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Author Topic: Dreams and Disappointment  (Read 354 times)

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Offline BeeDot

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Dreams and Disappointment
« on: February 12, 2014, 03:46:31 PM »
I have been at my office for a year now (9 months as an intern, 3 as the office manager) and I am ready to leave.  I live in Austin, TX, which I am sure is a lovely place, but I grew up in Dallas and I have a great desire to see so much more of the world.

Here's the trouble:
1. I've only had this job for a few months and I'm afraid my employers will hate me for bailing so soon.
2. I am the office manager for a film production company.  While I just work in the office and have nothing to do with the actual film really, I am still in my dream industry.  I have always wanted to work in film and here I am.  Sadly, it has let me down a bit.  I find that everyone is in a bad mood, they only care about the bottom line, everyone hates our writer/director even though he is a big name in the industry and we should feel lucky to work with him.  I hate working in such a negative environment. 

Is the whole adult world like this?  Am I going to be continually disappointed by humanity and their insistence on focusing solely on the business of everything and not the art and the beauty of it?  I know I sound like a hippie, but I'm really not, I just thought film was going to be a more positive environment.

Part of me wants to just up a move, explore the world and get the most out of my life.  Part of me is afraid that that is incredibly selfish because there are so many people in the world who don't have the same opportunities as I do.  I am realistic.  I know I need to work for a living and I WANT to work.  I"m not lazy or anything like that.  But am I being selfish by leaving a job I only just started to go and chase my dreams even if I have no idea whey they will lead me?

Anyway, this is rambling, but I'm just wondering what you all might have to say because I need to get out of this circus in my head. 

[EDIT]: I don't want to sound like a brat.  Like a 24 year old who just hasn't grown up yet.  I understand there are responsibilities to adult life, but I am not married (or even in a relationship) don't have kids, no one depends on me for support.  Must I accept the daily 9-7 grind behind a computer screen just because "that's what responsible adults do." ?  I have good savings in my bank account, I understand the need to work and support myself (which I do now) but I'm just not sure I can accept that my life amounts to buying groceries for the office and scheduling travel for people who can't make up their mind when they want to come home.
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Offline christina10778

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Re: Dreams and Disappointment
« Reply #1 on: February 15, 2014, 09:42:07 PM »
Hey BeeDot  :bigsmile:
I just read this and I hope all is well....

By the way, I was in San Marcus, TX this morning dropping my sister and niece off at the train station....
My mother and I tried to go Gil's Broiler & Manske Bakery to get their famous "Manske Roll", but they were closed, lol  :(
And I'm from the DFW area and have been in a small town called "Beeville" for the past 3 years....
I am so ready to go back and, God willing, we will be back home by June of this year.....maybe sooner  ;D

But, I wanted to let you know that I know all to well how you feel.
Difference is I have a family and obligations.
My personal advice to you would be, "Follow your dreams, go with your heart, and never regret anything."
You have no obligations and nothing holding you back.
You have opportunities and many doors open for you right now....take advantage.
There is nothing selfish about your dreams.
Especially when you have no ties to anyone or anything.

In my past, I have given up so many dreams and goals for the comfort of others and I do regret it.
Now, Iím following my dreams and pursuing my goals but itís so much harder with a family and I wish I had done it earlier in life.
Traveling the world is a huge dream of mine, too.
And I plan on starting that dream soonÖ..

But you have to realize that there are going to be negative people around you no matter where you go.
Just smile and donít let them bring you down.
You canít control or change other people but you can control yourself and how you do and see things.
Stay positive and keep your dreams alive no matter what gets thrown in your path.
It isnít the person who never falls or never has obstacles thrown in their way that makes itÖ.that is not realisticÖbut, itís the person who gets back up, never stays down and knows how to always through those obstacles that makes it.

Be that personÖ.
Make every step you make in life be one step closer to your dreams.
See the world.
Meet new people.
Explore new places and cultures.
You will not regret itÖ..

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Offline Vigilance

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Re: Dreams and Disappointment
« Reply #2 on: February 17, 2014, 04:59:07 PM »
I would think the film industry would be hard to break into.  Do you think leaving this job will affect your employment in the field down the road?   A third option could be sticking it out for at least a year, to gain experience then maybe take time off.

Like the above poster said, you're going to run into negative people wherever you work - such has been my experience!  At least your positivity and idealism are helping balance the scales!

That said, if you have the ability to live your dreams without restriction or penalty, then by all means, I'd do it!  Might as well enjoy life while you're young and healthy.
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Offline anxiousartist

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Re: Dreams and Disappointment
« Reply #3 on: February 20, 2014, 08:01:40 PM »
I worked as a production assistant on a commercial and I experienced the same things you do on your job. Admittedly a 'PA' is the low man on the totem pole, my sister was the producer, she is from NY, and the rest of the crew were local canadians, so that may go a long way towards explaining my experience, but it was one of the worst working experiences of my life. So maybe that is the norm in film production, IDK.

I know I'm happiest when I'm working alone, I'm happiest when I'm in the most control of my own destiny, I'm happiest when I'm judged based on my work, I'm happiest when there are creative components to what I'm doing, I'm happiest when I'm busy... among other things. So I'm trying to create a job that fulfills as many of those things as possible...
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