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Author Topic: home alone  (Read 171 times)

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Offline darkerqt1

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home alone
« on: April 17, 2014, 11:04:16 AM »
So I will be alone for two weeks. I had moved in with my grandparents to help take care of them while they were ill. My mother also moved in so they could have 24 hour round care. They both recently passed away and my anxiety started back after this. My mother is leaving for a few weeks to go out of town and I will be alone in the house by myself. Normally I would enjoy this time to myself since I have been couped up with my family for the last 6 months. However with anxiety back in my life I feel scared to be alone right now. Does anyone else have issues with this. Does anyone else feel that they handle their anxiety better when others are around?
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Offline worldbeat99

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Re: home alone
« Reply #1 on: April 19, 2014, 04:12:37 AM »
That's natural to feel you can handle your anxiety better when others are around you.  Do you think you might have a friend stay over now and then?
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Offline darkerqt1

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Re: home alone
« Reply #2 on: April 19, 2014, 06:11:47 AM »
I don't think any friends will be able to. Its easter weekend and everyone is going out of town for a few days. maybe later into next week. Its just up until now I have only had anxiety attacks but being alone I feel I might have a full fledged panic attack and those suck.
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: home alone
« Reply #3 on: April 19, 2014, 06:24:54 AM »
It is like you are already expecting a panic attack reading your words. You might have one does not mean you will have one. You might win the lottery as well. Just try and keep yourself busy. Give yourself things to do. Some music on. Some films to watch. Never let the house seem quiet. That way it will seem like others are there also. It is only when things begin to get quiet that the mind can begin to take over. For all you know you might have a good few days. You are simply thinking ahead of yourself.
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Offline darkerqt1

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Re: home alone
« Reply #4 on: April 19, 2014, 06:32:52 AM »
I feel silly. I thought I had beaten this. Now that it is back every chest pain and numb arm means I am having a heart attack and even though it always passes I convince myself that maybe I am not going to have a heart attack but it is some under laying heart issue. I recently went back and read my post from years ago when it was bad and I cant help but think how much of a lunatic I must have seemed like. Only difference this time around is I know what anxiety is and that in itself helps a lot. I am weeks away from driving across country for the first time in my life by myself to visit family. And I have no idea how I will make it through. I haven't had a full blown panic attack yet. Thank God! Those suck and feel like I am having a heart attack. But I am almost certain that this is what will happen when I have to drive that far. I struggle with driving around my own town I don't know how ill make it across country. and at the current moment I just need to make it through the next few weeks by myself. The thing I am most worried about is when I lay in bed and try and sleep at night. That's when my anxiety is at its worst. and being alone and facing that. well im just not looking forward to it.
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