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Author Topic: Appeal to logic, please help me =/  (Read 327 times)

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Offline Rasalhauge

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Appeal to logic, please help me =/
« on: July 06, 2014, 07:25:59 PM »
So, as some of you may or may not know Iīve been suffering from the most horrid ALS-scare ever known to man (of course this is just my subjective feeling). I guess Iīm just scared senseless by this crap. Iīm sick and tired of being afraid all the time, so I thought I might as well try this logical thinking-thing. My symptoms is mostly bulbar, thus the bulbar ALS-scare. Here are the things I have, perceived or not, to me they are there:

* tongue feels slow, sluggish and weak - I can say most words that Iīm usually able to, but if I speak my "regular" speed words just get jumbled up. When testing the tongue (from side to side, up and down, in and out, tenting cheeks etc etc), it tires really fast and gets sore.

The thing that bugs me the most is the constant fasciculations on my tongue, they are there all the time.

*same as above, but jaws - My jaws tires super fast, I canīt even chew things like toffee etc.

*Lips feels weak - hard to put the finger on what it is, but they feel almost numb. The result is that f-sounds (like saying f just plain and simple) gets almost "lispy".

*Swallowing/throat - It constantly feels as if I canīt swallow corectly, and I constantly get a (perhaps perceived) feeling of food getting stuck in throat. If I swallow small things the swallowing difficulties are even worse.

* Overall feeling of weakness, canīt tense facial muscles w/o getting trembling feeling in the muscles.

The most concerning thing is a dent in the upper part of my cheek (face) it becomes most apparent when I make a face, and then thereīs a nopticeable difference in bulk muscle size between left and right. Also have quite a crooked smile.

But...

Letīs say that my actual diagnoses (GAD/Depression/OCD) are causing most, or all, of the symptoms above. How could anxiety for example cause fatigue, weakness and twitching? I mean, what exactly makes anxiety more probable than some nast MND? My age (27)? Other factors such as the actual history of HA?

I know most of the symptoms above can in fact be explained by anxiety, but to me the problems seems soooo severe. So in my mind thereīs only two possibilites, either most of my symptoms are either (A) perceived or (B) actually caused by anxiety, OR they are caused by an actual illness.

If anxiety is the cause, how on earth can my symptoms stay for months? Isnīt anxiety symptoms supposed to be intermittent?

What I want to know, given the fact that Iīve seen my GP several times and been through a rather thorough neuro-exam conducted by a experienced psychiatric Dr. How many of those symptoms is most likelly caused by anxiety, and which symptoms (if any) are potential cause for concern?

Might be worth noting that the dent in my cheek could have been there all the time, just havenīt noticed it since I started checking myself in the mirror constantly
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“There is no greater sorrow than to recall in misery the time when we were happy.”

- Dante Alighieri

Offline Rasalhauge

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Re: Appeal to logic, please help me =/
« Reply #1 on: July 06, 2014, 07:55:10 PM »
Worth noting is that my voice get hoarse all the time, and Iīve had a sore and tight throat for at least 6 months now. BUT, if I was actually experiencing the onset of bulbar ALS, wouldnīt my symptoms progress rather exponentially? These symptoms listed in the precious post has been with me for more than 2-3 months at least, and havenīt progressed more than just a little.

I was able to ride MTB on forrest tracks for a total of 41km just two days ago, would that be doable if Iīve had ALS for 3 months?
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“There is no greater sorrow than to recall in misery the time when we were happy.”

- Dante Alighieri

Offline sixpack

  • no illogical conclusions please
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Re: Appeal to logic, please help me =/
« Reply #2 on: July 06, 2014, 08:19:53 PM »
MOST anxiety happens at the subconscious level.  JUST because you don't feel consciously anxious or had a day or two of calm doesn't mean your mind & body are relaxed.  It can take months of reduced anxiety before a body goes back to a more non-reactive state.
 


anxiety symptoms will last for as long as they scare you.  anxiety symptoms will last as long as a mind and body are amped up.  it is, at least partially, due to fight or flight.

finally,  I have been here 5+ yrs.  ALS is one of the more popular diseases to fret over.  there are probably thousands of posts about it.  In all the time here, NOT ONE CASE OF ALS.

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MOST anxiety occurs on a subconscious level.  JUST because you don't feel consciously anxious or had a day or two of calm doesn't mean your mind & body are relaxed.  It can take months of reduced anxiety before a body goes back to a more non-reactive state

Offline SkittishSari

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Re: Appeal to logic, please help me =/
« Reply #3 on: July 07, 2014, 01:41:39 AM »
I'm with you, with the same fear. :-/ I have pretty much the same symptoms you are describing and I am constantly thinking about it.
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Offline richdelb

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Re: Appeal to logic, please help me =/
« Reply #4 on: July 07, 2014, 10:37:50 AM »
anxiety symptoms will last for as long as they scare you.

I know that this somewhat steals the thread, but this is PROFOUND.  I think it's worth looking at over and over and over again.  Be it MS or ALS fears.  Read this line again.
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Offline adam4little

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Re: Appeal to logic, please help me =/
« Reply #5 on: July 19, 2014, 11:43:43 AM »
Hey all,

        Currently going through the exact same thing for 9 days. Let me just say, from personal experience, six-pack is right on the money (she always is--listen to her!) I first became acquainted with anxiety zone four years ago when, after a particularly stressful summer (where I was diagnosed with and receiving treatment for a benign, but nasty unheard at my age sexual function disorder--Peyronie's disease) I lost my sh*t when, after 3 years of being a vegetarian, I ate a lot of meat and screwed up my bowels. I became obsessed with narrow stool (thanks to Google, of course) and studied every stool and talked about every stool on here. No matter what I did, I couldn't get the diameter "just right" and I continually read all this conflicting information online: narrow stool was a sure sign of colon cancer/this was outdated medical knowledge and it wasn't an indicator of colon cancer, etc. Eventually, after a year of hell on earth and looking at every BM, I "moved on" to lymphoma, and of course continued to find lymph nodes all over my body. I could count upwards of 19 or 20 at one time (now? maybe 3 shotty ones).  Last summer, I was worried again about my bowels because I had some sticky, diarrhea and gas. So, guess what? For that whole summer (3 months) EVERY TIME I went to the bathroom, I had sticky, diarrhea, and of course terrible gas every night (and I am not really prone to gas). Finally, after again consulting Dr. Google, I read that floating stools, which Im pretty sure Ive always had, are a symptom of pancreatic cancer: guess what happens? all stools return to normal (you know, 3s, 4s and 5s on the Bristol Stool Scale) and EVERY stool floats. And Google says you know, this is accompanied by mid back pain especially when you x,y, and z, and you know oh ***** I have that too!! Etc etc etc etc etc

Anyway, sorry, that had a lot more to do with poo than I wanted it to. I assure you, I've thought about other things over the last couple of years. But, as six-pack pointed out, I've noticed a similar pattern, it usually starts one of two ways:

1) There's anxiety bubbling over (because you and I are anxious people) and it tells us, FIND ME SOMETHING TO FOCUS ON I AM HUNGRY, and so you , being the obedient slave that you are, start doing your checking. For me, 10 days ago, we lost power here thanks to Hurricane Arthur, and so, bored and without the internet haha and feeling some crazy anxiety, I go to the mirror and examine my tongue, in the dark, with a flashlight. Lo and behold I notice a dent on the left side, and so I wrench my tongue back and forth for what seems like an hour and a half, telling myself that after every examination I'll drop it and move on with my life, but I can't because anxiety is eating this up, and anxiety is building and getting stronger and stronger. Eventually, I let it go (mainly because I can't consult Google with no power) and I move on. Sure enough, the next day, because anxiety is hungry again, I look in the mirror and--yeah, you guessed it--I see a flickering on the left side of my tongue. Power's back on, I google, I fall head over heels into the ALS rabbit hole. I read about more symptoms, I check my tongue, I see these symptoms, anxiety builds, I read more symptoms, I check my tongue, anxiety builds, etc etc etc

2) Similar to the first, but with one key difference: the symptom, a minor bodily noise like a twitch or a headache or a backache or constipation, rears its head LIKE IT DOES IN EVERYBODY but because of your ol pal anxiety who is hungry (he's always hungry) you go to Google, knowing the results but unable to resist the compulsion, and you fall down the rabbit hole of x disease. The other day, I asked my girlfriend, a well adjusted person with very little anxiety, what kind of noise her body was creating for her at that moment. She said "my toe hurts" I asked her a few questions about how it hurt, etc. and we Googled it and the first result was Diabetic Neuropathy, and did you know that you can have Diabetes without knowing it, and in fact, x% of people present find their diabetes on routine exam, and that ALL toe pain that does not subside needs to be investigated by a doctor to rule out serious symptoms, and if you keep digging, you find studies where a small number of people with toe pain have terrible disease x after having test b and etc etc etc

Your brain is one of the wonders of this universe. It does so much. It's primary objective being to keep you alive, and so when you tell it that something is worrisome, it flags it as important, and a large percentage of it's capabilities(or actually, relatively small because it is that amazing but you know what I mean) become focused on that THING you are so afraid of (that thing that used to be a saber-toothed tiger, or a bear) and suddenly EVERYTHING that has anything at all to do with that thing in your mind is HIGHLIGHTED and presented to you in such a subjective, hellish, fear ridden light that to you it will always be that thing to fear, that thing to get the hell away from. And meanwhile, some other part of your amazing brain, continues to send it's impulse to that twitching tongue, or that tingly calf, or those loose bowels, or that strained eye, or that dry mouth, or that rapid heart beat, or that sore back, or that thing stuck in your throat, etc etc etc.

Etc etc etc.

Hang in there, bud. 
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