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Author Topic: Terrified of MS!  (Read 240 times)

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Offline jayzi

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Terrified of MS!
« on: April 24, 2014, 01:54:38 PM »
I have a really bad fear of multiple sclerosis, I am 15, before I thought I had a brain tumour but that is no longer a fear to me as I am used to it, almost like my body has accepted I have one.

My symptoms which all are related to MS:
- muscle twitching/spasms, all over, gets worse at night
- very itchy all over
- feel "spaced out"/everything feels unreal (not dizziness)
- legs sometimes feel weak
- feel scared and shaky inside
- often depressed
- feel like I'm going to faint when standing up, even when blood pressure is normal (but too high in my opinion)
- everything feels unreal
- eyes ache and my left eye's vision is worse than my right's
- random sharp head pains which last a few seconds

I am so scared, I got out of bed this morning and felt so weak and shaken up, I don't know if this is worry. This has been going on for 4 months, how can just worry be causing all of this? I just cannot stop reading about it.
I just picture myself in a wheelchair in 15 years, unable to function, living on drugs for the rest of my life.
A week ago my doctor referred me to a neurologist, and she seems concerned about my muscle twitching/spasms and headaches. I am tired of waiting, I just want an MRI to see what's wrong. I still haven't heard any news on when I'll see the neurologist, how long does this usually take?
Thanks in advance..
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Offline alicat18

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Re: Terrified of MS!
« Reply #1 on: April 24, 2014, 03:58:03 PM »
Hello.  I'm fairly new here and often come here to "talk myself off the ledge" as I'm a diagnosed hypochondriac in treatment.  It all started with a fear of MS and I want to share my story because it will help some/many of you afraid of this disease.  At age 12, my heel went numb.... at age 14, my lip went numb, and so on and so forth through my life (I'm now 37) I experienced all of the below -

Anywhere - YOU NAME IT - all over the body numbness that shows up in patches (patches of dead skin to varying degrees)
Arm paralysis
Weakness of the legs and arms/hands
Ear ringing
Double vision (diagnosed diplopia caused by a 3rd nerve palsy where I couldn't see straight for 6 weeks)
Tongue paralysis
Tongue numbness/taste problems
Wooshing in ears

Pretty much every neurological prob one could have, I've had!  In the beginning, I'd just go to my GP and they'd blow me off.. when I got my first bout of double vision, however, at age 27, I got into a neuro-opthamologist in NYC who ran MRIs and the whole nine yards (first MRIs for me, but I had had symptoms for over 10 years).. 100% clear, showed noting, vision went back to normal.  Since then, have probably seen 6 different neurologists, and eventually started going to MS specialists bc I wanted to be tracked/taken seriously.  I've had about 10 rounds of MRIs, a spinal tab, blood work, the whole work up.  Nothing has showed up that would point to MS.  My scans have been done on the best MRI machines there are!  Seen Drs in some of the best hospitals on the east coast and my current "doctor" is an MS specialist and has point blank told me "I don't have it.".  He said that as crazy as it sounds, he has a lot of patients who just have random neuro symptoms that no one figures out.  Does that mean I'll never get diagnosed..?  Who knows.  But I'll tell you what, if this is MS and I've had it for 25 years, it is what it is and I'll be OK.  I take the best care of myself possible and I'm always working on my anxiety problem surrounding my health (I pretty much hop from disease to disease like many of you... therapy is helping me, I may go on Zoloft). 

Anyway, wanted to share this as I am a case of someone who is a text book MS patient and has all clear tests... I know that stress activates my symptoms. I'm OK.  Most of the posts I read in here about people afraid of MS I can promise you that you don't have it.  I have always wanted to respond w my story and now I have.

Hope it helps!
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Offline jayzi

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Re: Terrified of MS!
« Reply #2 on: April 24, 2014, 04:18:06 PM »
Wow, thanks so much! I hope my MRI will come back clean.
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