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Author Topic: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?  (Read 281 times)

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Offline deckeromega

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Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« on: April 06, 2014, 04:23:36 PM »
I'm very scared that I'm in the Prodormal Stage of Schizophrenia.  I am Hypersensitive and
and always checking the source of a sound.  I smell things that most  people don't, and
I'll go through a phase like an hour of Depression.  I want to know does this sound like
Schizophrenia, and if somebody thought that they had it would they even care that they had
it.  My Psychologist says I don't but I'm really afraid I do, I don't know what to do.
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Offline Alexk1989

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #1 on: April 06, 2014, 07:54:47 PM »
Everything your saying sounds anxiety driven and like you are seeking reassurance. You do not sound like you have Skitzo.
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Offline stephtronic

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #2 on: April 07, 2014, 12:27:32 AM »
You do not have schizophrenia.

You MUST start seriously dealing with this obsession with a therapist/psychiatrist. Reassurance seeking on this board is not helping you, especially if you do not believe anything anyone says to you. You need to talk to your parents about how bad this fear is or schedule an appointment yourself. You are wasting a precious time of your life worrying about something you needn't be.
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Offline Alexk1989

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #3 on: April 07, 2014, 07:47:41 AM »
Decker...as much as I tell you not to worry, you are worrying just like me. Just like me, about the same ***** as me, and even less then me. At the same time however deep down inside I really don't believe either of us have Skitzophrenia. As the lady above said, you need to deal with the anxiety and reassurance seeking. All my previous OCD concerns such as HIV...Brain Tumor...Heart, were easy to get over because you can get tested for these things. If Skitzo had a test we would both be negative and forget about it.


Both the shrinks I seen, one anxiety specialist, one skitzo specialist both said that their evaluations are the test. And trust me I've explained concerns exactly like yours and then some to them. They both said rest assured that you do not have skitzo.
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Offline deckeromega

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #4 on: April 07, 2014, 08:48:56 AM »
You do not have schizophrenia.

You MUST start seriously dealing with this obsession with a therapist/psychiatrist. Reassurance seeking on this board is not helping you, especially if you do not believe anything anyone says to you. You need to talk to your parents about how bad this fear is or schedule an appointment yourself. You are wasting a precious time of your life worrying about something you needn't be.

I did go back to my Psychologist and she said I am not Schizophrenic AT ALL.  But I cannot get my mind off of it.  I've literally become afraid
of the dark and being alone because I fear I'm going to lose it at that moment.  My Psychologist says just re frame my thoughts, and normalize.
That is way easier said than done.  I normalize my thoughts but in a  way it's still making me think about it.  When I do normalize and I'm
distracted or just distracted by something in general, the Anxiety is  always right there in the background on the surface waiting to explode.
This is so frustrating because I've had Anxiety in the past but I just  can't get over it.  Some points in my day it's almost like I've became
okay with the fact that I'm Schizophrenic even though everybody is telling me I'm not.  I feel crazy because nothing anybody is doing is 
helping.  Last night really freaked me out, I don't know if it was earworm(when you get a song stuck in your head) or what, but it sounded
like a witch laugh going over and over in my head.  Almost like a song playing over and over it scared the crap out of me and i'm not sure
if that was a hallucination or not. But, I apologize because you seem to be getting annoyed with me I just feel like I'm losing it and nobody believes me.  :(
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Offline StudentOfHope

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #5 on: April 07, 2014, 07:27:01 PM »
Hi Decker-

I've responded to one other post of yours.... I am by no means an expert, nor are others here on this message board.   But we are here to support one another.  You are not being annoying.  You are very scared, tired and frustrated and it comes out in your posts.  You're fighting hard, and that's the first thing you have to try and discontinue.

You'd mentioned that you are almost accepting of your possible fear, that there are times when you've accepted you are "crazy" and feel better.  That's exactly the point.  The absolute moment that people with severe obsessions give up trying to control their fears in one of the following ways:

Checking with people around them if they are crazy
Checking with people online if they sound crazy
Checking whether or not people around them heard x sound or saw x object move etc...
Asking for reassurance with your doctor as to your diagnosis

The minute you give those behaviors a time out (WHICH IS INCREDIBLY HARD TO DO!!! BELIEVE ME I KNOW!) you will feel better.  Your anxiety will begin to decrease as you are not feeding the survival mechanism in the brain that is ready to fight. 

Cheesus (on this message board) had experienced many of the same difficulties you are experiencing, and posted some extremely thoughtful posts (he's very intelligent) on the board.  If you perform a search for his name his posts will pull up.  I'd recommend you read them.

In the meantime, I can say I definitely empathize with you as I too have experienced all of the wacky sounds/thoughts/internal voice thoughts you have and I am still here, in a Masters degree program, working full time and have made it to today without going crazy or being schizophrenic- which has been my main fear for over a decade.

Although it may help you to hear that now, it will not help you to alleviate your anxiety in the long term.  Please look at Cognitive Behavioral Treatment and if you haven't already considered doing so- try asking for advice about taking an anti-anxiety class of medication called an SSRI.  For you for the time being, you may even consider a benzodiazepine with SSRI, depending on your current level of functioning/anxiety.    I am not a doctor, however, so it will be very important for you to consult with your doctor/GP or psychiatrist.

Best Wishes,
And I wish for you some peace.  I know how hard this can be.... I definitely understand your fears. 


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Offline deckeromega

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #6 on: April 07, 2014, 08:34:06 PM »
Hi Decker-

I've responded to one other post of yours.... I am by no means an expert, nor are others here on this message board.   But we are here to support one another.  You are not being annoying.  You are very scared, tired and frustrated and it comes out in your posts.  You're fighting hard, and that's the first thing you have to try and discontinue.

You'd mentioned that you are almost accepting of your possible fear, that there are times when you've accepted you are "crazy" and feel better.  That's exactly the point.  The absolute moment that people with severe obsessions give up trying to control their fears in one of the following ways:

Checking with people around them if they are crazy
Checking with people online if they sound crazy
Checking whether or not people around them heard x sound or saw x object move etc...
Asking for reassurance with your doctor as to your diagnosis

The minute you give those behaviors a time out (WHICH IS INCREDIBLY HARD TO DO!!! BELIEVE ME I KNOW!) you will feel better.  Your anxiety will begin to decrease as you are not feeding the survival mechanism in the brain that is ready to fight. 

Cheesus (on this message board) had experienced many of the same difficulties you are experiencing, and posted some extremely thoughtful posts (he's very intelligent) on the board.  If you perform a search for his name his posts will pull up.  I'd recommend you read them.

In the meantime, I can say I definitely empathize with you as I too have experienced all of the wacky sounds/thoughts/internal voice thoughts you have and I am still here, in a Masters degree program, working full time and have made it to today without going crazy or being schizophrenic- which has been my main fear for over a decade.

Although it may help you to hear that now, it will not help you to alleviate your anxiety in the long term.  Please look at Cognitive Behavioral Treatment and if you haven't already considered doing so- try asking for advice about taking an anti-anxiety class of medication called an SSRI.  For you for the time being, you may even consider a benzodiazepine with SSRI, depending on your current level of functioning/anxiety.    I am not a doctor, however, so it will be very important for you to consult with your doctor/GP or psychiatrist.

Best Wishes,
And I wish for you some peace.  I know how hard this can be.... I definitely understand your fears.

Thank you so much for the reply I really appreciate it.  This is one of the most sympathetic and thoughtful reply I think
I've received so far, it is greatly appreciated.  I am on Wellbutrin I guess it's and Anti-Depressant with Anxiety reducing
properties?/.  I've been on it for about a week and half now and I think it's starting to help a little bit.  At first it made my
Anxiety horrible(physically).  That seems to have gone away now and I'm just stuck on rumination.  I've been seeing a
Psychologist and I think what we're doing is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.  She's teaching me to re frame/normalize my                                                                                                               Anxious thoughts and picture a happy place.  The stuff she has me do feels quite childish actually.  She made me draw a                                                                                                               box, decide how big it is what it's made of and "defense mechanisms."  So, I basically imagine my Anxious thoughts as this                                                                                                         nasty goo and imagine it going into my building sized steel box with a force field and lasers.  It's very childish and it doesn't                                                                                                        really help, the re framing does to an extent but once I'm worked up there's no calming my mind.  She also said I should
avoid these forums, but I just can't I start freaking out having nobody to empathize with, I feel so alone.  At least on here
there are some people in the same boat. 
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Offline deckeromega

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #7 on: April 07, 2014, 09:21:26 PM »
I don't know why my post turned out so weird just try and read it.  I'll re post it if you need me to.
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Offline StudentOfHope

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #8 on: April 08, 2014, 01:54:40 PM »

I am glad you feel somewhat better after seeing your doc/starting wellbutrin... and believe me I know exactly what you mean when you say that this board
helps you to know you're not alone. 

Like you, my doc also suggests I avoid the board when I feel I am "checking" to see whether anyone else is experiencing the same things as I am, for fear that if they
are not, then it means I am crazy or starting to lose my mind.  So, again, I can tell you I know exactly how you feel!

You're doing all of the right things- seeking treatment, trying an SSRI (Wellbutrin) and you're doing the best you can do.  I don't mean that in a childish way, I mean this because
I know how hard it can be, and that it will get way better at times, and honestly, there will be times where it gets pretty hard again.  This is just the nature of the disorder.

The Wellbutrin or any class of SSRI drugs definitely make people more anxious when starting out, so try to fight through it as much as possible.  After 4-6 weeks you should feel even better than you are feeling now.  And, you'll be able to do more of the CBT work you are already doing.

Again- best wishes towards feeling better!! 
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Offline Alexk1989

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #9 on: April 09, 2014, 01:00:17 PM »
Looking stuff up is really a double edge sword.

I could tell you this though, do not go looking up symptoms but, as for finding people that relate on here, is helpful to me.

Also from experience it is extremely amazing how real and dooming some "symptoms" may seem when you obssess about them. They almost seem as they will not go away.

On the other side of things when you stop obsessing over one symptom and move on to the next, the former almost disappears. You have to acknowledge these little signs which in fact do say these "symptoms" are given life and power by our anxiety and thoughts.
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Offline Daisy55

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Re: Would Schizophrenics even care if they had it?
« Reply #10 on: April 09, 2014, 01:31:58 PM »
My mother in law is schizo. for over 40 years now in her mid 80's.  I don't think she really cares or realizes much about it.
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You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.  
John 8:32

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