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Author Topic: How to overcome attitude of subjugation/emasculation?  (Read 274 times)

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Offline hilario

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How to overcome attitude of subjugation/emasculation?
« on: May 10, 2014, 11:04:56 PM »
I have an older brother who is quite a bit stronger and more successful than me (better looking as well). For the longest time he's actively intimidated me in order to get what he wants or to satisfy some sort of complex (sometimes I do feel sorry for him, he was bullied a lot growing up). I've come to the realization lately that my extreme avoidance of confrontation, my defeatism, and the sensation of hatred from strangers all traces back to this long intimidation. Has anyone else experienced this, and if so, what helped you conquer it?
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Offline Caribou

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Re: How to overcome attitude of subjugation/emasculation?
« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2014, 04:52:39 PM »
I swear it's almost as if I typed this myself...I am EXACTLY the same way.  I have an older brother who has received numerous comments from girls because of his looks, while I get nothing.  He demeaned me all my life, insulted me, etc.  I try and avoid confrontation and consider myself a misanthrope because I cannot stand strangers.  How I deal with it, is that I just simply continue on with my life and eventually my success will come.  My brother for example may get the girls and be better looking, but he has a long list of problems to go with that.  He drinks frequently, and has had an on and off again drug problem for a good chunk of his life.  Also, every single relationship he has had, the girl has dumped him because of his problems.  It's quite funny because here I am, a guy who will (while not being a pushover) treat a girl with respect, yet they choose my brother all the time.  He is 29 years old but certainly doesn't act like it.

I use him as a mode of inspiration, because I DON'T want to end up like him.  Therefore, in order for me to do that, I need to do my best in school.  He never went to college and barely passed high school.  I think you just need to keep your head above everything else and do what I did.  I will admit that it won't be easy (as I have found out), but it can be done.
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