Divorce send his anger thru the roof...hmm...IF I were to go the usual route-with attorneys and claiming 1/2 of everything then yes it would. I however am planning it differently. I am planning to put aside the money I need to get a new place to live & the necessities I will need to care for my daughter & dogs. The rest, the house, everything, I am going to offer to him in lieu of his not forcing my daughter into doing the usual overnights until she is ready.
Backstory on this: my mother died when I was 28 of cancer so when my daughter was old enough to ask where my mommy is -we told her the truth, that she became very ill & died and went to Heaven. One time she was playing on the playground & met a little girl whose mother had become very sick & died at the hospital and so she had to move into her Grandma's house to live. These 2 things have had such an impact on my dd. When my dd was about 4 years old her Grandmother & I felt we may need to get her into sleepovers in case we ever needed to...long story short my dd was nearly inconsolable when bedtime came & she was not with me. So sleeping away from me is not really an option for my dd at this point in time. She's been scarred I feel by my losing my mother & her friend as well. She is afraid to be without me, afraid it means she will lose me maybe. We are working on this together, little by little I have gotten her to where she will at least go to the store with my husband without me and she's ok. But overnights? No..not healthy to force that upon her until she is ready to do it which in time I am sure she will be.
This is why I am saving my $ and am still there...so that I can be able to go without taking and fighting for anything.
This weekend was rough. I had family in the area visiting & it was important to me. My husband was rude. Quiet. Only friendly to those family members who are good at placating ppl like him. He even jumped in the drivers seat so that I couldn't drive on the way to see them. I have to hold my breath in hopes that he isnt mean to them( he has been many times in the past) It is nerve wracking. It isn't healthy for me or my daughter because she feels every single ounce of tension between us. I was talking with a friend the other day. I told her what I was talking about here-feeling like I'm bailing on my dd because I wont have to deal so much with him, she will...my friend said that overall looking at this-it's healthier to have the day to day peace in our lives and face the possibility that incidences like the one I spoke of happening again...it's an outside chance he'll do things like that. I feel like she's right. Day to day my daughter & I can live & grow in peace and when she's with him she can enjoy the father daughter relationship without the tension in the air there is now.