Hi MH, and welcome to Anxiety Zone! My name is Chuck, and I am one of the Global Moderators here on the site.
You are now a member of our community, where you will find support and advice from other members in similar situations. It's always nice to find someone else who understands, and to know you're not alone.
We have sections in the forum that address specific concerns, so feel free to post or start a new topic in the section that best fits your situation. Feel free to explore the rest of the forum. You may find the other topics helpful, and you may be able to offer advice or support to someone else.
We also have a chat room for members over the age of 18. Once you have made three meaningful posts, you will be allowed access to the chat room.
MH, it might becoming apparent to you that many anxiety and/or depressant disorders are chronic, lifelong conditions. These disorders have a true organic origin. If you had diabetes that required insulin everyday to protect your health and live a normal lifestyle, I would assume you would take it. Anxiety and depression can be no different. I suffer from panic disorder with panic attacks, I'm on anti-depressant therapy, and I plan on being on an anti-depressant for the rest of my life.
Here is a quote from Insights (Ian), who spends a great deal of time on the Medications and Therapy section of the forum, replying to member's questions...
"Apart from Paxil (paroxetine), there is no clear evidence that antidepressants harm the fetus. Some studies have found increased incidences of rare birth defects, however, these have been mostly small scale and there is little consistency in the defects found which suggests the findings owe more to statistical 'noise' than an effect of the meds.
You need to also be aware that uncontrolled maternal anxiety and/or depression can harm the baby too, both immediately and in the longer term. Babies born to anxious or depressed mothers tend to have lower birth weights (PDF), be born prematurely and have impaired neuronal development (PDF). As children and adults they are more prone to asthma, dyslexia and to have learning difficulties. They are also much more likely to develop anxiety disorders and/or depression later in life.
If you're planning to start a family I urge you to thoroughly explore you options with you family doctor and either an obstetrician or gynecologist." Insights (Ian)
Some very good food for thought...
Again, welcome to Anxiety Zone, MH. The very best to you!... Chuck