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Author Topic: Feeling depressed..  (Read 129 times)

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Offline _rai

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Feeling depressed..
« on: March 16, 2014, 03:06:19 PM »
I just got a new job. My husband use to work for us before. Then, I wanted to work too. So I got a job. And it caused me and my husband some emotional problems, like he goes to work at 4am and I go to work at 11am and he goes home at 2pm and I go home at 10pm. We only see each other at night whenever we go to sleep.
After a few weeks of this schedule I felt depressed. I am missing him. He is all I got. I love him so much. Just now we fought and I feel so sad he said we
Should just break up because I cry all the time
And he just makes me sad. I am so depressed I cutted my self. And he saw the cuts I made he told me that people who cut themselves are crazy people. I felt soo hurt.. It hurts me so much for
My husband to tell me these things. He has been tired now, its 3am i dont know what to do to us and our relationship. Should I let him break up
With me? I need matured answers :( i am so depressed!
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She didn't know who would leave or stay. So she pushed them all away.

Offline kconnors

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Re: Feeling depressed..
« Reply #1 on: March 16, 2014, 04:39:25 PM »
Well, I don't know how mature I am but my first instinct is to tell both you and your husband not to make any decisions because you are both very tired, very upset, and probably more angry at the situation than at each other but you don't know how to sit down and talk . . . the emotions are getting ahead of you . . .

You need some professional help if you are cutting yourself . . . he is reacting because he is just too tired to choose his words carefully . . . .it's also time for both of you to have some couple counselling . . .

Really, this is not the time to make decisions . . . and no one here would presume to recommend whether or not you break up with him . . . that has to be a decision that you make . . .

You and your husband need to book time to sit down and decide on what to do as a couple . . . you need, though, immediate support and counselling to manage your depression and anxiety and to help guide you . . . .

You are hurt; your husband is hurt . . . perhaps he did not want you to go to work because he only sees you when you are tired . . .perhaps your anxiety and depression are being triggered by the emotional issues that have not been resolved between you and your husband . . .

So, ___rai, do consider some professional help and even though we cannot make the decision for you, please check in with us and let us know how you and your husband are doing . . .take care, kc
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Offline Billiam

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Re: Feeling depressed..
« Reply #2 on: March 16, 2014, 04:43:39 PM »
So sorry your going through this. Like stated above I wouldn't make any decisions at this moment! But I would seek a professional! I know it's hard and he might not quite understand what your going through inside! But I am sending prayers your way!! Keep your head up and stay strong! Idk if you believe in the man upstairs but if you do don't lose your faith!
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Offline Potatoes

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Re: Feeling depressed..
« Reply #3 on: March 16, 2014, 04:52:04 PM »
I just got a new job. My husband use to work for us before. Then, I wanted to work too. So I got a job. And it caused me and my husband some emotional problems, like he goes to work at 4am and I go to work at 11am and he goes home at 2pm and I go home at 10pm. We only see each other at night whenever we go to sleep.

Work has got to be high on the list of marital/relationship problems, that needs to be understood... It's hard to find a job that works on the same schedule at the same time trying to be mutual with our significant other... But you can't be king of the world if you're slave to the grind either.

After a few weeks of this schedule I felt depressed. I am missing him. He is all I got. I love him so much. Just now we fought and I feel so sad he said we
Should just break up because I cry all the time
And he just makes me sad. I am so depressed I cutted my self. And he saw the cuts I made he told me that people who cut themselves are crazy people.

It's understandable for people to not see things from your point of view. How long have you two been together? he has absolute NO right to talk to you like that or make speculations like that. I understand things are rough, but it is no excuse to be outright rude. Those comments are unnecessary and obviously said out of personal conflict. It's not constructive criticism, it's judgement. He should not give up on you like this, that's not the path of a true partner should ever take.

You need to weigh out your options here. How badly do you need this job? Is this a career that you are seeking? or is it flexible enough to reconsider? You've got a lot on your plate, but I don't think you should inflict self-harm for what has been done.


I felt soo hurt.. It hurts me so much for
My husband to tell me these things. He has been tired now, its 3am i dont know what to do to us and our relationship. Should I let him break up
With me? I need matured answers :( i am so depressed!


In order to have a bridge of a relationship.... your 100% effort is only 50% of the bridge. If he isn't putting forth his efforts then the bridge isn't completed. it's not your fault, you shouldn't let it beat you up. it's so tough but even though you reach out and give it your all, you still have to make sure that your personal health and personal comfort is priority. I'm sure things will pan out, but you've just got to give it time. If you don't want to break things up with him, then you should avoid saying things that would trigger it or give off the vibe that that's the path that you want to take. You need to sit down and talk with him, regardless of the time. If he loves you he will understand... If you don't see him until 2am then so be it, talk it out. Don't let one step on your toes, or they'll walk all over you. be assertive but not aggressive. Find out how he REALLY feels.


Best wishes to you two.
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