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Author Topic: I'm New from New Hampshire  (Read 165 times)

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Offline CanSomeoneRelate?

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I'm New from New Hampshire
« on: June 26, 2014, 11:11:23 AM »
Hi Everyone. I am 23, from New Hampshire, and I have been suffering from many forms of anxiety since I was a little girl. I remember when it started, 4th grade, and if it rained outside or snowed, my mom was automatically dead. I used to panic, to the point where my mom got me a beeper in 5th grade and would send me a page every day at lunch so I knew she was alive.

It got better in middle school when I had a cell phone and could sneak and call her from the bathroom if I worried. By high school, I seemed to have outgrown it. Then it has recently moved on to my boyfriend of 5 years. I worry about his every move. I fear of crazy things happening, and if I can't get him on the phone, forget it. I panic and believe the worst-possible scenario had happened.

I worry about my health at times, depending on the circumstances, but not on a daily basis. For example, I looked up symptoms I was having online and I saw a possibility was Cancer. I had convinced myself I was dying and put my family through hell for 2 weeks. I think of the worst-possible situation, react to it, and believe it and I just want to know what it is like to live life without this suffocation.

My parents never got me help when I was young, but I attempted to get help myself from my doctor. I was put on Xanax and a few other medications to "try" and I feel like they made me worse and they gave me horrible night terrors. I stopped them immediately.

As of right now I am panicking that my boyfriend is not ok, even though I know he is safe at home and is probably doing the laundry or something which is why he hadn't answered my text yet. I panic about my little puppy getting out of the house, I panic about EVERYTHING and it is the worst feeling ever.

I feel like now I am depressed. I set my alarm for 15 min. before I have to leave for work every day and have no care to do anything. I just wish this would go away. My mother has similar anxiety to me and my grandma is a hypochondriac. I don't want to live life like them. I want to get rid of this suffocating feeling. I want happy thoughts! I want to enjoy the beautiful weather, not worrying that my loved ones have randomly taken a stroke and died.

I just hope someone can relate.. help...share their story... just so I am not alone. Even though my mom has it, she doesn't admit it, she's very controlling and self-centered, and I've just had enough.
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: I'm New from New Hampshire
« Reply #1 on: June 26, 2014, 02:28:54 PM »
Welcome to the forum. Good to have you as a member. Here you are with like minded people. People who understand. As we all suffer from something or other. So feel free to ask any questions. Our members are always willing to help others out. Good chatroom too. 3 posts to enter the room.

Find the correct section of the forum that suits your condition and create a new topic on it. This is just a welcome section. Never really get the same amount of help in this section as you would on the other sections of the forums. So whatever one suits the questions you are asking. Get much better answers.
All users of the chatroom must be 18 years old or over. The room is off limits to anybody under the age of 18.
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