Hi . . .glad you came by and shared your experience . . .
I have found logging my days, good, bad or otherwise, always helps me to keep the events in perspective . . . in the beginning, I did see it as an ongoing battle, but it helped me to realize that the anxiety messages were coming from me and that perhaps there was something positive to gain by establishing a rapport with those symptoms . . . now, don't get me wrong . . . .I don't like the physical symptoms but it seemed that the more I said okay, you're a symptom what are you telling me? the more I found out that I was able to process the triggers and that in turn lessened the frequency and the intensity . . . .I still get anxious and I still have anxiety episodes but, thank goodness, I have not had a debilitating panic attack in around a couple of years (I am not keen to revisit those) . . . .I still feel more comfortable at home base, but I do make an effort to get out and get into places that I previously did not like to go to such as crowded shopping malls the day before Christmas . . . it gives me a sense of accomplishment . . . .
Like you, I also used to have anxiety first and last things in the day and I came to realize that, for me, that was anticipation anxiety . . . what will the day hold that might be a trigger and then, at night, replaying everything that happens . . . I have found, again for me and we are all different, that mindfulness, positive thinking, and CBT practices have helped me to move away from those episodes . . . I always perceive my recovery as a process and not a one time event . . . .I don't want to give the impression that my recovery has not been without disappointments, frustrations, etc. because that is unrealistic . . . I have and continue to have and probably always will have speed bumps . . . . but, I seem to be able to deal with them more effectively, especially when I focus on the good things that have happened during a day . . ..
So, my positive contribution is that not only does the process of recovery help me deal with my anxiety / panic, but it also has helped me to decide who I want to be as a person which is a reward in and of itself . . .. take care, kc