Glad to find this site. I am a 50 year old single dude, living alone, never married, 11 years sober, very high-functioning professional who has cyclical bouts of intense anxiety and depression. I have had an excruciating day.
This all started with panic disorder in 1996. The lowest point was late 2008, 2009 when I went to the hospital, four admissions, four weeks total.
Diagnoses: GAD, not connected to anything in particular. I have trouble with down times, when it's quiet.
Major Depressive Disorder: This one is tricky, it is more cyclical, when it hits, it's different than normal depression. I feel intense grief, pain and agitation, this happened today. Sundays are tough for me.
As for meds I have tried: Kind of all of them? SSRIs, SNRIs, atypical antipsychotics, Lamictal, Lyrica, and of course klonopin and its family members. Currently I am taking 100 mgs of Pristiq and about 1.25 mgs of klonopin daily. I was recently taking Lyrica and quit because while effective, I was gaining a lot of weight. I've also taken Abilify, max 2 mgs, also not on that at the moment.
Symptoms: Intense flushing signals an anxiety attack. It can last for hours and sometimes days. There is a continuous sense of doom, like I'm next in line for the electric chair.
Good things that I do: I exercise. A LOT. I don't drink, but smoke. I meditate. I do a bit of yoga. I play guitar in a band, I'm not bad. I have learned a lot about this condition. These conditions. I have a shrink and a good therapist. I'm solid financially, very successful in an intensively competitive field (journalism).
My quality of life is poor, to put it mildly. I look forward to exploring this site and offering and receiving support. Today is about as bad as it gets for me. I would go to the ER but there's no point in it. Sometimes the only thing that keeps me going is the knowledge that these stretches don't last.
Thanks to anyone for reading and hopefully responding.