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Author Topic: Really scared of the future.  (Read 192 times)

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Offline Dpunicorn

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Really scared of the future.
« on: December 27, 2013, 01:37:49 PM »
Alright so for the past week or so I've been obsessing over the inevitable like growing up and death. I'm only a few years away from becoming an adult and that idea really scares me because I don't wanna grow up so fast. Time is going by unbelievably fast for me. Days feel like hours, weeks feel days and yeah it's going by too fast. I think it's because of my depersonalization and the fact that I sleep all day and stay up all night. Also the idea of death has been haunting me all month. I'm scared of how soon it will come and the fact that everybody has to die. I don't wanna grow up and I don't wanna die and it feels like both of those will come soon. Anybody else obsessing over this? Any replies would be greatly appreciated.
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Offline MMMA3410

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Re: Really scared of the future.
« Reply #1 on: December 27, 2013, 02:39:15 PM »
Though I cannot relate to the obsession of growing old and dying, I can relate to obsessing in general and the depersonalization. Depersonalization can make everything go so fast because we don't feel like we are actually there. I literally have very, very little memory of the passed 3 weeks which in turn freaks me out and makes things worse. Though it is hard and I am not saying I have mastered it, I think you need to find a level of acceptance. When we can accept that we feel like we are in a dream and just "weird" then the chemical in our brains responsible for it will slowly dissipate. Like I said, I have not mastered this. I can understand your fear of everything passing you by though because that is how I feel since I remember nothing of the passed 3 weeks. It seems to me that your having problems with anxiety and it has found something to latch on to (your fear of growing old and dying). You are a few years away from becoming an adult and it is normal to worry, however your worry has escalated to anxiety. Sleeping all day is definitely not going to help. Try and force yourself to get up and do the things you would do if you were not feeling that "weird" feeling (easier said than done). It can help a lot. Maybe going out can put you back into the moment and slow things down a bit. Also, seeing a therapist can help identify what put you into this depersonalization state and how to climb your way out. When that happens things will slow down and maybe your obsession of growing up and dying will die down. No pun intended. Good luck to you!!
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Offline MobileChucko

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Re: Really scared of the future.
« Reply #2 on: December 27, 2013, 04:53:23 PM »
Hi Dp...  I can sure relate to your obsessive thoughts.  I experienced breakthrough panic attacks over the summer. Then, several months ago, my anxiety returned, 24/7 (the Remeron I was on had stopped working, pooped-out on me).  My thoughts were not so much on my actual death, but more about me being sick, not even being able to take care of myself.  I could walkout in the kitchen, see a single dirty fork in the sink, and that would put me over the edge.  My psychiatrist started me on a new medication some five weeks ago, Citalopram (Celexa), and I am doing so much better.  Here is a great quote: If you are depressed, you are living in the past.  If you are anxious, you are living in the future.  If you are at peace, you are living in the moment.  I know it is not the easiest thing to do, but do you best to live in the moment.  A great movie I recommend you watch is "Peaceful Warrior".  It's all about living in the moment.  The best to you, Dp!...  Chuck
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