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Author Topic: I fell on my face again.  (Read 310 times)

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Offline amichael84

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I fell on my face again.
« on: July 04, 2014, 05:04:33 PM »
This doesn't really follow a standard poetic rhythm or rhyme. It's just how I feel.
____________

I fell on my face again.

Not physically, but nevertheless painful.
I tried to fly on my own, but my wings wouldn't lift me,
Who knew the distance from top of the mountain
to the bottom of the valley was so short?

I fell on face again.

I clawed my way back up the mountain
that threw my off so forcefully.
I gave it my all this time and it hurt.
I tried, OH GOD I TRIED,
But it was always easier to fall than the to fly.

I fell on my face again.
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: I fell on my face again.
« Reply #1 on: July 05, 2014, 06:26:31 AM »
There is such thing as prose poetry. That is what you have written. It is written well. Doesn't have to rhyme. Once there is a balance in the line size it always works well. I recall reading a prose poem elsewhere once and the line sizes were all over the place. The writer had a short line and the next one was so long that it got you lost when reading the poem. Your poem has a good balance to it.
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The Lovable Irish Rogue

Offline amichael84

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Re: I fell on my face again.
« Reply #2 on: July 05, 2014, 11:08:23 AM »
Thanks :)

I don't know how to edit my post, so please forgive the spelling/grammar mistakes.
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: I fell on my face again.
« Reply #3 on: July 05, 2014, 01:28:28 PM »
You only have a certain amount of time to edit any posts on here. Talking maybe 5 minutes after making the post. Then you can't do any editing at all. We all make mistakes when writing. Nothing to worry about there.
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The Lovable Irish Rogue

Offline redapples

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Re: I fell on my face again.
« Reply #4 on: July 06, 2014, 06:44:23 PM »
Great prose! Very well done indeed! :yes:
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Offline KellboRose

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Re: I fell on my face again.
« Reply #5 on: July 09, 2014, 05:09:29 AM »
I really like this.  I like writing sometimes too but I don't really know much about poetry other than what I like. Sometimes I read something someone wrote and I wish I'd thought to write it myself because it really makes sense to me. That's what I thought whenI read this :)
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