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Author Topic: fake it until you make it  (Read 440 times)

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Offline shaggy

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fake it until you make it
« on: June 25, 2014, 07:33:15 PM »
My first therapist told me this when I told her about my social anxiety. I was thinking could this work for anxiety in general? Just believing that you are confident and happy and that everything is okay. Of course you have to exercise and go out more  but could that change your thought process and help get rid of anxiety? I've always wanted to be this person that was calm and friendly and everyone looked up to but my anxiety shut off all of those wants. If that did work, how long do you think until you start to notice change? I've done something like this once and people did notice a change but whenever I hit a bump, it would bring me back to square one because I couldn't take the failure. Any thoughts?
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Offline shaggy

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #1 on: June 26, 2014, 01:07:10 AM »
No one, huh?
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Offline redapples

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #2 on: June 26, 2014, 01:35:05 AM »
I've tried the fake it til you make it, myself. It's worked sometimes, but not lately. Perhaps because we are feeling so many physical symptoms, they are hard to ignore, and it's hard to fake it. If it were that easy, we wouldn't have anxiety, right?

When my anxiety was mostly under control, yes, faking that I might be apprehensive would work. But not when I'm feeling anxious constantly.  :action-smiley-065:
Remember, those bumps in the road ....try not to think of them as failure. Failure, to me, is giving up and it doesn't seem that you're giving up. Be gentle to yourself.
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Offline shaggy

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #3 on: June 26, 2014, 01:37:19 AM »
Yeah that makes sense. I know it won't take your actual symptoms away but I thought maybe it would change how to think about them. Idk. I haven't tried yet.
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Offline redapples

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #4 on: June 26, 2014, 01:40:53 AM »
I think the worst thing we can do is try to fight the feeling. For me, it only makes it more intense. I've been trying some exposure therapy lately, allowing myself to feel that uncomfortable feeling or feelings until they pass. Def. not easy! But there is a sense of accomplishment when it passes, and I haven't run back to my comfort zone.

See my post about GAD turning to Agoraphobia. I'd like your input if you can relate.
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Offline AncientMelody

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2014, 10:01:41 AM »
In my experience "fake it till you mail it has it's purpose, but does not aid recovery or healing. To me it's like treading water, helping hold steady until the storm passes. So again it's been useful to some degree but it is not what moves me forward. Exercise, journaling, medication, therapy.... Those are all components I need to "make it"
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Offline Sarahb2904

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #6 on: June 27, 2014, 08:42:21 AM »
I've been faking it for a long time, pretending I was fine etc, but it just makes things worse as you're not actually dealing with the issues in hand, just my personal view x
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Offline asuka07

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #7 on: June 27, 2014, 11:25:21 AM »
Yup, I am currently trying to "fake it until I make it"

Unfortunately for me I feel its something I have to do because for so long I've hid from what causes my anxieties and then that causes me anxiety.  I am afraid of moving forward and afraid of going back to my safety zone.  So thats why I feel like I have to fake it till I make it  ::)  Its tough sometimes (woke up feeling like crap this morning) but sometimes I feel real hopeful and happy and thats what keeps me going.
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Offline shaggy

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #8 on: June 27, 2014, 01:47:17 PM »
But can't you say the same for distraction techniques and things that redirect the mind away from anxiety? Its just avoiding until you feel better, not really addressing issues. I thought that what helps is accepting. I've been exercising and been distracted a lot and when a negative thoughts comes up, I just accept it and move on. I've also been trying to 'fake it until I make it' and I've been feeling way better. Not all gone but I didn't think it would go away overnight. Fingers crossed. Just my thoughts though.
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Online braves0042

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #9 on: June 27, 2014, 04:22:20 PM »
I have been trying that today, and sometimes it is working and others i have an episode here and there. Not a bad idea to try but if the anxiety is too over powering at a certain time it can be hard to do that
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Offline dbirm77

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #10 on: June 28, 2014, 09:29:35 AM »
I completely agree with this methodology. Like all other techniques, this takes a great deal of time and practice. Any technique that promotes living life outwardly instead of getting caught in your own head, is good advice. It doesn't mean that you should try to ignore your anxiety, it means get back to living your life...with anxiety if need be. Just don't allow anxiety to stop you from doing anything. I can't tell how often I suffered through basic tasks like going food shopping but after a while a crazy thing happens...you begin to build confidence. Then life slowly becomes a little easier.
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Expect.....anxiety to come.
Accept.....anxiety and all it's sensations.
Ask.........anxiety for more!

Rinse and repeat!

Offline never quit

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Re: fake it until you make it
« Reply #11 on: June 28, 2014, 01:23:13 PM »
I agree completely with previous post.

I've been searching for the "source" of my anxiety since 1996. There are a lot of things about my life that I think have led to it, but most of the time, it comes up with no apparent cause or reason. Like NOW for instance.

If I curl up and check out, it just gets worse. So today I got a haircut, groceries, watered the plants... just kept moving through it. I'm going to go cut the grass next. Then a support group meeting and probably a workout. I'm a big believer in exposure therapy. It builds confidence. Mostly.

At the same time, I also firmly believe in feeling it, like another poster said. Don't fight it, roll with it. Easier said than done, right? And those lifestyle things... I've had too much caffeine today, not too smart. Coming off Abilify which is making me fat, could be a factor.

Right, about chemicals... my anxiety is caused mostly by some screwup in my nervous system, so I know I need meds, probably forever. I try to separate that. I keep trying different combinations. Latuda is the next. Main thing for me is to not lose hope. For every crappy day, there's good days. There's nothing wrong with working on a positive attitude. Rather difficult for me at the moment, however!
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