Well, let me just start off by saying I just graduated high school in late May, 2014 & I just turned 18 in early July. I am really stressed because I feel like I'm destined for a life of failure. I barely graduated high school, I didn't even get to walk in the ceremony because I failed ONE math class my senior year. Not to mention I was never educated about the ACT/SAT therefore I wasn't able to take them.
I graduated with a mere 2.8 GPA. I'm trying to get help about taking both tests so that I will be able to get into a good college & then transfer to my dream school, if possible. I don't know the first thing about college though & I'm scared that I will be so overwhelmed by the new environment that it'll scare me away.
I don't want to be scared anymore. I want to be able to get on the path of success. I have the motivation, but no supporters. I don't want to be alone on this. I feel like all my friends are surpassing me, while I'm left behind. I don't want to be the only of my friends that isn't in college yet. I know what I want to study, as it has been a dream of mine since I was 10 -- Architecture & Interior Design.
Oh, and financial security has always been a problem for my family, so I feel like college will just be another huge toll on mine & my parents' bank account. Money has always been a depressing subject for me because all of my friends have come from families w/ a successful financial background, while as I've always pretty much been the "broke friend". This has caused me to become very insecure & anxious of my surroundings, even to the point a paranoia. I've always tried to steer clear of social events that involved money & I become distant in my relationships because I feel like the person is judging or secretly making fun of me for being less fortunate. I've lost a lot of friends because of this.
I'm just really overwhelmed with the downturn my life is taking at such an early age.