i've had panic attacks for 4 years, but since August last year it's been so bad I haven't been able to leave my house. i was diagnosed with agoraphobia, my boss has been very understanding and told me I could work from home until I was better. I don't think he realised how long it would take to get better and back to work and neither did i. i thought to myself 'it will go off, i'll get out again' but it's just got worse and worse until I broke down completely.
It's now almost half a year later and I'm still working from home. every time I update them on my progress they don't really say much. I can do my job from home no problem, but they want me back in the office. i understand that, and i want to be back, but it's taking so long...i'm not ready.
After seeing a psychiatrist who wasn't helpful at all I decided to see a lady who does NLP hypnotherapy and CBT. It is helping, I feel better, but going outside still feels so far away and so difficult. I've been going for walks and stuff but I just keep wanting to run home. i'll continue to keep on going out though until i don't feel that way anymore.
I just wish I could wave a magic wand and be better now so I can just go back to work, i've completely isolated myself. i don't want to get fired, i like my job, they like me, i feel important there and valued but i feel it's only a matter of time till they've had enough.
i'm just thinking how much longer are they going to put up with me working from home until they decide it's time i either come back straight away or sack me....
just had to vent, hopefully i'll find some courage somewhere and my CBT plan will magicallly help in the next couple of months!