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Author Topic: is this schizophrenia?!?  (Read 514 times)

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Offline Billy33

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is this schizophrenia?!?
« on: February 06, 2014, 06:08:49 PM »
I continue to search for answers for my many issues. I was diagnosed with gad and depression. I have been actively involved in cbt for almost three years now and still don't feel that I'm getting the help I need. It doesn't help that I'm terrified that if i tell anyone everything that goes on in my head that they will send in the guys in the white coats. I have extremely critical and angry "voices" in my head that seem to provide a negative play by play of my every move.. Sometimes to the point of making me believe thatpeople are mad at me when they're not . I have no friends, I got divorced a little over a year ago and have lived in my parents attic and haven't developed any new relationships. I also don't have any interest in developing any. I have experienced suicidal thoughts and actions in the past. There is certainly a part of me that's terrified of death and so far has kept me from going through with it. I have no interest in hurting others (thank God!). So what do you guys think?
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Offline GeoDude

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Re: is this schizophrenia?!?
« Reply #1 on: February 06, 2014, 10:07:18 PM »
Trust me I've conquered this fear before, so I know exactly how you feel right now. Furthermore, I would like to fully explain you that you do not have schizophrenia because a person that has it would not be question their, because they actually believe that they are hearing them.  I guess in a weird kind of way, you questioning yourself is a good thing, if you want to look on the bright side, but i digress.  To me all of this sounds like an anxiety thing and how you're just obsessing about it.

This thread has really helped me when I was fearing schizophrenia too
 http://www.anxietyzone.com/index.php/topic,51517.0.html

If you need any help, feel free to send me a PM
Take Care
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Offline Billy33

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Re: is this schizophrenia?!?
« Reply #2 on: February 07, 2014, 04:58:57 AM »
Thanks for the reply. I read through the post and it was interesting, but my symptoms seem more involved. I experience several voices. Mostly they're kinda like having sports commentators doing a play by play on my life but instead of doing highlights, they are very critical and convince me that everything I'm doing is wrong and that I'm going to get yelled at for it or punished for it even if it's exactly what I'm suppose to be doing! It's awful to go through this day after day.
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Offline SnowBunny54

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Re: is this schizophrenia?!?
« Reply #3 on: February 18, 2014, 01:45:36 PM »
Does anyone in your family have this disorder? Because a few of my family members do...I fear this too...but most lilely you're just worrying yourself into a frenzy though  I'm not doc...you should see one just in case! And take these other peoples adivce they've been through excatly what you're going through now!!!  :winking0008:
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Offline christina10778

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Re: is this schizophrenia?!?
« Reply #4 on: February 18, 2014, 06:01:23 PM »
After 2 years of doctors, psychiatrist, and medications, they are telling us that my niece might have Schizophrenia.
You do not have it....believe me.
Like one of the above posters stated, you wouldn't be questioning if you have it if you actually had it.

You could be Bi-Polar, though.
There is a Bi-Polar 1 and a Bi-Polar 2.....and with one of them you hear voices and even hallucinate.

And me, myself, am afraid to tell people everything that's in my head, too.
I swear that I would be locked up....
As a matter of fact, I made a video about these thoughts and our (anxiety sufferers) fear of having a horrible mental illness, about a week ago, that I was supposed to post on my Youtube Channel (Living with Health Anxiety)...but I chickened out.
I'm thinking of forcing myself to post it anyway because I think it would help people like you and me to know that they are not crazy or alone....

But, I have had the issues with talking myself into believing that people are mad at me, hate me, think I'm disgusting, etc.
I also have heard voices, talked out loud to myself without realizing it (conversations), had the most horrifying and terrible thoughts (like randomly thinking of stabbing a stranger on the street), and have even had hallucinations....many, many hallucinations.
....I would never actually do any of the awful things that pop in my head....but they still pop in there.
And, they seem to come around more often and get worse when I'm under a great deal of stress.

Most of my uncles, aunts, and cousins all have the same issues as me when they are under a lot of stress and they are all normal everyday awesome people.
About two months ago one of my uncles sent me a message because he was under a lot of stress and had been seeing "demons" and hearing voices.

Whenever we are under high amounts of stress we will begin to see shadows, hear noises, hear voices, etc.

But, I think it is our minds way of handling stress and because of our crazy imaginations it turns into these things.

I remember calling my sister at like 2:00am one time because I was lying in my bed in complete darkness, totally convinced that there was something in my closet and I wanted to get up to close the closet door so that I would feel better but I was seriously convinced that there was something under my bed waiting to grab my legs as soon as I put my feet on the floor. Then, as my room was at the top of the stairs, I swore the “Grudge Girl” was sliding up the stairs at that very moment, lol. I laugh at myself, but it was terrifying at the time. I wanted to just cry....plus, I couldn't get out of the extreme fear I was feeling. And I was already 30 years old when this happened, lol.

But, even more recently, I was going through a whole lot of extreme stress and anxiety and I was lying in my bed and noticed that I was seeing shadow figures again. And I even saw this huge demon looking creature with long arms and claws walk slowly by my door.
I quickly closed my eyes and I wouldn’t open them again because I thought it would be closer to me..…I just ended up falling asleep.

I know that it’s all in my head, that it’s not real and that it happens when I’m under a great deal of stress. So, basically, I have learned to deal with it, ignore it, or control it. It really doesn’t bother me as much anymore because I know what it is, what’s causing it, and that it will go away.
But, that's how I know that I don't have a serious mental illness.....I can control it.

You will be fine...you're just depressed.....
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My Health Anxiety Channel: http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8-5ZQ6ZyRtI4ccjpE_4QwQ/videos

1 Peter 5:7 - "casting all of your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you."

Offline christina10778

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Re: is this schizophrenia?!?
« Reply #5 on: February 18, 2014, 06:10:25 PM »
Oh, and I've been to a few psychiatrists and they have all told me that I am perfectly fine.....
The last one I saw wouldn't even try to put me on meds because I didn't need them....so he said, lol.
...I wouldn't have taken them anyway, lol.

And, just to give you some peace of mind, high amounts of certain supplements...Niacin, Ester-C, etc....have been proven to completely cure or greatly lessen Schizophrenia.

There are some nutrient/vitamin deficiencies that can actually cause mental illness....always check those levels before running to meds.   
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My Health Anxiety Channel: http://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8-5ZQ6ZyRtI4ccjpE_4QwQ/videos

1 Peter 5:7 - "casting all of your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you."

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