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Author Topic: Crippled by my HA- female issues  (Read 993 times)

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Offline Gemgrl2000

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Crippled by my HA- female issues
« on: December 04, 2013, 07:44:15 AM »
Hi Everyone, I read here often for comfort but this is my first time posting.. I really need some reassurance!

I have HORRIBLE health anxiety that was brought on about 10 years ago by the death of my dad who went in for a regular work physical and died 7 months later with cancer.. It made me come face to face with my own mortality.

I used to keep up with my annual apps until the Dr I knew and trusted left his practice and I couldn't bring myself to see another one. I will be 45 next month and haven't had an annual pap for about 5-6 years. I have to say that my past paps have always been clear and I have never had any female issues.. Until now. I believe I am in perimenopause ( my mother entered it at exactly my age) but my HA is telling me that I am doomed because I haven't been checked in so long.
Last month, I started having a clear, watery discharge. No smell, no burning, no itching.. Just felt wet most of the time. Now, I have started my period when I just had one 2 weeks ago ( I have always been regular with my cycles until this year where one came a week early and others within a few days of normal. I know that this is par for the course with perimenopause but you know how the mind of the HA sufferer works. I am having many of the symptoms such as thinning hair, a few hot flashes, mood swings, sleepless nights etc..
I am gearing up to go to the Dr. but I am trying to wait until after the holidays because I don't want bad news for Christmas ( I know.. Crazy..) but until then, can someone offer me some encouragement and talk me off the cliff?? I am desperate to hear from others who have neglected their annual paps and everything turned out just fine. I hate that I am most likely going thru a normal part of life yet in my mind, I need to start making funeral arrangements!
Thank you in advance ;-)
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Offline BuzzBee1

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #1 on: December 04, 2013, 09:31:26 AM »
Hello Gemgrl2000,

Welcome to the forum.  You are now a member of our community, where you will find support and advice from other members in similar situations.   It's always nice to find someone else who understands, and to know you're not alone.

We have sections in the forum that address specific concerns, so feel free to post or start a new topic in the section that best fits your situation.  Feel free to explore the rest of the forum.  You may find the other topics helpful, and you may be able to offer advice or support to someone else.

We also have a chat room for members over the age of 18.  Once you have made three meaningful posts, you will be allowed access to the chat room.

Gemgrl2000, I can understand some of what you are going through.  My first anxiety kicked in when my mom had a stroke after being healthy all her life.  Like you said, it brought me face to face with my own mortality.  After that, I was sure every little pain was a life threatening illlness.

When I found this site, and actually found out about HA (health anxiety), it really helped to calm my fears, as I realized a lot of this was just in my mind.

The issues you are describing sound quite common for someone entering menopause.  Also, remember that your hormones are also going to be fluctuating and not helping with your thoughts.  Just because you haven't had a pap in a few years, doesn't mean anything is wrong.   Go ahead an schedule your appointment.  You can schedule now for after the holidays.  Get it on the calendar.  The sooner you go, the sooner you'll get good news and be relieved.

Good luck to you, and again, welcome to AZ.

Buzzy
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Offline Gemgrl2000

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #2 on: December 04, 2013, 10:12:25 AM »
Thank you so much for your reply Buzzy, I don't know if its my hormones right now or the fear that I have neglected to take care of myself that has me completely paralyzed.. After all.. It HAS to be something bad after 5 years right?
On a side note.. Woke up to 2 zits on my face this morning.. I have NEVER had acne issues.. Ugh, lol  :fragend005:
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Offline Stressed Jumper

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #3 on: December 04, 2013, 12:44:24 PM »
I agree that all of this sounds like you are riding the perimenopause hormonal roller coaster, nothing more.  Not to get into your personal business but most cervical cancers are caused by exposure to one of the high risk strains of HPV.  These do not cause genital warts but can lead to cervical lesions although most cases clear themselves within 2 years if you have a healthy immune system.  So long as you have been practicing safe sex or are in a monogamous relationship the chances of having cervical cancer are VERY low. 

Not to give you TMI but sometimes I also have the "wet" feeling, particularly before my period, and I am 33 and in perfect health.

Last but not least the zits also come with the hormone changes.  My mom used to complain that she had more acne issues at 50 than she did at 15...no fun but normal and manageable with a good face wash.

Hang in there, make your doc appt, and prepare to get good news!
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Offline Gemgrl2000

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #4 on: December 04, 2013, 01:05:00 PM »
Hey, I put my personal business out there so that I could get responses just like yours!

I literally had a wave of relief after reading your response.. I know for a fact I have a great immune system ( never sick,incredibly fast healer..) and yes, even at my age, I have only ever " been" with my husband and he only with me ( unheard of I know but we married when I was 16 and he was 18 and have been going strong for 28 years ;-)

The crazy wetness was a little alarming but I didn't think much of it.. The back to back periods 14 days apart has put me into HA shutdown and I appreciate you taking the time to post your reply and bring me out of it if even just for awhile ;-)

Even though I am PETRIFIED of Drs and avoid them at all cost, I'll be making that appointment and since I NEVER want to go through this hell again.. I will force myself to go every year.. I desperately need the piece of mind!

Thanks again!
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Offline Stressed Jumper

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #5 on: December 04, 2013, 02:49:13 PM »
Stress and other women you spend time around can also effect your cycle.  When I moved from NY to VA to be with my (now) husband I had two periods that lasted for two weeks each.  I freaked and called my lady doc and she calmed me right down.  If you work in an office with other women then their cycles may be throwing you off as well.  Heck, the "women" in question might not even need to be human.  I am a horse trainer and when we get a new mare (female horse) into the barn is can mess with my cycle even though I am on the pill.  I guess hormones are hormones!

I am glad my words helped.  Hang in there and enjoy the holidays!
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Offline Gemgrl2000

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #6 on: December 04, 2013, 04:00:40 PM »
I work from home and have 2 boys ( moved out) and the hubby but I DO have 3 female dogs :bigsmile:

Glad you said something about prolonged periods.. I was just thinking that this is day 4 and should be starting to let up a bit but its still the same as the first day..it's always something...I hate not knowing when or if( lol) it will end. Ugh
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Offline Gemgrl2000

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #7 on: January 20, 2014, 05:39:17 PM »
Ok, I have the first Gyn appointment in years in just 3 days and I am paralyzed with fear... I haven't barely eaten in 2 days and I'm having panic attacks and just want to sleep all day. I'm convinced that this is just the beginning of a long road of further tests and extended waiting. Thing is.. I'm not going in for any particular problem other than I believe I am entering perimenopause and want a test to confirm. I'm just so scared that I have neglected to get my yearly tests for so long so I'm doomed.. Can anyone relate??
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Offline worried24_7

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #8 on: January 20, 2014, 07:14:05 PM »
Gemgrl2000,

I understand your fear - I just went in for a mammogram and well women exam both today and have been paralyzed with fear all day ( googling like crazy, on pins and needles waiting for the phone to ring etc….) but one thing they told me is that if you have a negative HPV test then you don't need a pap for 3 years.  I too am in the midst of perimenopause - it is not fun and makes your lady parts do all kinds of strange, unwelcome things - exactly what you describe.  I was convinced I had cervical cancer a few months ago because I spotted ALL THE TIME and after  intercourse.  Took DIM, cleared that right up.

Unfortunately, they probably will not be able to confirm perimenopause because your hormones can look normal one day and be all out of whack the next day. 

My mom hasn't had a pap smear or mammogram in over 30 years - I don't recommend that - she is now 72.

Big hugs to you - I can relate.  I put off my del woman and mammo until after the holidays too!  And, I put off registering for a half marathon because I am afraid of what the results of my mammo will be… sigh… anxiety is awful
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Offline ceh1354

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #9 on: January 20, 2014, 09:12:11 PM »
Hey, I posted to you the other day.
I could have written this exact post almost a year ago. I had my first pap in 5 years on Mar 4 of '13. I was petrified. everything you feel right now was what I was feeling.

Just to be honest, nothing anyone tells you on here is going to knock out your fear. Stories, like mine, of everything turning out fine, will ease your mind for like 5 minutes, then you'll start thinking again.... I know, I went through it.
You only have a couple days, get through it, even with your fears. When it's all over, you'll be relieved and you can tell yourself to get paps each year (or whatever is recommended to you) so you won't put yourself through this again!

You can do this!! Yep, you're scared. All of us on here are scared about something more often than not, unfortunately.  It will be over with soon!!  :winking0008:

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Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. Ephesians 6:11

Offline Gemgrl2000

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #10 on: January 20, 2014, 09:21:26 PM »
I'm right there with you and feel your pain... It's good to know about the HPV test, as far as I know, I've never tested positive for it (assuming they would have told me years ago) hopefully the odds are in my favor that I have only been with my husband of 28 years!

I keep telling myself to calm down, I don't really have any symptoms of anything bad other than 2 slightly early periods which seem to be normal at my age but my fear creeps right back in paralyzing me. I'm convinced that there's no way everything is fine when I haven't been checked in so long.

Do you get your paps every year? I've seen SO much about woman our age spotting due to us ovulating less often. I'm sure that googling isn't helping your nerves much.. I can't google.. I stick to sites like this for reassurance. I'm sending you good thoughts for the outcome of your tests. Be proud that you were brave enough to go.. I'm thinking seriously about canceling this appointment! Lol
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Offline Gemgrl2000

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #11 on: January 20, 2014, 09:25:35 PM »
Ceh1354- thanks again for your help... I am absolutely a shell of myself right now and not able to function as a human being...sigh..

If I can ask.. What finally made you go to the Dr?

Believe me.. My hiney will be back getting a pap every single year no matter what the new guidelines are! Lol
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Offline ceh1354

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #12 on: January 20, 2014, 09:36:01 PM »
Ooohh, believe me, I have been crippled by this and other things. I know the feeling and it's horrible.

I had some other issues, relating to constipation and a couple other things. I don't want to go into detail because I don't want to put anything else into your head to worry about! LOL. it didn't have anything to do with periods. I didn't even want to make the phone call, but I knew I had to if I wanted answers, and to get myself up to date on paps would be a plus.  :happy0151:

Oh, I know! I said the same thing about going every year, and so it is almost time for me to make another appointment. Aye!  :spineyes:
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Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. Ephesians 6:11

Offline Gemgrl2000

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #13 on: January 23, 2014, 09:24:20 PM »
Well, had my pap today.. I was feeling really good about everything until the Dr. Said that I have a blood vessel (apparently the vessel that produces the mucus plug when about to give birth) in my cervix. Something like a cyst. I asked if anything needed to be done and was given a simple "no". She also said that the opening to my cervix was a pin hole most likely from never giving birth ( I've had 2 c sections) . When I asked if everything looked generally ok, she said " I think so" but seemed a bit evasive of my questions. I'm too scared to google.

I almost feel like, by telling me these things, she was setting me up for bad news by mentioning that it could be from this or this....I don't think this is my HA talking, it's just the feeling of evasiveness that I got when asking questions..

Results should be back by Monday and until then I will be a complete mess.. Ugh!
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Offline stephtronic

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Re: Crippled by my HA- female issues
« Reply #14 on: January 23, 2014, 11:59:20 PM »
Stay strong. We HAers have the tendency to read too deeply into what our doctors say. I've run into this issue a few times and ended up worrying about nothing. It's possible she didn't mean to come off like that and wasn't "setting you up" for bad news. I was super anxious about my pap as well, and I asked my GYN if everything looked okay, and his response was, "I didn't see anything grossly abnormal." Meaning that he didn't see anything glaringly wrong but that doesn't mean there's absolutely nothing because he won't know until he got the pap results. So I worried for days because of how he said that.... BUT, my pap was normal! She can't give you an absolute answer, but she wouldn't be saying that she thought so if she thought there was a good cause for concern.
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