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Author Topic: Messy housemate making my anxiety worse  (Read 81 times)

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Offline Nnoir

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Messy housemate making my anxiety worse
« on: January 23, 2014, 07:50:38 PM »
My anxiety always seems to get way worse whenever I'm in an unclean house, so I try my best to keep it tidy.
However, my housemate has other ideas. She spills stuff all over the kitchen, loads the sink with her dishes and never washes them, makes mess all over the communal areas, has terrible bathroom habits and hordes dishes for months in her room.
I clean the flat twice a week from top to bottom, it gets so bad my mother has to help me. In a day, it's disgusting.

I've dropped hints for months and then started asking outright for her to clean. She said she'd do it later.
I've tried doing housework with her, but she'll just stand and watch me.
I've mentioned how my anxiety gets a lot worse when I'm in unclean living conditions but she still refuses to do everything.

Any suggestions on what to do would be brilliant.
Frustratingly, large confrontations tend to trigger my panic disorder, so I'd like to avoid any.
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Online MobileChucko

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Re: Messy housemate making my anxiety worse
« Reply #1 on: January 23, 2014, 09:19:59 PM »
Hi Nnoir...  Welcome to Anxiety Zone!

Unfortunately, living with another person is not an easy thing to do, under the best circumstances.  The way that your roommate and you maintain your flat, appears to be as different as night and day.  For roommates, I sure would consider this to be a big issue.

A suggestion would be for both of you to write down what you are looking for in a roommate.  Then, find a third, impartial person who can read both of your lists, and have the three of you discuss what changes can be made.

Unless the two of you are willing to compromise, and work things out, the bottom line here is that you two just might not be compatible living together.

Certainly if things don't workout, you might have to go your separate ways.  If that becomes the case, there is nothing wrong with you being selective if you get another roommate.  You will already have a list of traits that you are looking for in someone to share a flat, and this will help with your selection.

Good luck with the outcome! :sign0111: The very best to you, Nnoir!...  Chuck
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