I'm not sure if this is the right place for this post. Sorry if it's not. As I'm typing this I am kind of still drunk, unfortunately and feeling completely insane.
For the last 2 days I have been drinking very, very heavily because I've been at parties. I've been very depressed and anxious since the break up of a long-term relationship and turned to alcohol I guess. I've always loved being drunk, and have been extremely drunk before many times, but for some reason this is much different and very scary.
I'm almost noon here now and I stopped drinking around 3-4 am? I drank a ton. Like, ridiculous amounts and I feel terrible. I vow to never drink again. I felt fine at first, but I feel completely insane now. I haven't slept and I keep thinking I am hallucinating. When I try to sleep I hear the people at the party and laughter. Sounds are so loud to me. I am extremely irritable. I have the worst headache. I am shaking uncontrollably and feel just out of this world. I'm dizzy and confused and I'm having trouble concentrating and holding conversations. Faces are scaring me and I feel extremely paranoid. I don't really know if it's just my anxiety playing off of me being hungover or if I've entered a kind of psychosis now.
Before I drank I was having extreme/anxiety depression and I'm thinking I just flipped a switch and made myself full-blown crazy. I had no idea that you could hallucinate from drinking. I've been trying to convince someone to take me to the ER for hours now.
If I get through this and don't wind up in a loony bin, I promise I am never drinking again. Ever.