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Author Topic: depression in relation to anxiety becoming unbearable  (Read 759 times)

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Offline maggotina

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depression in relation to anxiety becoming unbearable
« on: July 01, 2013, 11:24:52 PM »
hi everyone. i have posted predominantly in the health anxiety section of this site,
but i have been feeling at a bit of a loss lately, particularly with my depression, and i don't feel i have anyone to talk to who won't just start to worry about me...
thinking i am ill or dying, constantly, is really taking a toll on me. my doctor and therapist both said the stress would likely start to effect me long before any feared sickness befell me.
i feel awful all the time and can no longer differentiate between real or imagined,
self made or natural.
coupled with general anxiety about the well being of my family, my relationship, even my pets,  this feeling has really beaten me down. i was initially diagnosed with clinical depression at age 12, with a diagnosis of severe anxiety and possible ptsd to follow.
i am so low i find myself disassociating, just turning everything off so i don't have to think about it, or talk about it...
but really i can't ignore what is in my own head.
i haven't been to my therapist lately...
our last session left off with me saying i might want to come in for couples therapy (relating to some infidelity on my boyfriend's end- which added quite heavily to my feelings of anxiety/depression)
and i just haven't been able to pull it together to make that appointment.
been having thoughts of self harm/bulimia, which i have been in recovery from for a few years but i am now feeling wildly out of control and i don't know how much longer i can do it.
not really looking for a question answered, or any response, really. i just have no one i am willing to burden with this information. needed to say it somewhere.
thanks for listening.
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Online Cuchculan

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Re: depression in relation to anxiety becoming unbearable
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2013, 06:59:58 AM »
Small exercise. You imagine you have an illness. Write it down on a piece of paper. You do this for about two months. Make a list. Of all the illnesses you think you have. Then tick off the ones that were real. Leave the ones the mind made up alone. Probably end up with no ticks at all. Which will show you how the mind works. Next time you feel you have something, go back to your list. See if it is on the list. If it is, tell yourself ' I have been here before and it was only my mind '. This is like taken those first steps to changing how you think. That what you are having is just irrational thoughts. I know they can make you feel bad. That they can feel so real. But by doing something like this, it is like taken some power back into your own hands.
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