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Author Topic: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?  (Read 539 times)

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Offline lauren4329

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After doctor visit after doctor visit, blood test after blood test, and even an mri, I'm finally convinced I'm not dying. My symptoms are completely random and seem to alternate in phases that last for days or weeks...these symptoms including sharp stabbing head pains, dull headaches, feeling like I can't get enough breath into my lungs, sharp stabbing pains, and ear aches. Although these symptoms are terrible, never stop, and distract me from my day to day life all the time, I'm beginning to realize that the symptoms are too varied to indicate something like cancer. However, I still hurt all over every day, and because of this my anxiety never seems start to fade, therefore always leaving me with terrible symtpoms. How do I get out of this terrible cycle? I just want my body to feel better again, and everytime my mind starts getting better, m body starts hurting and negativity strikes my mind again
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Offline ashmaster

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #1 on: April 02, 2014, 03:07:06 PM »
When you figure it out I would like to know as well. It seems like my anxiety is caused by my health; but if they say my health is because of my anxiety then its a never ending cycle. You have to "try" and relax, a conundrum in itself.
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Offline Sailormoonjf

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #2 on: April 02, 2014, 03:40:10 PM »
I am the same way.  Whenever I finally convince myself it is anxiety the "symptom" goes away, but it is typically replaced with another.  Sometimes I feel like my mind is trying to punish me for something.  I do notice that if I am really busy or if I can distract myself I will not have any symptoms.  It's really only when I have downtime or exercising (plenty of time to think) is when I will get the symptoms back.  My only suggestion is to try and keep busy long enough to forget what you're worrying about (which if you have obsessive thoughts like me may be a bit hard).

Best of luck!!   :action-smiley-065:
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Offline Hypo84

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #3 on: April 02, 2014, 05:06:13 PM »
You wouldn't have a problem if you didn't have symptoms, and you wouldn't have HA too.

There is no point in thinking how can I stop symptoms from happening. Right thinking would be, how can I live an awesome life with these symptoms that are annoying? Think about that, and when you figure it out and start implementing it, your symptoms might stop. ;)
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Offline noella6

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #4 on: April 02, 2014, 06:44:33 PM »
Interesting question, and one that I used to grapple with quite a lot.

I used to say that IF the symptoms went away, I would be better! I would stop worrying, as it was the symptoms constantly manifesting that made me feel crazy, cursed, like a failure at life.........it led me to hating my body, as if my body was this separate entity that existed only to frighten me, bully me, punish me.

After therapy I came to realize that it is how i RESPOND to the symptoms that makes or breaks the anxiety pattern.
I had to learn that my responses/reactions to the pains, lumps and scary sensations were what was making my life a living hell.

So then I wanted to ask "But surely this isn't normal? Surely normal people don't get this many ailments and symptoms, right?"
But the answer is yes, they might, but their responses are entirely different to mine.
For example, I once had a massive panic reaction to a rash on my leg during a therapy session. I asked the therapist what she would think if she found a similar rash on her leg. And she just shrugged and said "I dunno, I'd probably thing something had irritated it"
And I was in awe, for I saw meningitis, fatal viruses, blood poisoning........etc.
How we differed!

So over time, if our responses improve, and we learn from previous mistakes, our attention would be less focused upon the symptoms, if that makes sense? So that they would be somewhat normalized, forgettable, just a bit of nothing.
I do think that focus and the attention we give to our bodies is the crucial thing.

So imagine if your symptoms go away, of course you'd feel happy, we all would! But the truth is, the anxiety itself would just go underground, possibly fix itself to some other life issue, until the next symptom popped up..........

A great thing someone once asked me when i was freaking out about auto immune diseases was "How many times have you thought you've been suffering from a terrible disease in the past 5 years?"
I said "hundreds, why?"
And she said "And how many times were your suspicions correct?"
"Er, ....none".

Food for thought.
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"Giants exist to deceive, they retreat if they're clearly perceived"

Offline anagargano

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #5 on: April 02, 2014, 07:06:37 PM »
very good post ..love it....now I wish I cld put into practise..
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Offline lauren4329

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #6 on: April 02, 2014, 08:20:38 PM »
Thank you all so much for the great replies. I really try hard to implement a mentality like that into myself but it's hard for me to hold on. I wake up every morning and tell myself today is the day I'm going to start the path to fixing myself and then i get a stab of pain and that mentality flies out the window. I'm desperate and willing to change my thoughts, but i don't know how to do that without therapy or meds (unfortunately, neither are an option anytime soon)
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Offline Calamy

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #7 on: April 02, 2014, 10:49:42 PM »
wonderful post, noella.  :happy0151:
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"Fear is such a vicious thing; it wraps me up in chains." - Tears for Fears, "The Working Hour"

Online mollyfin

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #8 on: April 02, 2014, 11:11:56 PM »
Thank you all so much for the great replies. I really try hard to implement a mentality like that into myself but it's hard for me to hold on. I wake up every morning and tell myself today is the day I'm going to start the path to fixing myself and then i get a stab of pain and that mentality flies out the window. I'm desperate and willing to change my thoughts, but i don't know how to do that without therapy or meds (unfortunately, neither are an option anytime soon)

YOU CAN DO IT.  I've improved a lot on my own - I do still have moments of terror and panic, but I post here maybe once a month with a concern now, instead of either obsessing over one thing for months or having a new thing every few days.  It's not perfect but it's a start! 

I went to my doctor, got a thorough check-up and had blood tests run.  I was told there's nothing wrong with me.  I just had to accept it.  So I tried and tried to ignore my symptoms and finally...I guess they got sick of being ignored because they eventually went away.

I do still have symptoms from time to time.  Often anxiety-based, or greatly inflated by my anxiety.  Sometimes I freak out, but I'm getting better about that, too. 

If I can improve, ANYONE can! 

I can't give you links - the forum frowns upon it - but there are cognitive behavioral exercises online that you can read about that might help you. 
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Offline Daisy55

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #9 on: April 02, 2014, 11:15:08 PM »
Wonderful to hear you are well Lauren.

There are many online helps about taking thoughts captive.  One may not be the whole help, but several put together may be just right, one building on another.
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You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.  
John 8:32

Offline Daisy55

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #10 on: April 02, 2014, 11:20:46 PM »
Wonderful to hear you are well Lauren.

There are many online helps about taking thoughts captive.  One may not be the whole help, but several put together may be just right, one building on another.
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You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.  
John 8:32

Offline uno76

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #11 on: April 03, 2014, 11:21:02 AM »
This post fits me to a t! I'm wondering why this happens to me too.I am currently dealing with the same thing.
It is so frustrating also because during all of this I'm losing weight more and more.I'm in tears now and feel like I'm just sinking.
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Offline Blueberry

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #12 on: April 03, 2014, 12:17:42 PM »
You just gotta calm youself down and convince yourself you're fine. If bad thoughts come to mind, push them out or just stop thinking. Do things to relieve stress, make sure you're hydrated, and sleep well. Keep yourself as stress free as possible.

Somehow a two or three weeks ago I cured my stress but now it's back and I gotta repeat the whole process. It's really hard and I feel terrible but you can do it if you try.
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Offline Jenin

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #13 on: April 03, 2014, 12:20:05 PM »
this sounds like it could be me.  (to those who have read my many posts telling my story, I am sorry-- I get some kind of solace from writing about it/receiving reassurance).  I developed HA last year, mostly over breast cancer (I found out I was BRCA positive AFTER I had become really concerned about breast cancer due to a friend of a friend dying of it in her 30's).  I thought I kicked it by finding ways to rationalize, etc.  But then a couple weeks ago I started having pain in my side, around the same time learned that my 24 year old neighbor is dying of testicular cancer (knew he had it for a couple years, didn't know he was going to die).  Since then, it has just been a terrible, terrible couple of weeks.  The pain in my side is real.  Doctor said it was muscular because I work out a lot (and have a more mild pain on the left side as well).  But I realized I also had had it for a couple of months only when working out; now have it more or less constantly, although it is mild and dull and disappears occasionally.  Can't stop thinking it's some sort of cancer that's metastasized to my organs. Then I had stomach cramps and digestive issues; became sure I had stomach cancer or some kind of related cancer.  Then my throat felt swollen on one side.  Was sure I had throat cancer.  This morning a colleague told me his wife has BC--set off those fears again.  It is literally never ending, the only relief I get is sleep although even then I find I am dreaming I am told I have cancer or other terrible things.  I even started therapy but it is not helping so far.  In fact, my psychologist even said with my BRCA-2 positivity my HA was "reasonable" which really did not help!
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Jenin

Offline lauren4329

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Re: How can I ever start recovering when the symptoms never stop?
« Reply #14 on: April 03, 2014, 07:11:02 PM »
My big problem is that I can't seem to ignore the symptoms because they are so painful and distracting. I can't concentrate on my school work because I'm always distracted by pain. This is wrecking my life. I'm so scared of dying, yet I can't live in the moment because of my pain. I worked so hard throughout high school to get into the college of my dreams out of state, but now I'm barely able to get up and go to school, much less be able to move across the country. I want my life back and I don't understand how I'm trying so hard to change my HA mentality but the pain won't let me do that
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