my pdoc said that valium and klon were cross tolerant, which I took to mean, I would feel no diff transferring btw the 2. Is that so? Did I just have the dose of valium wrong?
Yes, they are. They both hit exactly the anxiety related same binding sites in the same way, though diazepam was probably also hitting those associated with sedation to some degree. Tolerance to this usually builds up fairly quickly.
There dose of the two was about right at 0.25mg Klonopin and 5mg Valium, though people vary in their reactions to the different BZDs, so maybe a milligram more, or less of Valium may have been better, however, most adapt to such small variations within a few days.
I wonder whether at least part of the difficulty you had was psychological, perhaps triggered by this:
She said she would prefer that I just take 5mg valium or try 7 1/2mg rather than 10, but if I need it, to go to 10mg. She feels that 10mg valium will feel too strong to me.
anxious minds have a way of picking up such statements and using them against us.
To put dosing into perspective, Klonopin was developed as a high potency replacement for Valium because epileptics were having to take up to 200mg/day, sometimes even much more. Swallowing 20+ 10mg tablets every day soon loses its appeal, and gets expensive.