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Author Topic: Talk me down  (Read 109 times)

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Offline Lindsay2427

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Talk me down
« on: August 21, 2014, 03:52:38 PM »
I feel like I have OCD and HA that go hand in hand. I have never been to therapy so I have never had a true diagnosis but my habits and thoughts are enough for me to know what I am suffering with. Recently I hvae become very afraid to throw things away. Garage is ok but for instance I jur swear my floors and I sweapt up a coin and tossed it on the garbage. I'm so TERRFIED this action will make me have pancreatic cancer symptoms or even have pancan. I feel the urge to dig that Penney and dime out of the trash.
I am no where near a hoarder and I'm actual quit opposite and like clean and clutter free but since my colon cancer obsession I have had obsessive fears and thoughts about tossing items. I am so afraid throwing something away will result in a negative health consequence.
Why is this happening to me? Why do I think this way? I could go on and on with other odd OCD things but I will stop here.
I'm just very anxiety ridden about throwing the coins away. Even though they were under the couch obeyed in dust and crumbs I could have saved them or donated them.   
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Offline Roman

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Re: Talk me down
« Reply #1 on: August 21, 2014, 04:52:24 PM »
Hi Lindsey. Throwing the coins away means nothing your mind is going a thousand miles a minute and it's clear to see that you need to talk to someone my friend about your anxiety. You threw the coins away because they were an after thought as to what's going on in ur mind right now. I do believe you have severe health anxiety, I do to I see someone and am on medication and although I still think irrationally sometimes I no where near where I was 8 months ago. It does help. You are a young strong healthy woman with a family and there's no doubt that you love them and take care of them you need to take the first step and make time for yourself. You've had a lot of tests which have all came back negative thank god, find some solace in that please my heart breaks for you I've known you for awhile and don't want to see you like this.
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Offline potternut

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Re: Talk me down
« Reply #2 on: August 21, 2014, 07:46:12 PM »
When we feel out of control, due to depression, anxiety, life events, etc, we look for ways to get back in control.  Your OCD-like behavior may be a way for you to feel like you have control over something.  Holding on to those coins sounds like your attempt to make sense of your PC fear...For us HA peeps, the scariest part is that sometimes people get sick for no "good" reason, i.e. non-smokers who get lung cancer.  When we hear that someone has lung cancer, the first question is always "was he/she a smoker?" When we hear that the person was, the diagnosis makes sense.  It's the randomness of some illnesses that tend to scare us, especially because there's not a whole lot that we can do to prevent it.  So...to reduce our fear and anxiety, we start exhibiting control over other things. 

Just a thought...((((hugs)))) to you! :action-smiley-065:
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It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.

Offline anxietay

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Re: Talk me down
« Reply #3 on: August 21, 2014, 07:55:35 PM »
Lindsay,

I have dealt with OCD for about 8 years now. I know nothing I say will fix it, but just know you're not alone. I've had so many compulsions like the one you're describing..when I was younger I used to have to touch everything 7 times. Or else something horrible was going to happen to me. My HA and OCD, just like yours, go hand in hand. Nowadays my most visible symptom is hand washing, or avoiding touching surfaces like doorknobs, light switches. My the agony that my constant thoughts cause is much worse than those :/ I have tried going to doctors but have had bad experiences. And since I'm in college I don't have much money to pay a specialist. I know its really hard, and I'm sorry you're going through the same thing
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