Hey folks. As you can tell, my screen name is ctte, named after my favourite Yes album. I am 16 years old, and I have severe OCD.
The reason why I signed up for this forum was, of course, to talk about my OCD. Right now, it's gotten so bad, that I stay up, like, 3 hours after I should have gone to sleep, just thinking REALLY hard about the past. (You see, my obsessions right now are about whether I did some bad things in the past. Since I can't actually prove whether or not I did them because of the lack of evidence, I'm kind of not doing so well controlling these thoughts.)
I'd like to take a moment to complain: it really, REALLY sucks having OCD. I'm an IB student; I don't have time to do anything else other than do homework. Every day, people always greet me as if I'm in a good mood. I'm not. I always want to be by myself, but I can never find ANY privacy. So I usually retreat to my bedroom as often as possible.
Anyway, life isn't ALL that bad. It's only been this way for, like, the past year. I just can't seem to remember how happy I used to be when I was younger.
So in conclusion, thanks for listening to my rant
I'll keep trying as hard as I can to get rid of OCD so I can decide, 100% conclusively, whether or not I was a monster back then.
