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Author Topic: I am new and think I have an anxiety about cancer  (Read 118 times)

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Offline everette

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I am new and think I have an anxiety about cancer
« on: February 01, 2014, 03:26:03 PM »
Hello all
I am male, 48 years old.  I have read a lot here and came across a post that sounds like me so I thought I should join the site.

Just before Christmas I noticed that I had lost 4 or 5 pounds. So I started searching for unexplained weight loss and I guess you can imagine what it found.
So my mind went in to panic mode and I started searching every type of cancer and symptoms known.
I had no other symptoms so I went with the few that do not show symptoms early. I convinced myself that I had colon cancer.

But one thing that I had not considered was that I used to stay up late at night and would eat whatever was left over from supper/diner and if there was nothing left I would eat something else like a few p & j sandwiches. I was eating from 350 to over 500 calories late at night.
In early November we had someone start doing some work on our house and he worked 7 days a week until just after Christmas. So I started to going to bed earlier so that I could try and help as much as I could. By going to bed early I was no longer eating all of does calories. I calculated the amount of calories that I had taken away by the amount of weeks and it came up to weight that I had lost.
So there I had my answer to my weight loss. But my mind was already set and in panic mode so even though I knew why I lost weight I was still worried.

After a few weeks I told my wife that I would rather gain the weight back than to keep worrying like that so I added 500 calories a day above what I was eating. After a week I gained a pound and then 2 pounds then after about 2 and half pounds it level of. I am not gaining anymore but I am not losing. I think it may be that I reached a weight where it takes some of the extra calories to maintain my weight.

I finally reached a point that I was able to convince myself that I did not have colon cancer.
But by this time I was worrying about every little ache and pain that I felt.
So just about the time that I convinced my self that I did not have colon cancer I noticed that my left hip was aching one morning but stopped after I walked around for little while.
So I Googled it and found the symptoms of bursitis. I remembered that I had slept on that side all night. So the next night I slept on my right side and sure as anything I woke up with my right hip doing the same thing. So the next 2 nights I slept flat on my back. after the second night I had a pain in my lower back kind of left. This new pain I had felt before years ago when I was lifting weights in a gym and lifted to much in a squat and hurt my back in that same spot.
The lower back pain went away after I started to rotating sides when I sleep.
So during my research on hip pain I found that prostate cancer could spread to the hips.
I went in to panic again so much that I was convinced that I had prostate cancer that had spread and that I would surly die.
After more research and no other symptoms I convinced myself that I did not have prostate cancer.

That was this past week.
On Jan. 28 when I had my night time bowel movement it was constipation.

On Jan. 29 I also  had constipation in the morning and after lunch but was better by night time.
That night when I had my night time bowel movement I noticed two small spots of blood red on the toilet paper so I looked in the commode and I saw a small drop there close to my stool.

On Jan. 30 I got up and had my morning bowel movement there was no blood on the toilet paper  but there was a small spot on the side of my stool.
I didn't have a after lunch movement but the night movement seemed to be back to normal and not a sign of blood.

Jan. 31 Stool was fine this morning but after lunch I felt a little like I had to go but when I tried it was mostly gas. I set there and waited and finally strained enough to get a little to come out.
It was 3 or 4 small pieces and small in diamiter and I found one tiny spot of blood on one piece.
i worried all night long last night.
this morning I got up and had my morning bowel movement and everything seemed normal. The size was right it was a little soft but well formed ( my stools have always been soft in the mornings for some reason). I checked every inch of it with my flashlight and screwdriver and there was no blood but there was a few bits of what looked like carrots. I know there were small pieces of carrots in the chicken pot pies that we had for dinner last night.

I came here today because I was searching about carrots in stools and came across a post where someone  said that they inspect their stool and even keep a flashlight in the bathroom for checking it. When I read that it sounded just like me so I joined the site then.

Back the first time I worried about colon cancer about a month ago I started to checking all of my stools with a flashlight and screwdriver.
Now my mind has me back in panic mode about colon cancer.

Colon cancer does not run in my family on either side nor does prostate cancer. I know that the say that colon cancer comes mostly after 50 and mainly in the 60's and 70's but my mind will not let go.

By the way I should also mention that I have tourette syndrome so I don't know if that may have something to do with my mind thinking these things.

I am not afraid of dieing as much as I am of leaving my wife and my only child (16 year boy) here to make do on their on.
My wish and prayer is that I live long enough to raise my son to manhood and he with a family of his own.


Sorry if this was so long but I wanted to tell my story.

i forgot to mention that since all of this started around Dec. 20 I have done nothing except get up read on Google try to watch TV read more on Google and go to bed.
I guess all of that sitting may be the reason for the bursitis symptoms.

Also early this week I started having pains in my mid back and some times around my right shoulder balde.
Some times it feels like a catch and some times it feels like burning muscles. I wonder if my not doing anything could my muscles in my back have gotton weak? I started a few nights ago doing some stretches and it seems to have eased up some. It happens mostly when I sit a long time like after I typed this post.  Also some times I can move a certain way when it is hurting and it will pop between my back bone and shoulder blade and it feels better then.

i should also mention that I took ibuprofen for about 8 days for the bursitis symptoms then I read last night that ibuprofen may cause soem problems so I stopped taking them last night. I was taking two 200 mg in the morning then two 200 mg at night.
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: I am new and think I have an anxiety about cancer
« Reply #1 on: February 02, 2014, 05:09:30 AM »
Welcome to the forum. Good to have you as a member. Here you are with like minded people. People who understand. As we all suffer from something or other. So feel free to ask any questions. Our members are always willing to help others out. Good chatroom too. 3 posts to enter the room.

Find the correct section of the forum that suits your condition and create a new topic on it. This is just a welcome section. Never really get the same amount of help in this section as you would on the other sections of the forums. So whatever one suits the questions you are asking. Get much better answers.
All users of the chatroom must be 18 years old or over. The room is off limits to anybody under the age of 18.
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Offline midge123

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Re: I am new and think I have an anxiety about cancer
« Reply #2 on: February 03, 2014, 06:02:23 PM »
Join the club. My fears and anxuety are about the same issues and one thing leads to another.  I am knew here as of today.
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