Its my first time posting. I really could do with some help.
I have been living with my fiancÚ for almost 2 years now. I was not the most understanding person
In the beginning. Understanding anxiety is hard I still don't fully understand I can't get it into her mind to understand her, when I do try and ask her things, I'm accused of getting into her mind.
During the past few months she has been avoiding me a lot. Spends a lot of time with friends and not that I mind but when I ask her if everything's OK. I am accused of owning her and I'm not happy for her.
I've noticed she has been drinking a lot more lately and I have been told its my fault and I'm driving her to drink.
We recently went out one day and she said she seen the way I was talking to a woman in the place we visited, I asked the woman who also works at the restaurant where the toilets were. I was accused of trying to pick her up.
I explained to her she worked there and I just laughed because to myself it was funny and I though she would see the funny side of it.
We were there with some of our friends, she became cold and distant towards me. When we returned home I was accused of doing and saying things on purposely because I know it affects her, She became enraged and started to physically lash out at me, I put my hands out to protect my face and held her hands so she wouldnt swing at me, it has happened on previous occasions she has lashed out. This time it was different, anyway long story short she called the police and accused me of trying to physically assault her. which is not true, most of the time I have no clue what it is I have done. It makes me go over my thoughts and I can't remeber or see anything I've done to affect her . Also she start saying a whole load of stuff about how she was a slave and felt like im only with her because I need her to take care of me. I'm accused of being last if just sitting down and being told I'm more interested in myself and I make her do everything. Never does she remember things I have done always things I have not done.
The thing is she talks so fast and switches from subject to subject it confuses me and I become frustrated and feel angry. Then I am accused of being angry and controlling and again I'm trying to control her. I also get told see...you did that on purpose etc
A lot of other stuff too its gotten worse in the past few months.
I try to ask her to slow down and she says I'm telling her what to do, now she has just left I called and we spoke I explained that I did not assault her and that I tried to stop her hitting myself.
She sadly on the other hand is absolutely 100% convinced without a shadow of a doubt that I raised my hands on her. When in fact I tried to on!y stop her. Now she is saying things like she knew she couldn't trust me, I was only trying to use her. Things I have never heard her say before, when I reminded her of something she said I am told she never said that or if she did say it she didn't mean to say it.
I've even doubted myself that maybe I did say and do those things, I had scratch marks on my face, anyone who knows me understands that I would never do anything like that. I had to stop her some how what happens if she ripped my eyes out.
I have never seen her like this before and it was a scary experience.
Has anyone else been accused of doing things by there OH that they have not. She is not going to therapy I have suggested she visit a Dr to help. I am then told I must have the problem and should go to see a Dr and she likes being the way she is. I have read some people are secretly addicted to there anxiety and only they know what means.
Am I imagining all this? Am I saying things? I really love her but I can't make sense of it and she refuses to speak to me. Its been almost 2 months. I thought with some time apart she might calm herself down and realize things and let herself work it out. Last time we spoke she said she wants to leave and that's it. Its like she does not care any more. I spoke to her friends and family and its like she has told them all these things that are not true.I also learned she has changed her friends and is talking about meeting someone else and has to try with someone else now. Its like the anxiety has just sabotaged everything.
Can GAD make someone think they have had sometthiig done to them that actually never happened.