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Author Topic: everything feels "off," I feel stupid. Am I really losing it this time?  (Read 207 times)

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Offline bluecanary

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I woke up early yesterday, and things were bad right from the start. I've had anxiety for about ten years, and I thought I knew all my symptoms by heart. But this time it was different somehow. It's so hard to explain... I was looking around, and I felt like I didn't understand the world around me. Everything felt off somehow. I've felt like my vision was affected, like I couldn't see as well or focus my eyes to read. I'm do scared because I don't feel like me anymore. Everything I say or do, I ask myself, "Why did I say that? Why did I do that?" I also feel dumber somehow, like it takes me a minute to understand a question I'm asked, or if I read something, I have to read it twice because I read it wrong the first time. I'm so terrified by this, I swear I must be coming down with the youngest ever recorded case of Alzheimer's or something. I'll look at people passing by in traffic, and for whatever reason, I get terrified. I have no idea why. I don't think it's paranoia, because it's not as though I think everyone's out to hurt me or anything. It's just that I can look at anything, even an inanimate object, to "test" my reaction. More often than not, that reaction is fear. The wrist part of all of this is that I can't even put into words what's wrong most of the time. Am I crazy, or does anxiety really do all this?
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Offline Cuchculan

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Anxiety can you think about everything. Can make you check and double check things. With derealization you can get a sort of distorted view of the world. Were things don't seem real. You might have a touch of that. Mixed with other symptoms you never went through before. It is very easy to forget things when like this. Seems like you are obsessing a little bit too over everything you say and do. Very common to anxiety. Like you take everything you do in life and play it back over in your head again and again. Wondering if you said and done the right things. Nothing we haven't heard before from people. With some it can just pass. It can be just a phase. Might be good to keep a journal of your thoughts and actions. So you can read back over it all and see if you need to make any changes in your life. You might not see something there and then. But if you write it all down you will see it when you read back over your words. Then you will know where changes have to be made. Try and not worry as much. Anxiety can do all of this to people.
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Offline emmiesuz

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YEs.....I know how you feel.  I was JUST saying this yesterday to my friend.  It feelings like something is seriously wrong.  Its like part of you is anxious. Part of you is depressed.  Then these wacky thoughts jump in from a dream you had.  Just yesterday I thought "Are we going into summer or winter?" Yes, random people will scare me for no reason.  I go in and out of depersonalization.  Thats the really scary one.  It just feels like I am 'going crazy' in a weird non-specific way.....make sense? Like I'm not real, I can't process things, I dont understand simple things people explain to me....seriously, like getting directions to the nearest dunkin donuts, its like they are speaking Greek and I cant follow it.  I even went through a month of adult ADD testing.....no dice.  I guess its all anxiety, but I am ready to throw in the towel.  Im exhausted by it.  I cant take this anymore.

And honestly, when I need to, I feel normal.....work, important things, some recreation.....I'm present.  And there are times when I feel like I am sane, competent and reacting normally to everyday situations.....but then sometimes.....very very often....like half a day....I feel like a total nutter!!!
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