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Author Topic: Fear of going Crazy/Being the next hitler?  (Read 353 times)

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Offline TheCivilYoshi

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Fear of going Crazy/Being the next hitler?
« on: May 06, 2014, 12:22:33 PM »
Okay, im here to talk about a sort of odder fear i've had.

Ever sense i had developed OCD i've had all sorts of anxiety from hearing about "Crazy" people who snap and go on a killing spree and kill themselves etc. I always fear im going to become like these people. Another fear i have is the fear of becoming the next hitler, because i share similar traits to him, one of them being my ocd. (The traits are extremely minor, one particular physical one that is sort of awkward to speak about. i wasn't really abused physically as a child, i dont have a constant urge to control people, infact i believe people should just live life as they please without having harm done to them, because life is hard for everyone and we're all just trying our best to get by)

Im slightly paranoid but that's because of my anxiety. I don't think people are out to get me or anything, but im slightly jumpy when i shouldn't be due to my anxiety. It all started happening when i used to walk home as a kid and had (And still do to some extent) This overwhelming fear of getting shot in a drive by or killed from behind without even knowing.

I know these fears shouldn't be taken too seriously, but whenever the name gets mentioned i always go back to my "Magical" thinking, assuming its a sign that im going to become him. Once again, i know this isn't physically possible, but it scares me highly.

I fear that one day i'll go down the same path, try to do something i love, get rejected, and blame society Etc. I dont want this to happen obviously, but i was wondering if anyone else could relate/ Share stories because i feel really alone when i talk about this type of stuff, and im too scared to talk to my parents as i know they'll just laugh or probably insult me for thinking this way.
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Offline Anxiousmind77

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Re: Fear of going Crazy/Being the next hitler?
« Reply #1 on: May 07, 2014, 10:39:38 AM »
Hi ThecivilYoshi, I can relate to what you are saying. OCD is very tricky. It wants you to over think these thoughts, it wants you to find some sort of logic. But in all reality there is no logic. There is no magic answer. You have OCD. And that's it. One thing I do believe is people w OCD probably have very vivid imaginations. I know I do. So we are able to think up these sort of crazy ideas and then we run w them. I wish I could use my crazy imagination for something bigger and better than scaring myself sick lol.

As far as the hitler thing goes, I would not worry about this. You say in your post, you kno you would never be like him. You have compassion when it comes to people and I see that. Be easy on yourself. Keep pushing on. Take care :)
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Offline andrea34

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Re: Fear of going Crazy/Being the next hitler?
« Reply #2 on: May 17, 2014, 03:26:43 PM »
I am feeling very vulnerable. Can anybody relate or offer any words of wisdom?
I have severe intrusive thoughts that I obsess over. I am going thru a lot and I just started taking an antidepressant 4 days ago. I have a severe fear that I'm going to lose touch with reality so I'm constantly checking my surroundings and checking to make sure I remember who I am. These thoughts are scary and I'm scared there is something seriously wrong.
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Offline Myocdragon

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Re: Fear of going Crazy/Being the next hitler?
« Reply #3 on: May 23, 2014, 11:16:58 PM »
Hey Thecivilyoshi,
I agree with what anxiousmind77 had to say. OCD is tricky as anything. And the thing is, there's no "odder" fears with OCD. They run the gamut. When I was very young I had a fear for years and years that I was going to forget how to swallow. The thought still occasionally pops up. It just doesn't cause me enough anxiety to really stick anymore, but when I was little, it was a real issue. But I don't think it's any more or less odd than your hitler fear. OCD makes us have all these fears, drums up our anxieties. That's what it does.

Oh, and you know how you say that whenever the name gets mentioned it's a trigger for you? Well about ten years ago my OCD was really focused on getting lung cancer. And I saw signs everywhere. Every time I opened a magazine, or turned on tv, or drove past a billboard, there was always some mention of cancer, and if was sure that it was a sign. Eventually that particular anxiety passed, and I stopped seeing all the signs. They're all still there, I just stopped seeing them.

Our OCD is crazy good at finding these signs. If someone with OCD had a fear of becoming the where's Waldo guy, he could pick him out of every single page of those books in two seconds.

Freaking OCD.

But as tricky as it is, it's treatable, especially when you combine therapy with meds.

Good luck. You're a good person with a bad disorder.
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I'm not crazy, I've just lost my mind

Offline gtripoli

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Re: Fear of going Crazy/Being the next hitler?
« Reply #4 on: June 02, 2014, 01:35:30 AM »
It wants you to over think these thoughts, it wants you to find some sort of logic. But in all reality there is no logic. There is no magic answer. You have OCD. And that's it.

Exactly!

Thoughts are just thoughts, and your mind is not who you are.
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