Hey Everyone - I'm new to this forum and just actually posted an introduction but I saw this Hypochondria section afterwards and feel posting here better relates to my situation. I'm hoping someone here will be able to relate with me and have experienced some similar symptoms but mostly I'm just looking for support.
I'm 18 years old. I guess I have always been someone who worries, even as a little girl I would worry about small things that seemed completely irrational to most people - even my doctor told me at age 11 that I showed symptoms of the on-set of anxiety. But my anxiety as a kid and even throughout all of my teenage years never even close to controlling my life, it never completely shut me down like it did to me 6 months ago. I started my first semester of university and everything seemed fine at first - I had never been more excited for anything in my life. Then I started to develop ridiculously weird symptoms that were completely out of the ordinary for me. I was exhausted all the time. I would sleep for 12 hours and miss class (which is not like me at all). I had no energy and my entire body felt weak. I was dizzy, nauseous and overall I just felt extremely ill. I ignored it at first until I started developing full blown panic attacks where I would wake up my roommates at 2am to help try and calm me down because my heart would beat out of my chest, breathing would become so difficult and I would uncontrollably shake. This happened multiple times and I have made a few post-midnight trips to the ER. Every doctor who has ever seen me has told me I have anxiety, okay I get it but I feel as if they are completely ignoring my long list of symptoms. Whatever is going on with me has completely taken over my life, I feel debilitated and can no longer function - definitely not how I used to.
I've had almost every test in the book done - and the ones that I haven't had I still want it just takes some convincing on my part to get my doctors to send me for the tests. I've given more blood and urine samples then anyone should ever have to give in their life. All normal. I've had a few different ultrasounds done - focusing on my abdominal and chest area, all normal. I've had chest X-RAY's done and they were fine. I've had several EKG's done on me because of how many times I truly thought I was having a heart attack or had some sort of cardiovascular disease. They were all also normal. I had a CT scan done on my head because of how bad and frequently I get headaches. The scan was also normal. I have had a colonoscopy recently done because I used to sleep on my bathroom floor crying over how bad the nausea was. That came back also normal.
I feel as if I'm at a dead end. I have had so many tests done and every single thing comes back completely fine but yet I still feel so terribly sick. I'm scared I won't be able to return to university this coming fall and I have already lost my very good summer job (that was not easy to get at all). My biggest downfall has got to be Google. Because when I look up the symptoms I'm experiencing it sends my mind on a rampage and I begin to freak out. I can convince myself I have any disease in the book. My doctor is now telling me he knows I have anxiety and wants to treat me for it but I am so hesitant on taking prescription medications for something that I do not believe I have. I don't know what to do anymore. My list of symptom includes but is not limited to the following:
- Horrible and frequent headaches (head pressure)
- Eye Problems (Seeing spots - can't focus)
- Extreme Nausea
- Constipation and Diarrhea (always alternating between the two)
- Face & Body Numbness
- Absolutely no energy
The list honestly goes on and on....
I know most people reading this (if you kept reading that is) will think I'm crazy - and honestly who knows? Maybe I am. All I know is that my life feels like it has been snatched from me and that I would do absolutely anything in the entire world to feel better again - to feel like I used to. I don't want to wake up every day thinking I'm going to die anymore. I want to be better I just have no idea what to do.
If anyone can relate or provide absolutely any insight or support it would be very very much appreciated.