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Author Topic: Pregnancy advice please...  (Read 184 times)

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Offline Brooke2288

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Pregnancy advice please...
« on: February 28, 2014, 02:30:40 PM »
I am currently 32 weeks pregnant with twin girls. My husband and I are both 25 years old and this is my first pregnancy. My doctors want me to get to 36 weeks before having these babies. That's typically the goal for twins. I'm having a really hard time with these last few weeks I have left. My body is in so much pain that I can barely move from the couch. My joints hurt so bad, especially my feet and knees. I yell in pain every time I get up or sit down because it hurts so bad, and I have Braxton-hicks contractions frequently. Luckily I have not been put on bed rest, but I might as well be. My doctor did have me cut my hours at work to only 4 hours a day. I'm very anxious about all of this. I feel depressed now that I have to depend on everyone to do things for me, I'm anxious about giving birth (will probably have a C-section), and being in the house so much and not being able to do things has really got me down. I cannot wait to have my girls so that my body will feel halfway normal again, but I am very concerned about my mental health when they arrive. I'm worried that my health anxiety will spin out of control because I have two little ones depending on me, and I worry that I will become depressed caring for two babies at once. We do have a lot of help...both our parents live close by, but it's still very overwhelming. I have a lot of pressure from my husband and sister in law to breastfeed as long as I can. I plan to breastfeed, but I know it will be difficult with two babies. I will attempt it as long as I can, but if it consumes my entire life, I'm not producing enough, spending every waking minute pumping, or it makes me depressed, I plan to switch to formula and I don't want anyone lecturing me to do otherwise when they are not in my shoes. I'm just trying to get through these last 4 weeks or so without losing my mind. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.  ::)
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Offline bellabee

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Re: Pregnancy advice please...
« Reply #1 on: February 28, 2014, 02:53:37 PM »
The birth will happen and you will be ok.  you will earn your mom wings.

Having 2 babies is hard but you will have help.  I had one with NO help.  It was hard but it was AMAZING.  Your heart will Swell so big with LOVE that the love will pull you through.  Every month will get easier.. I promise.  I have 2 kids and they are a blessing from God.  They are what pulls me through every bad thing that I can not handle.  They are what keeps me grounded.

Just sleep whenever someone is helping you with the babies.  let them help with the cooking and cleaning too so you can enjoy each baby. 

Every mom has a little mental breakdown being sleep deprived but the babies are ok and mom is ok eventually too.  You will be ok and you will be a mom when its all said and done and you will be just fine :)

My friend on ***** keeps posting pictures of her with her TRIPPLETS.  I am sure she is exausted but she is smiling with pride and love in each pic :)
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Offline bpadilla49

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Re: Pregnancy advice please...
« Reply #2 on: February 28, 2014, 03:52:55 PM »
Hey girl,

I remember talking to you on previous posts when you were worried about lymphoma. I feel your pain. I want you to know that I'm a doula - meaning I assist mamas during pregnancy, labor, delivery, and post partum. I HIGHLY suggest hiring a post partum doula, ESPECIALLY since you're going to have a c-section and twins. You can google "doula + your zip code" and see what turns up.

I want to reassure you that all of these feelings are normal toward the end of your pregnancy. It's normal to have the physical pain, as well as the mental worry/depression.

As far as the breastfeeding goes, take it one day at a time. Heck, take it one FEEDING at a time! I'm a doula, and the longest I breastfed either of my children was 3.5 months. (that's almost unheard of as far as doulas go). Don't let anyone pressure you into ANYTHING! This is your body, and you're the primary caretaker for these precious little babies!!! If formula feeding seems like the way to go, DO IT!!! And don't let anyone make you feel guilty for it. Will it add extra cost? Of course. But to me, it was worth it for my own sanity.

I nursed my son for literally one week, and pumped for another 3, and finally switched him to formula. Let me tell you what a world of difference it made! I was finally able to bond with him without worrying if he was getting enough milk, or if my supply was up, or worrying about my cracked, aching nipples. lol. And with my daughter, I made it to 3.5 months and I finally said that I needed time to myself and allowence to have a drink without freaking out that it will get into the milk supply. haha. Selfish? Maybe to some. But it did wonders and really allowed me to bond with my children more.

Bottom line: I hate to break it to you - but you're entering a whole new world of judgement when you become a mommy for the first time. EVERY LITTLE DECISION you make will be judged by other moms. You can let it get to you (which I did for a while) or you can brush it off. In the end, only you know whats best for you and your children - more then even your husband, but ESPECIALLY more than other moms.

I'm here if you need to message me. I've been in your shoes. Just always remember - YOU'RE NOT A FAILURE!
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Offline rileybug

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Re: Pregnancy advice please...
« Reply #3 on: February 28, 2014, 04:05:46 PM »
Dont let your husband/sisterlaw bug you about breast feeding-talk to doc now-and get them on board to support whatever your decision is.  They're more likely to listen to doc if there is a problem later.  Less anxiety if you and doc have dicussed it.Goo``d luck-try and relax till the babies are born.
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Offline Brooke2288

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Re: Pregnancy advice please...
« Reply #4 on: March 01, 2014, 09:48:06 AM »
Thank you for all of your replies. I know my anxiety is amped up right now because of how soon these babies will be here. Every dream I have at night is about the babies. Some good, some bad. I'm getting out of the house today because my husband and I are going to finish getting everything off our registry that we didn't get at the shower. It will have to be a very quick shopping trip since my feet swell up so fast after being on them too much! bpadilla, Your advice is very helpful and it sounds like you have a lot of experience with all of this. I might be messaging you sometime  :happy0151:
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Offline bpadilla49

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Re: Pregnancy advice please...
« Reply #5 on: March 01, 2014, 02:14:08 PM »
Anytime! I'm usually on here multiple times throughout the day.
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Offline Brooke2288

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Re: Pregnancy advice please...
« Reply #6 on: March 02, 2014, 06:36:22 PM »
Thanks so much! There's definitely a lot going on in my life right now between my pregnancy and health anxiety so it's good to have people to talk to!
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