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Author Topic: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam  (Read 234 times)

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Offline Walnut

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Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« on: June 02, 2014, 10:00:23 PM »
JUst want to vent a little past month or two my intrusive thoughts have all but disappeared. All I am left with having to get back out and go places and challenge my anxiety and move forward. Things seemed like I might finally be coming out of this relapse. Then today I was sitting outside, my 3 kids running around, my niece and my great nephew who Ive been raising for almost a year. A thought came. "You're all alone!" Then I realized that my wife was at work and my  brother and his family that live in across the street were all gone. I knew my  mother was on the other side of town doing chemotherapy. My dad was at work. My other brother who lives down the road was not home and wasnt answering his phone.
I started to panic. I tried to tell myself this is just a thought, nothing else. No reason to panic. Everything was fine. Im telling myself damn dude, you are a 33 year old man, you dont need someone to be here with you!
The stress of a 14, 10, 9, 6 and 1 year old all running around misbehaving, being kids, depending on me for stuff just felt so overwhelming. I tried to battle through it. I tried to think rationally but the anxiety lingered. Luckily it wasnt long before my mom come pulling up at the house after her doctor visit. I felt instant relief. Finally someone here.
Pisses me off so much that I seem to not have much self confidence in my abilities to deal with anxiety anymore. Its like I feel like I need someone around, someone close like a relative. I swear this is just becoming so overbearing. All I can say is F.M.L. , what a year this has been.
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My screen name used to be "Nutty" Ive been a member since 2008. I forgot what email I used back then so I cant login to my old name.

Offline healyshouse

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Re: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« Reply #1 on: June 03, 2014, 04:29:27 AM »
dude set backs are a normal part of the recovery process. it can make you feel as if your back to sqaure one... dont pay it any attention live your life feeling horbile with the thoughts popping in its just anxiety trying to pull you back in the loop..


if you question the thoughts or try to get rid or try change how you feel then you are letting it win

again no questioning no trying to change how you feel just live your life with it besdide you it can hurt you so why bother with it.

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" you will never get better until you stop trying to get better" By Paul David author of " at last a life"

Offline gtripoli

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Re: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« Reply #2 on: June 03, 2014, 01:46:27 PM »
again no questioning no trying to change how you feel just live your life with it besdide you it can hurt you so why bother with it.

Pretty sure you meant "it can't hurt you". :)

I agree, I have had many setbacks, some small some large. It's pretty normal from all the experiences I have read on these forums.

When you get knocked down, the only thing that matters is that you get back up.
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Offline healyshouse

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Re: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« Reply #3 on: June 04, 2014, 03:00:19 AM »
yea i meant it cant hurt you
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" you will never get better until you stop trying to get better" By Paul David author of " at last a life"

Offline Walnut

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Re: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« Reply #4 on: June 05, 2014, 01:56:05 PM »
lol, yeah i got what you meant. thanks for the replies. been better since that day til i went to the post office today i got very panicky. tried to use my old tricks and just make myself sit through it to prove to myself this is just anxiety again,
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I am horrible about forgetting which threads I have replied to. If you dont get a reply back from me feel free to message me.

My screen name used to be "Nutty" Ive been a member since 2008. I forgot what email I used back then so I cant login to my old name.

Offline Swedishworry

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Re: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« Reply #5 on: June 16, 2014, 03:38:05 PM »
Try tp relax and remember that it will pass and you will feel good again. I know its not easy but i promise you that it will pass:) life is up and down:)
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Offline Walnut

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Re: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« Reply #6 on: June 18, 2014, 12:39:51 AM »
thanks for the reply  :happy0151:
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I am horrible about forgetting which threads I have replied to. If you dont get a reply back from me feel free to message me.

My screen name used to be "Nutty" Ive been a member since 2008. I forgot what email I used back then so I cant login to my old name.

Offline healyshouse

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Re: Had a good month or two finally! Then bam
« Reply #7 on: June 18, 2014, 08:41:08 AM »
no one that has recovered from anxiety has a straight road journey.... plenty of ups and downs along the way.. just remember to never avoid.. never try to change the situtation..

you did the correct thing sat in the post office while your anxiety was high and at the end you seen that nothing of what came to mind was true.. thus a false fear..

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" you will never get better until you stop trying to get better" By Paul David author of " at last a life"

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