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Author Topic: How do you NOT google?????  (Read 292 times)

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Offline Lindsay2427

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How do you NOT google?????
« on: April 08, 2014, 09:03:39 PM »
I have been obsessed with googling since I had assess to a computer maybe 13 or 14 years old now almost 27 The only way to e explain my googling is as addiction it obsession. I have had obsessive HA since prob 12. Before Internet accsess I would find things on my body and obsess over it being cancer. I would check it multiple times a day. I would check it in the middle of the night. Then the Internet researching began and I can not stop it. It is like fuel to my HA. It's compulsive. Some days I will google my symptoms ALL DAY (like today) and of course you end up on a young persons cancer support forum. Tjen I panic, cry have an anxiety attack. I have got to sto this. It comes is cycles. I will stop googling my symptoms for weeks and then I will have a symptom or read about cancer and boom it's back. Right now my obsession is colon cancer due to mild intermittent rectal bleeding. I'm fixated in it. No matter how hard to try I can't stop thinking about it. I can be having a conversation with someone and all I think about is me having CC. It's seriously like OCD.
My other fears have been AIDS, brain cancer, skin cancer, breast cancer, panceratic cancer, tumor in my jaw, lymphoma, cervical cancer, MS (mild and was actually relieved it wasn't cancer) I'm sure there is more I'm forgetting.
So my question is how do I over come this? My cancer fears and my obsessive googling. I don't fear a deadly car accident, I don't fear lupus, MA or heart I FEAR CANCER AND HAVE MY WHOLE LIFE!!!!
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Offline stephtronic

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #1 on: April 08, 2014, 09:11:39 PM »
One important thing for dealing with it is dealing with the anxiety directly. Do you see a therapist or take any sort of medications? Have you done CBT? Those are all things that can help you. When you don't have the anxiety, there won't be any need to google.

Until that happens, though, you have to realize that YOU are in control of yourself. You can stop yourself from googling. It may cause you extreme distress and make you more anxious for a while, but it's something that you have to bear through in able to stop the compulsion. The basis of the OCD compulsion is: distressing thought ---> compulsion ----> "temporary relief" ----> and around and around again. You have to break that cycle.

What sort of browser are you using? There are a lot of apps/extensions that can be used to block certain websites or redirect you. You can block medical websites or even you can have them redirect you straight to here or to a game or anything else.
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Offline Lindsay2427

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #2 on: April 08, 2014, 09:33:32 PM »
Thank you for your reply. I use my iPhone & iPad to google. It's easy and always with me. I even have compulsions to google while at red lights. It's that life consuming. I have not seen a therapist but need too. I don't understand how every human being doesn't fear cancer since we all have a small risk of developing it. I don't feel like the crazy one the ones who don't fear it seem crazy to me. But I know this isn't normal and I do need help. I need to break down and make myself an appt with someone. This is the complete opposite of depression. I love my life, my husband, our 4 children my parent so much I fear illness taking me from that. Its consuming my every thought
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Offline stephtronic

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #3 on: April 08, 2014, 09:53:34 PM »
That's how I was - I was scared because I loved my life so much and didn't want to get sick or die and have all of that be taken from me. Soon enough, though, you start to realize that all of that fear of losing everything is causing you to lose everything in all actuality. My husband said to me once while I was at the lowest of the low: "You say you are afraid because you don't want anything to change, but it already has." Which was so, so true. Think about it. How much time could you have spent with your children instead of googling symptoms? What about a movie night with your husband where you aren't thinking about dying?

I highly recommend seeking therapy/CBT/treatment of whatever sort will help you most, and that's a great first step to consider!
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Offline Sunlover

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2014, 11:25:56 AM »
I hear ya with the obsession!  I was like that.  I'd google something and nothing bad would come up, so I'd be happy... then 10 minutes later I'm like, "Oh maybe I didn't word it right, let me do it THIS way"   I'd keep going until something bad would come up (not purposely!) then the obsession with that bad thing started, so then I'd start googling that bad thing I found, thinking, "Well, I have 2 out of 5 symptoms, maybe I DO have it!"  then I'd google the other symptom - and like you it would be all day long at times back and forth to the computer.  I'd be in the middle of fixing the bed...  "Wait!  Let me try THESE words and see what comes up!"  "Ah, I'm fine..."  back to fixing the bed... "wait a minute!!"  run back to the computer...  word it differently....  "OH NO!!"  Panic, depression, etc...
Since February now I still have the urge to google but I do it differently - like my legs felt heavy and weak so I googled, "Anxiety heavy weak legs" and got a TON of hits!!   Put the word anxiety or stress in first, THEN the symptoms.  This way you don't have to go cold turkey AND you can find out if anxiety is causing it and how.
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Offline Hypo84

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2014, 11:32:48 AM »
Just force yourself to stop...your anxiety will rise up to a certain point and you have to hang in there because eventually it will subside.

Although, not Googling won't solve all your problems. Last fear I had about leukemia and nosebleeds I actually picked up on this forum. Some stories in papers can trigger it too.

There has to be a way to stop HA, I just haven't figured it out yet.
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Offline xxAmyxx

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #6 on: April 09, 2014, 12:15:06 PM »
I just STOPPED doing it! I remind myself that googling never makes me feel better, just more scared. My husband threatened to block all medical websites, maybe you should do that?
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Offline Lindsay2427

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #7 on: April 09, 2014, 01:47:21 PM »
I need to block sites. I have already googles this morning. The same thing "retcal bleeding" this CC fear this seriously controlling my life.
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Offline Roman

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Re: How do you NOT google?????
« Reply #8 on: April 09, 2014, 02:31:55 PM »
Dr. Google is the worst doctor in the world but somehow we still keep going to him.
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