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Author Topic: Overwhelming fear of going schizophrenic causing/ caused by panic  (Read 148 times)

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Offline dent67

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I've been getting panic attacks off and on for almost 3 years now.  I can go months of feeling great, no issues then I will get hurt working out or sick or something which throws me off track and I find myself waking up in the middle of the night consumed by panic.  This latest bout has been pretty rough because there's no real external thing I can pin it on, the only stressor is that I am moving at the end of the month (and work as usual).

My attacks constantly revolve around the fear that I am going schizophrenic, or manic, or severely depressed.  That nothing will get better and I'll have to be hospitalized or I'll hurt someone or myself and let everyone down.  My fear revolves around those central themes, and I can't seem to dig myself out of it.  I have this pervasive worry that I am loosing my mind and I just can't, I can't let everyone down like that.  I have people relying on me.

I am against taking any medication so I'm looking for CBT or other natural intervention techniques.  I don't want to take meds because I was a drug abuser and drinker for a few years and I just don't want to run any more chemicals through my body.  I guess I've got a fear of medication because I abused prescription drugs and I feel that I can manage without them.

Thanks for the help, going through a rough patch here.
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Offline Julie A. Cook

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Dent, feel your pain.  I have been having panic for the last 8 months, same fear of going crazy or being institutionalized.  People ike us never do go cazy, we just drive ourselves crazy.  We are responsible, conscientious people and we're never going to let anyone down.

I have worked with cognitive behavioural therpaist and see a psychiatrist as well.  I also take meds.  Meds do take some experimentation, so I understand your being loathe to try them. 

After 8 months of this, I realize I'm not going to go insane or die or lose my mind during one of my attacks.  It's just the same old negative rut.

I try to think positive thoughts and be mindful and present in situations.  It's not easy.

Good luck to you,

Julie
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Offline dent67

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Thanks Julie.  It helps knowing that I am not alone, finding this forum has done wonders. 

Also reminding myself that if I was truly 'going crazy' then I wouldn't be aware of it.  If crazy people knew they were crazy then there would be no crazy people.

Thanks for the help
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