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Author Topic: constant dreams!!  (Read 4854 times)

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Offline el_chan

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constant dreams!!
« on: October 27, 2009, 09:16:48 PM »
hi,
for about 3 weeks now, EVERY night I have dreams contantly throughout the night and by the time I wake up I feel exhausted because it feels like i've have no sleep. the thing is, these dreams i'm having are always about this certain situation that was happening in my life awhile ago that stressed me out big time! So my question is, I'v been breaking out lately again. When i was actually going THROUGH that stressfull situation i broke out too, but since the stress has gone my skin cleared up, now i'm having these dreams, i'm getting pimples again! is it possible to be stressed in your sleep but not through the day? i'm not stressed through the day, i feel fine (i havn't even been getting anxiety lately!) but i was thinknig maybe my body gets stressed at night through theses dreams. Coz sometimes i'll wake up from them and my heart is racing and i'm sweaty and stuff. So does anyone think its possible for this 'night time' stress to break me out? if there's even such a thing as 'night time' stress lol.

And does anyone have any advice on how to stop these dreams? its driving me crazy. And by the way, I dont even know why i'm dreaming about this because it's not like i'm focusing on it through the day. I've made a concious effort to stop dwelling on it and to get on with life.
If this IS what is causing my break out thats another reason why i deperatly want these stupid dreams to stop. its lowering my confidence and making me not want to go out...
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Offline arijones1

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Re: constant dreams!!
« Reply #1 on: October 28, 2009, 01:40:54 AM »
hey, sounds like you are having nocturnal panic attacks, what do you dream about?
do you find you are waking up a lot at night? if so your sleep is not full. high percentage of unexpected panic attacks happen between 130-330 am
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Offline tmicrowave

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Re: constant dreams!!
« Reply #2 on: October 28, 2009, 03:26:39 AM »
could be some subconscious suppressed or unresolved emotions on the subject of the situation

i mean for me
after a break up with a guy i'd been with for 3 years
i dreampt about him and all sorts of weiiird situations EVERY NIGHT for like about a year. even after i'd just gotten past it and made a conscious decision to stop thinking about it.
maybe because your trying to avoid it the dreams are trying to remind you maybe you have something else to feel or ... accept or something

thats just what i'd assume if it was me
i just try to take some times for my emotions and i duno
it helps me
like even if i have to sit down and feel bad about something i wanna forget about
or if i have to write down that i accept something is over and i'm getting on with my life
whatever you think helps
thats the sorta stuff i do so
hope things start lookin better
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Jenna


"When the heart weeps for what it has lost, the soul laughs for what it has found." - Sufi aphorism


Offline el_chan

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Re: constant dreams!!
« Reply #3 on: October 28, 2009, 07:54:23 AM »
thanks for the replies guys, but I have done everything u suggested... I write about it a lot in my diary. like, PAGES on it. and i have taken time to 'feel' the emotions, coz i've lost count of how many times i've broken down! I don't no what else to do! I feel like i've accepted it and i try to deal with it as best i can, but these dreams just keep reminding me and making it impossible to move on. I really don't no what to do..

I guess as more detail, the dreams are always about my brother. It's SO hard to explain becuase it's just such a mess, but basically my brother (who I was really close to) recently married this woman who has Narcissistic personality disorder. And she has just tried to tear our family apart ever since we met her. The things she has done are honestly EVIL and you probebly wouldn't believe me if I told you. She doesnt want us to have anything to do with him anymore and has kicked us out. and now because my brothers married to her, he's changed to be like her, and doesnt want anything to do with us anymore either (he's totally brainwashed by her)
My brother was my friend and he was the the most un-selfish, nicest person you'd ever meet. I'm still having a hard
time coming to terms with everything that has happend over the past 2 years but I really feel like I have accepted that i've lost him now.
These stupid dreams are always about me seeing him and her taking him away, but it's always done in a way that makes me wake up with my heart racing and feeling shakey.

sorry this is kinda a long post, but maybe more detail will help with other peoples suggestions on how I can get rid of this??
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Offline charlie1

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Re: constant dreams!!
« Reply #4 on: October 28, 2009, 04:04:38 PM »
Hi el-chan, I totally agree with tmicrowaves' post, but you say you've done those things anyway. From what you've written since, I'd guess that you're very emotionally traumatised regarding the loss of closeness to your brother. To an extent, it almost sounds like a bereavement so it's understandable that you'd subconsciously resist the coming to terms with the situation, as you'd want things to be as they were. I can only suggest that somehow you communicate with your brother and say that you love him and don't want to lose him, and somehow work out a way to tolerate his awful wife cos generally people, especially guys, seem to side with their partners so if you slag her off it'll just drive him closer to her as it may be interpretted as a slur on his judgement in choice of lover. I realise that would be hard if she's as vile as you suggest but can't think how else you could get a peaceful mind.
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Offline tmicrowave

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Re: constant dreams!!
« Reply #5 on: October 28, 2009, 05:13:56 PM »
i agree with charlie
let him know you love him

i can relate because when me and my brother arent close i start having weird dreams about him
or when i havent went to visit my uncle in a few months i start dreaming about him
not quite as extreme as your situation but
even at this very moment
i suffer because my brother doesn't really know how much i love him
don't know if thats the case for you! but yeah.
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Jenna


"When the heart weeps for what it has lost, the soul laughs for what it has found." - Sufi aphorism


Offline el_chan

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Re: constant dreams!!
« Reply #6 on: October 29, 2009, 10:20:19 PM »
yeah, i guess it's kinda a hard situation. when my brother first started seeing her (like, probebly for the fist 6-8 months) I did voice to him that what she was doing was horrible etc... but because that wasn't working (it's as Charlie said, they take the sides of their partners, and it just made him even more distant) But i've NEVER once been rude, or even wierd with his wife. I've always been really nice to her. I seem to do that with everybody, even people who treat me real bad. But even that doesnt work because it doesnt matter what u do, she'l make something up and tell my brother that we've (my family) done something mean to her or something. and then my brother believes her (even though he can see with his own eyes that we're all perfectly nice to her) and it makes us even MORE distant! so NOTHING works. what the rest of my family and I have had to do is to simply stop trying to see them because it's the only way we can have peace in our lives, without her causing constant chaos.
I've expressed to my brother how much I love and miss him, but he feels he needs to stick to his wife COMPLETLY and thinks she must be right about us (even though he should know us better than that!!), and he doesnt even talk to her about her behavior.
My brother was the perfect victom of the narcissistic personally. The person with narcissism goes for partners who they can eaily minipulate and brainwash and thats what she's done to my brother, because he's always been such a gentle, trustworthy type person.

So as you can probebly see, it's a pretty hopeless situation. I guess I just have to wait for the day he might wake up and see things as they really are. but I can't keep losing sleep untill then!! and having horrible dreams all through the night!
Do you think going on any type of medication or something might help? just to take for awhile, till these dreams pass. I've never been into meds, i've always liked the natural way... especially since i'm only 18! but i'm getting desperate and i feel like i've tried everything else..

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Offline charlie1

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Re: constant dreams!!
« Reply #7 on: October 30, 2009, 05:47:41 AM »
I reckon that just by writing things down here as you've done, things will start to improve for you. I believe that by actually acknowledging what you're thinking and feeling subconsciously in a concrete form, such as talking on this forum, to friends, family, or even a therapist, then somehow the disappointment, anger, sadness, etc, that you feel regarding your situation becomes less damaging somehow, as you're giving yourself permission to feel as you do and valuing your thoughts as allowable and legitimate. My sister got with an oaf of a bloke who none of my family thought much of, as he was an emotional retard, selfish, manipulative, deceitful, untrustworthy, possibly violent to her cos of jealousy and insecurity even though he was a flirt, so we all hardly ever saw her apart from xmas and the like cos of him for ages. However, they've been together 20 years now and over time he's mellowed and become loving, helpful, kind(ish), thoughtful(ish), more honest and open and I now genuinely like him. He's become more like my sister and they get on really well now. Love has a great power to heal, and if this vile woman is "the one" then there is hope as they must have great things to teach each other for there to be such a powerful energy holding them together, in spite of people thinking they'd be better apart. Sorry if this isn't helpful to you or is depressing to you, but I can remember feeling as you describe many years ago, and we all wanted my sister to dump the idiot, but now he's her soul-mate, and probably always was, and they're both great. Hope he never reads this cos I've never written such hostile stuff about him before, but it's unlikely as he doesn't understand or suffer from anxiety and weirdness. Don't think you need meds, just give it time and keep talking about how you feel rather than bottle it up
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