well its "necessary"ness lies on your judgement my friend,

Has your anxiety given yourself any reasons as to why you need to tell her?

I like to lie on the personal rule of "Less is more". On certain things that have happened in the past... especially involving growing up I don't necessarily tend to express those kinds of things with others... not even with someone as close to a mother or a father. It really isn't much of touching ground for conversation if it is not regarding something that has happened currently.

I noticed you put this as a "confession" to her but what are you to confess? Everybody develops in their own way. I had known a LOT of sexually active youngsters that I was surrounded by when I before high school and people do what they shouldn't do but it's not to really be looked at as a "crime" so to speak. It might be that you feel some sort of guilt or something when you really shouldn't... I mean you were kids. You grow up. There is nothing to judge you on that, thus it's not something really worth expressing to someone else as others may take it shallowly.

If you do decide to speak with her, like I said before... just make sure the time is right and the conversation is headed in the direction of growing up and youth. Not that what you're talking about is inappropriate, but to make sure she is understanding where you're coming from instead of personally feeling awkward or worried. That way you don't come off wrong.
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Tags: sexual OCD anxiety GAD 
 

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