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Offline BetseyJane

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Hello, Im anxious
« on: August 28, 2014, 12:29:31 PM »
Hi all,
New to the forum here.  I've suffered from anxiety off and on for years, but it was managable until I started having kids.  In college, I had a significant bout of health anxiety, mostly due to medical classes I was taking (I work in healthcare).  I was certain I had MS/Myasthenia Gravis/ALS/Lupus.  I, of course, did not.  From college until now (about 12 years) my anxiety was insignificant and really didn't impact me on a day to day basis (as I had developed a pretty good anti-anxiety regime of healthy diet, LOTS of hard exercise and plenty of sunshine)  However, now that I have kiddos, I've had 2 bouts of health anxiety about myself (once with MS again and once in my first pregnancy--I was sure that I had some placental issue--which I did not) And, I'm not able to get out as much and do the things that helped me control my anxiety as I had in the past. 

Since having kids, the anxiety has gone into overdrive.  I now have HA about my kid's health.  I was certain that my DD who is now 2.5 had some form of autism when she was younger (she does not).  I voiced these worries to my husband and other family members, who promptly thought I was nuts (not arguing there!).  However, this anxiety did make it hard for me to enjoy her babyhood.  Now, unfortunately, I'm doing it again.  Only it's worse this time.  I have a new baby, 3 month old little boy.  He's just the sweetest thing.  And, I'm SURE he is going to develop autism.  I watch him constantly for the "signs" waiting for him to regress or have his development slow (as is common with babies who go on to develop autism).  It's terrible.  And what's worse, I KNOW that if he did develop autism, well, we would do anything we needed to do to help him reach his full potential.  And, why I'm focusing on autism, and not things like genetic disorders or childhood leukemia that are scarier and even deadly is BEYOND me.  But, I guess that's the thing about anxiety/OCD (I've been told by my therapist that my worries have an OCD quality about them)-- they aren't logical.  So, anyhow, here I am.  I'd love support and strategies to help me get through this.  I WANT to enjoy this baby, and love him for who he is, regardless of any outcome.  I want to be a calm, loving and supportive mother and wife.  anyhow, Hello, and thanks for reading.   :action-smiley-065:
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Offline MobileChucko

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Re: Hello, Im anxious
« Reply #1 on: August 28, 2014, 01:12:47 PM »
Hello Betsey, and welcome to Anxiety Zone...  My name is Chuck, and I am one of the Global Moderators here on the site.

You are now a member of our community, where you will find support and advice from other members in similar situations.   It's always nice to find someone else who understands, and to know you're not alone.

We have sections in the forum that address specific concerns, so feel free to post or start a new topic in the section that best fits your situation.  Feel free to explore the rest of the forum.  You may find the other topics helpful, and you may be able to offer advice or support to someone else.

We also have a chat room for members over the age of 18.  Once you have made three meaningful posts, you will be allowed access to the chat room.

Betsey, part of the support you are seeking, lies within your own post.  No one has any control as to whether a child will develop autism or not.  That is completely, 100%, out of our hands.  You said that if your youngest were to develop autism, you would do all that you could for your child, and I commend you for that.

I highly suggest that you do all that you can to treat/get treatment for your anxiety disorder.  And I find that the Serenity Prayer provides a lot of wisdom: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know that difference."

Again, welcome to Anxiety Zone.  The very best to you, Betsey!...  Chuck :grinning-smiley-003:
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Offline Never-Quit

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Re: Hello, Im anxious
« Reply #2 on: August 28, 2014, 02:57:57 PM »
Hi and welcome  :action-smiley-065:

As Chuck mentioned above, you want to be the "best you" you can be, for your yourself, your children and your family.  By getting treatment for your Anxiety/OCD.

It is very difficult to be a mother and have these anxiety problems weighing you down on a consistent basis, and the anxiety creates all this worrying which is common, and unnecessary with the correct type of treatment.  :yes:

You need to take care of yourself first, so you can take care of your family  :yes:

Your Therapist has already noticed some of the irrational anxiety and OCD that is currently being displayed.

You may want to speak to your Therapist about recommending a Psychiatrist that might be able to properly diagnose and assist you.

Here are some resources - you can look at, print them out, and do the self-quiz - and take them to your next visit with your therapist and get some feedback on what would be best for you.

These are some wonderful diagnostic resources that I found very useful here at this Forum:

                                    SELF-DIAGNOSIS AND SELF-TESTS

                           - PANIC DISORDER + SELF-TEST
                                            I have chest pains or a racing heart.  I have a hard time breathing or a choking feeling.
                                            I feel dizzy, or I sweat a lot.  I have stomach problems or feel like I need to throw up.
                                            I shake, tremble, or tingle. I feel out of control. I feel unreal.
                                            I am afraid I am dying or going crazy.

                            -  GAD anxiety + SELF-TEST
                                            I never stop worrying about things big and small. I have headaches and other aches and pains for no reason.
                                            I am tense a lot and have trouble relaxing. I have trouble keeping my mind on one thing.
                                            I have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep. I sweat and have hot flashes.
                                            I sometimes have a lump in my throat or feel like I need to throw up when I am worried

                           - DEPRESSION + SELF-TEST
                                            Persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" mood. Loss of interest or pleasure in activities, including sex.
                                            Restlessness, irritability, or excessive crying. Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, helplessness, hopelessness,.
                                            Sleeping too much or too little, early-morning awakening.  Appetite and/or weight loss or overeating / weight gain
                                            Decreased energy, fatigue, feeling "slowed down"
                                            Thoughts of death or taking one's own life. Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making decisions.
                                            Persistent physical symptoms that do not respond to treatment, - headaches, digestive disorders, chronic pain

                           - OCD + SELF-TEST
                                            I have upsetting thoughts or images enter my mind again and again.
                                            I feel like I canít stop these thoughts or images, even though I want to.
                                            I have a hard time stopping myself from doing things again : counting, checking on things, washing hands.
                                            I am Re-arranging objects, doing things until it feels right, collecting useless objects
                                            I worry a lot about terrible things that could happen if Iím not careful.
                                            I have unwanted urges to hurt someone but know I never would.


I am happy you are joining us, Welcome  :action-smiley-065:

Make yourself at home, and feel free to post any questions you may have. 

You have a bright Future waiting for you!   :nature-smiley-016:

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