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Author Topic: Hello from Cyprus.  (Read 107 times)

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Offline Deboulla

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Hello from Cyprus.
« on: April 14, 2014, 03:35:54 AM »
I stumbled upon this site yesterday while trying to work out what the hell is wrong with me......it's amazing how many others feel exactly the same as me. It's nice to know that I'm not going insane  :spineyes:.

I'm 43 and have a nearly 3 year old son and I have suffered on and off what what appears to be HA since I was 23. I have never seen anyone nor told anyone how I feel so finding this site has been amazing. When I was 23 my mum was diagnosed with hodgkins lymphoma in the early stages, she had treatment and went on to be clear. A few months after she was given the all clear, I accidentally touched a gland in my neck and thought it was swollen. I was terrified and went to the doctors in such a state, convinced I had the same as my mum. My gp at the time was very understanding and told me I did not have HL and that my gland was only a tiny bit enlarged, and that was because I kept prodding it. She told me to stop touching it and I was fine. Since then every time I had anything wrong, I would blow it all out of proportion and make myself sick with worry. Pretty much any small sympton I have = cancer of some kind.  Ten years ago, my mum was diagnose with gall stones and sent for a ultrasound scan. They discovered a huge mass on her ovary which they thought was a cyst. Long story short, and a lot of medical errors made.....she went for surgery to remove the 'cyst' which  was a tumor, measuring 30cm in diameter and weighing a couple of kilos. The biopsy showed that it was again cancer, but luckily it hadn't spread somehow, to anywhere else. Since then I have been very bad and imagine I have every illness imaginable.

Since my son was born I have been much worse, and now I'm starting to think HE is also seriously Ill....at the weekend I rushed him to the doctor as I was convinced he had meningitits......obviously he hasn't, he had tonsillitis. This week I have diagnosed myself with blood clots in the lung, GI bleeding, bowel cancer, pneumonia, lung cancer, heart failure......and many more. I suffer terribly with night sweats, day sweats,  feeling of dread that hangs over me for days, I think about who would take care of my son if I die.

A year ago I broke my ankle very badly and have pins and plates and screws holding me together. I must take the metalwork out on 9 June, and am terrified that they are going to discover some terminal illness through routine blood tests and ECG before my op.

I hate feeling like this, and don't know how to stop. From today I have banned myself from googling, after readin all your posts  :winking0008:. I guess that's the first step. 

Thanks for reading, if you make it to the end!
Debbie.
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Offline Cuchculan

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Re: Hello from Cyprus.
« Reply #1 on: April 14, 2014, 09:27:32 AM »
Welcome to the forum. Good to have you as a member. Here you are with like minded people. People who understand. As we all suffer from something or other. So feel free to ask any questions. Our members are always willing to help others out. Good chatroom too. 3 posts to enter the room.

Find the correct section of the forum that suits your condition and create a new topic on it. This is just a welcome section. Never really get the same amount of help in this section as you would on the other sections of the forums. So whatever one suits the questions you are asking. Get much better answers.
All users of the chatroom must be 18 years old or over. The room is off limits to anybody under the age of 18.
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Offline Potatoes

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Re: Hello from Cyprus.
« Reply #2 on: April 14, 2014, 12:41:33 PM »
I'm in class right now, but very interested on your post welcome to the board, I'm eager to read this post!
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A cemetery where I marry the sea.

Offline Deboulla

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Re: Hello from Cyprus.
« Reply #3 on: April 15, 2014, 05:15:21 AM »
Thank you both for the welcome, it seems my obsession with Google has now been replaced by my obsession with this site...... It makes me feel better than google!

I have not googled since my first post......it's sooo hard but am determined to beat this.

Today I am concerned about my temperature which seems to fluctuate between normal and low grade fever all day....... It never ends  ::)
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Offline ileen327

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Re: Hello from Cyprus.
« Reply #4 on: April 15, 2014, 01:10:01 PM »
Hi there, I am Debbie, just joined last night. I know what you mean about obsessing. I was just diagnosed with anemia and had a colonoscopy to see if I was bleeding yesterday. Good news, it is not my colon. I am 62 and the dr. scared me last week with the urgent colonoscopy. Well, that was clear, so now what! Well, I have been Goggling like mad and am totally sure that I have some cancer. I called the Dr. but no news from other blood work yet. The nurse there is not friendly at all. I have been obsessing all day long. I still feel crummy from yesterday and no real appetite and I can not concentrate at all. I just want answers today about what I have, but that won't happen. My husband is really sick of me and my anxiety. I have had health anxiety all my life, mostly worrying about nothing. I get extra beats... a lot lately , now I read that can be anemia, but I will not bore you with all the things I could be having with anemia. But, I know them all now and believe me I will get them all! I hate this. I am 62 years old and feel like a fool!!!
 Wasting my life, instead of living it! I am sorry you are plaqued with this ailment too. A hug for you!
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