Hey guys, i dont want to go on for too long so ill try break it down for you:Notes:
I have had relatively long periods of high stress / depression in the past few years but nothing serious
im not really healthy, not fat but half way, ive had times where i eat Fast Food three / four times a week
Run down of my life:Age 1-19:
Relatively normal upbringing other than moving between homes a lotReverse Dejauvu Feeling:
I remember this feeling i used to get in my teens where i would just zone in and out for a second
and wonder what just happened, like a reverse dejavu.
This happened very rarely and usually when i was standing up and never thought about it muchAge 19:
Try Marijuana for the first time, amazingAge 20:
Have a huge panic attack after i take massive amounts of Marijuana,
end up calling an ambulance because i think im dying: My first real Panic Attack.
Turns out everything was fine. Age 20-22:
Few panic attacks during weed smoking but nothing as serious as first
I basically went on a 4 year non stop Weed binge during these times. Panic attacks were rare.Age 21:
I think my left eye is giving out because my vision is getting blurry. Have a huge panic
but turns out im just short sighted and this happens to a lot of people as they hit their 20s.
Never bothers me again.What im currently worried about:Age 22:
I begin to feel kinda weird at the end of my highs.
- When im in my bed (3am-ish) trying to sleep (notably in the absence of light)
- its like im processing but forgetting at the same time, its like the lights go off in my head but my eyes are still open.
- Its like a feeling of disorientation, memory lapses that take me out and back in.
- Similar to the reverse dejavu i used to have in my teens but really really dragged out.
- My vision is fine but its like the function that records short term memories just stops.
- Only seconds are passing but it seems like ages for me.
- Looking at my wall, as im seeing it, im forgetting it then remembering where i am.
- 99% of this happens when im standing up after long periods of sitting or in dark areas
I panicked after it started happening really frequently almost went on for hours
I went to the doctor and he said its brought on by stress/anxiety and prescribed me Propranolol.
After he told me all this saying it was anxiety caused and took my blood pressure etc, it went down considerably.
I took the propranolol and whilst it didnt go away completely, it subsided 80%.Age 23:
I give up Marijuana to see if its the weed causing it.
During the 2 months i stayed sober, it rarely but still happened.
Only happened when i went outside or if i was going upstairs to sleep.
Like once i went to the jewellers and whilst he was talking, i zoned out completely
and whilst you couldnt tell by looking at me, inside i was getting that "reverse dejavu feeling"
like only few seconds were passing it felt like ages, disorientation.Now (Im still 23)
I still have anxiety of the mind (propranolol helps my body anxiety) but i can still be social.
The memory lapse still happens, like twice a day for a few minutes as opposed to ages/hours before.
If it does happen, i dont feel scared because i just think its caused by stress/anxiety and it goes away by itself. Usually when my attention is fixated on something else.
Ive tried finding matching symptoms with a lot of serious conditions to no availability
brain tumours, alzhemiers, schizophrenic etc nothing sounds like it. Family history is pretty much good. No mental illness etc.
Ive asked for a blood test just in case
but what do you think? Should i go back to my doctor and ask for serious tests?
The reason why im curious is because the eye thing bothered me then it turned out it was nothing / anxiety causing fear that something was wrong,
the weed body pain thing bothered me, turned out it was just a panic attack.
Could anxiety cause this lapse in short term memory / eyes open but mind flogging? I can recall all times where i was worrying about it or when it was happening, so its not like the memories arent being stored or recorded...
I know its long but any help would make the world of difference...