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Author Topic: I did a terrible thing :(  (Read 108 times)

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Online AncientMelody

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I did a terrible thing :(
« on: July 09, 2014, 01:02:00 PM »
My husband and I got into a really bad argument today. About money big surprise. Got out of control quickly, his tone was condescending which really gets to me. I admit that I don't have the best common sense and I know that can be irritating. He said I misinterpret his tone because of my own self loathing.......do I have self loathing, yes I do. But he doesn't hear how he comes off to me even when I try to explain it gently, he gets very defensive. My emotions got so out of control that I did something terrible. I grabbed a knife and made a threatening gesture at my own neck. I'm disgusted with myself.

I don't understand. I've been "getting better" sleeping more exercising regularly, in a good new job. But yet one unexpected stressor after another hits me and I don't know how to maintain my reserves.  I'm tired of seeing that knife or a mouthful of pills as an option during one of my out of control states. I regret so deeply how I hurt my husband when I did that.
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Offline Rob783

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Re: I did a terrible thing :(
« Reply #1 on: July 09, 2014, 01:32:37 PM »
Money is one of the most common cause of arguments in couples.  Its natural to argue, its healthy to argue.  Of course the key is to keep it constructive so both parties learn and want to strive to not make it a regular thing.  I'm guessing you  felt desperate during the argument and threatening yourself was the only way to get your point across.  My fiance' will throw things occasionally because she gets mad since I"m not getting the point she's trying to make ( like 3 times in a 3 year period).  Try not to feel too guilty, it happened and you cant control that.   Maybe some counseling would help?  Another thing is remember the saying "cooler heads prevail", instead of continuing a pointless argument that'll only get worse try taking a 1hr break then talking later.
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Online AncientMelody

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Re: I did a terrible thing :(
« Reply #2 on: July 09, 2014, 01:56:03 PM »
I really appreciate your thoughts. I currently am in psychotherapy with my psychiatrist once a month which is quite helpful. Going more frequently isn't really an option right now


My husband is a really good man, we have a good marriage but no matter how I try to get my point across he doesn't get it. It's live able but I'm tired of seeing it come back as "because of my self loathing" I am not the only guilty party. That's what frustrating.
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