Haven't been here is a while. Some history; I am 53 years old and had panic attacks at 17 yrs old. on and off for some years and then in my late 20s I went through CBT for a few months. The results were wonderful and I forgot about the panic and anxiety. Never really had another panic attack until a year ago but for the past few years I have had GAD and some worry of health.
15 months ago I wake up with terrible pain in my neck. I can't move my my neck without extreme pain. Headaches, eye pain, and extreme anxiety. I go to emergency and my Blood pressure is real high so they give me 2 BP meds plus a pain killer. Then I begin fearing I have a blood clot in my brain/ spine and begin freaking out over this and my BP. After a week my pain is still bad and I get steroid shots in my neck. This freaks me out worse. My anxiety is climbing. My doc puts me on Busbar and now am taking 2 BP meds plus this. Go back to the doctor because of the pain and doc gives me a shot of Morphine and I freak out and think I am dying.
Go to the Pdoc and he gives me xanax. I start taking this and am worse. I begin having crying breakdowns and feel like dying. I have never ever been depressed in my life but now crying all day. I go back to the doc and he gives me Lexapro to add. From the moment I start on this I feel the anxiety increase more. As I increase my dosage I am in such bad shape. Cant drive from the panic, burning arms and chest, all kinds of strange things.
Still crying all the time and I decide to stop the xanax. after 2 of 3 months I stop the xanax and am up to 15 mg of lexapro. Slowly over the months and months my anxiety get a bit better and I can drive again and much of the bad anxiety stuff leaves. After a few months of Physical Therapy my neck pain goes from a level 8 to about a 3. Then I herniate a disk in my back and go through a few more months of therapy
My anxiety seems pretty low now but I have all kinds of strange things going on and most of the times I am convinced it is from the Lexapro. I am tired all the time. If I am not extremely busy i will fall asleep in the middle of the afternoon. It is like a constant stressor to just stay awake and focused. I have constant restless leg issues and cramping. It is really distressing and while i am so tired when I lye down my legs spasm and ache. Also My constant jaw clenching and grinding. I just before yawned and pulled a muscle in my jaw. dam the pain and cant open my mouth. I just feel like my body is in constant tension but with no panic attacks. It is odd. Then I get dizzy a lot. or more like light headed. One day I feel good the next I feel terrible with one of these things. My Pdoc tells me these are not from the Lexapro but I dont believe him.
I want to quit the lexapro but dont want to get back in a bad state. I am scared and feel stuck in a drugged state. I dont know if these things I feel are anxiety or anxiety/side effects from the Lexapro. My doc tells me to increase the dosage but I really feel this will make me worse. or maybe i am just confused and mistaken and an increase will make me feel great but I dont want to take the chance.
Any advice from someone that has been here would be helpful. Thanks